Sexual damaged N

Just a justification for his bad behavior which he is blaming on someone else. If he really felt it was a problem and wanted to change he would take the steps to fix the issue. Remember, if he deals with it, he won't have an excuse to work your pity on...

If his childhood includes abuse, abuse that you are not the cause of or solution to, advise him tonseek professional counselin, and that is all. You are not a therapist, and you are not responsible for his mental well-being, nor are you obligated to place yourself in harm's way, while this man works out his emotional demons on you and all who interact with him. He is an adult. As children, wew have little control or ability to protect ourselves from being abused, therefore we cannot be held responsible for what happens to us. However, as adults we DO have responsibility tonrecognize when we need help and to seek help, rather than "spread the joy"of our childhood trauma by "paying it forward". We have a responsibility to work our issues out so as not tonharm others. That is what his responsibility is. And yo, as an adult, have a responsibility to keep yourself safe, which means to steer clear of this train wreck of an N. If you consider yourself a caring person, your caring has to begin with you. Care for yourself, keep safe with NC, and let him work his issues out with a professional therapist. Hold him to the same standard you would have for yourself or any other adult. None of us had "normal" childhoods, that does not give you a license to go around. Being effed up and abusive to others. We are not responsible for the abuse in our lives, especially in our childhoods...we ARE responsible for sorting it out and not perpetuating it.