Do they Mark Their Territory?

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#1 Jun 9 - 3PM
Anonymous (not verified)
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Do they Mark Their Territory?

This, for some reason seems related to his Narcissism:

He can go for months putting the toilet seat down after he uses it and leaves it clean. Then for some reason, every time he uses it, he drips on it, or he leaves the seat up so I have to put it down before using it. That can go on for a couple weeks for every single time he uses it, and then he's back to being a gentleman about it again. He ripped my brother up and down about it when he left the seat up here at our house one time, that's why it seems so peculiar. It's like he wants me to clean up the pee, if I'm going to use his toilet or I'm going to have to put the seat down myself.

Another strange one:

After I clean our bathroom sink, he spits a big ole' chunk of toothpaste on the "cold" handle and across the spicket. He only does it one time and leaves it there, so if I have to use the cold water, I have to either clean it or stick my fingers in it and wash off. I noticed he only does it after I clean the sink. He would never spit toothpaste on it again until I cleaned it. So I knew he was doing on purpose, not by mistake. I thought, how strange he would go to that much trouble. At first I was cleaning it up everytime, then after I started putting it together, I just stopped cleaning it and he would leave it there - he would not add anymore to it. It had about worn off by yesterday and I noticed a new chunk spit on there, and a couple of chunks were in the sink (which I did not clean up). A little while later, the chunks in the sink were gone, but the chunk on the cold handle was still there, bright and red. He also flosses his teeth and makes it all fly on the mirror. Chunks of who knows what on the mirror until I can't see to brush my hair. I asked him about that, I didn't know about Narcissism then. His reaction was just this big wide smile. I said could you stop doing that? He didn't say yes or no, that's why I think the pee thing and toothpaste thing are part of it.

Anyone have weird stuff going on like that?

Jun 10 - 9AM
Suzie (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

wow

what a child!!! Mine liked to shave right after I cleaned the bathroom sink, getting little black hairs all over everything. But if I hadn't cleaned he would rinse them down the sink(most of it). He is a pig. Leah
Jun 9 - 6PM
neveragain
neveragain's picture

Gross Gaslighting

I'd say that what he's doing is a form of gaslighting. He's trying to literally drive you crazy. He's trying to push your buttons, get you to react so he can say, "Look how crazy you are!" Don't do anything about it. Simply write it all down. The date and time you found stuff.....and all the things he does that are "crazy making" behaviors. Documenting everything not only makes you feel more empowered, it's a real trail of what is really going on here. It really, really helps. What a childish, immature, gross man he is!!! Bleck!!! neveragain
Jun 9 - 4PM
quietude (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

worndown

Okay, you get the 'gross post of the day award'..haha, just teasing you! I think this is about entitlement and disrespect for you. And how demeaning to "make" you clean it up. That 5 year old child is playing games and messing with your head. Testing and breaking boundaries. Him 'ripping' your brother for doing the same, well - what's okay for them is never ok for anyone else. And don't ever point that out to them...I've made that mistake! Mine was a NEAT freak, and if I didn't do certain things the way he wanted, I was criticised. But it's all the same...it's all about control, no matter what means they use.
Jun 9 - 9PM (Reply to #2)
cassiemay
cassiemay's picture

oh yeah....

I asked my STBX so many times to just put his dirty laundry in the laundry basket about 5 feet away (literally) from where he typically shed his clothes. He NEVER recognized this request. I even said to him, you know, when you don't do this it's like a big silent "fuck you" message. Didn't make one iota of difference.