One Year Later and He's Back

There is something weird that goes off in them when they actually SEE you. I have seen it in some weird ways. I'm not sure how to explain it but I've seen some expressions that were just 'weird' when the ex saw me after weeks or months. Unexplainable for a normal person. Then they seem obsessed with you again, for the moment. It's something I have come to expect and prepare for now. almostlydia

Its still so suprising to me every time how entitled these people think they are even though i shouldnt be after reading things on this board So he sees you and thinks that he can send a text and then all the past poof disappears? I read somewhere this is how their mind works...they forget just like that all the abuse they put people through because they cant really take true ownership for any of the pain they cause. Real change looks way different than this. Its funny though his text is still all about him and how he is feeling. what happened to the basic how are you doing or how have you been?? oh wait, that means he would have to ask you about you...instead he would rather tell you about him and what he thinks because that is the most important thing. these guys never change...they are all the same.

They never go away. Only lie in wait. Block him honey. I hope you never forget the horrible events that lead you to this forum. I see you came here 48 weeks ago. So you found the forum one week out of NC. Do you remember this week? The thoughts and feelings. The pain the confusion. The anger and anguish. Please dont forget luv. Im glad after all most a year later you still come back here to where you know its safe. Thinking of you tonight...xoxo only one way to go...Forward (tm?)

I left mine. We had contact because of the divorce. But very little. I was very afraid f him & only wanted away. I knew he would replace me immediately. I learned later how immediately. He made very few attempts at reconciliation (only when he thought he could not refinance the house & it would be sold). But, he had a new woman the day I left him. He had a month's notice to line up a new one for the day I left. At exactly 10 months after my departure, 3 weeks before the scheduled divorce date, he called & asked me to a concert. (I answered thinking it was about the divorce & our joint taxes.) I said no to the concert. Then he asked me if I would reconcile. I said, Gee, I don't know (didn't want to piss him off because there was money in the taxes). Two days later there was a long phone message about how much he loved me. I sent an e-mail: Reconciliation is not possible. Six weeks later, I was contacted by the woman who replaced me. She had run out on him 32 hours before I got the phone call for the concert (with ticket she had purchased). That's why he called me to reconcile. She'd dumped him. (Their first date, the day before I moved out, was with a ticket I had purchased but refused to go with him. He used all the tickets she purchased to find the woman he's with now!) Your N saw you. Then he compared you to what he's got going. You're better. Also, he's upset that YOU are doing so well WITHOUT him so he needs to get back in there to tear you down. These guys never let a woman go. They will come back years later. Why? Because YOU, ME -- all of us -- we belong to them. We are genies in a bottle that they shake out when they want another go around.

your posts is a bit spooky, cos in 2months time, i will be a year nc, with both exh and narc, i d/d them within a week of each other, and tho narc still appeared, we live near each other, exh lives out of town, exh has began putting feelers outwith our kids, and its his birthday a day after i d/d him. i have told kid,s i am not interested and here comes the suprise, they all said good, they used to think the world of him realy loved him, that gobsmacked me what the kids said, i believe exh[after i d/d him still expected some form of communication, thru kids, well i never mentioned him after, this is the longest we have not talked or seen each other in over 40years i met him at 15. my time away from the pair of them has been so enlighten, sometimes depressing, but always not regreting getting rid of them. my nm has also been in touch with my kids, asking if i will speak to her[thats 7years nc with her]and asking if i would accept anything off her i said tell her no. its her birthday next week, sometimes they[i believe] get reminders of us, and think oh time has passed i will try again, she might have forgotton what i done to her[cos they have], well not in this life time, talk about the eternal triangle with the three of them.lol