People treat us the way we ALLOW them to treat us & review of 50 Shades of Grey

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#1 Nov 12 - 6AM
Goldie's picture

People treat us the way we ALLOW them to treat us & review of 50 Shades of Grey

Yes, that would be my take as well. The book was filled with TYPICAL entry level B&D, S&M, type of stuff. If you have read anything on the subject, this type of thing or book is 101. I guess it appeals to the typical housewife or single, who is looking for some spark and spice to their dull or non existent sex life. A somewhat naive woman who THINKS this shit translates into love somehow. Or desire from him. A way to hold on to him, if you will.

I saw porno back in the 70's which was racier than this book, it was a big yawn for me, AND somewhat sad to me, that many women STILL THINK, that SEX is the way to a man's heart.

Reminds me of that book, "The Secrets" like it was some NEW or BIG, thing, it was all taken from tried and true concepts which have existed for centuries, nothing new there either.

What it shows me, is just how much of our population live's in darkness. Like with health foods, these concepts have existed for decades and now they read it like it is some new thing.

Apparently ignorance is bliss for many.

I have rarely had a guy present such a concept to me, aside from HINTS about a few small things. I ALWAYS PRETENDED, I had no clue what they were talking about and they took a pass on me. They preen you from the first encounter, with comments, to see how you will react. I had one guy ask me what I would do if he forced me to do something and I sweetly smiled at him and said innocently, first I would punch you as hard as I could and then I would call 911, and he said softly, OK OK, I GET IT. Needless to say, the topic was never broached again.

We get treated the way we allow others to treat us and we do what we want to do, this is my take on the subject.

Where you have boundaries there is no control, where you don't, there is. Really is that simple when all is said and done.

I lacked boundaries with the money thing, so I got taken advantage of in that area, I had strong boundaries with the sex thing and they never crossed them.

Many Many woman here are under the delusion that if, you do what a man wants, he will love you more or respect you more. WHEN the TRUTH of the matter is the EXACT opposite, he will respect you less. A woman with strong boundaries is loved and respected far more than a woman without. I have seen this fact played out time and time again. There is no doubt about this fact to me.

This is one of life's secrets, that some women know and GET, and many do not. If I can impart this one fact on any of you here, then I have done my job.

Lots, of love,

[email protected]

Dec 23 - 5PM
Selena's picture

50 Shades Prepped Me For My Narc

Dec 24 - 5AM (Reply to #56)
confusedenough's picture

Wow Selena I love this!!! And

Nov 26 - 4PM
Goldie's picture


Dec 17 - 11AM
broken23's picture

Goldie you sometimes post

Dec 16 - 6PM
Goldie's picture

Well worth reading this entire thread

Dec 17 - 12PM (Reply to #52)
Portia's picture

A word of warning can prepare you for the battle!

Jun 7 - 6PM
Laci423's picture

Fantastic blog

Nov 5 - 9AM
spinning's picture

Bump for the newbies, for the lurkers,


Oct 17 - 2AM
Luv2bme's picture

Learning to place boundries

Oct 14 - 3PM
josiekl's picture

This is all so true. I read

Mar 11 - 5PM
Mirrorme's picture

I'm listening I'm hearing....

Mar 11 - 5PM (Reply to #45)
Goldie's picture

TRUE, however........

Mar 11 - 5PM (Reply to #46)
Mirrorme's picture

No mam.. A ticket straight to

Jan 24 - 8PM
Butterflystar's picture


Nov 17 - 11AM
petite7heaven's picture

Great Post Goldie!

Jan 24 - 1PM (Reply to #42)
Goldie's picture

We always have the right to just say NO

Nov 26 - 7AM (Reply to #41)
Goldie's picture

Self empowerment will get you everywhere in life.

Nov 13 - 10AM
Deidre99's picture

''Many Many woman here are

Nov 13 - 11AM (Reply to #38)
IncognitoBurrito's picture


Nov 14 - 9AM (Reply to #39)
Deidre99's picture

i also view 50 shades, as a

Nov 13 - 6AM
IncognitoBurrito's picture

I'm never

Nov 12 - 7PM
tresor2's picture

Did We Teach The Narc?

Nov 13 - 2AM (Reply to #30)
Goldie's picture

And this is the very attiutde which keeps many stuck

Sep 28 - 1PM (Reply to #35)
Better Now
Better Now's picture

Amen to that

Nov 13 - 10AM (Reply to #34)
indifferent's picture

Well said

Nov 13 - 2AM (Reply to #31)
Used's picture


Nov 13 - 3AM (Reply to #32)
Goldie's picture

Yes Used

Nov 13 - 4AM (Reply to #33)
spinning's picture

Wow, do I ever love


Nov 13 - 1AM (Reply to #29)
Journey's picture

Saying we teach others how to

Journey on...

Nov 12 - 5PM
Sickofhim's picture

I don't know how it happened