Notice its usually BOY not MAN

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#1 Apr 23 - 12PM
Janet
Janet's picture

Notice its usually BOY not MAN

Have you noticed that we often refer to the narc as ****BOY and not ****MAN.

Apr 24 - 8AM
narcnarcwhosthere (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

the childlike Narc......

the psycho is like an evil three year old....he also would run... often take off at any hint of confrontation or having been found out....but sometimes he would attack instead....made it very hard to second guess him..... he pouted like a child...withheld like a child...had tantrums like a child...wheedled like a child... even creepier is that he often referred to himself as a 'boy'........'i've been a bad boy'.....'i'm a tired boy'...'i'm a bored boy'......ugggggghhhhhhh...... an evil peter pan..........
Apr 23 - 7PM
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

and...

they're not even human perhaps IT, the THING, CREATURE, etc would be more appropriate ~~~~~~~~~ Moving Forward: Coaching for Victims Pathologicals Feelings buried alive never die. - Alice Miller
Apr 23 - 6PM
woundedsoul36
woundedsoul36's picture

Lisa's Book gave me my "ahh

Lisa's Book gave me my "ahh haa" moment...it gave me the clue to who he is... "why women love psychopaths" gave me the answers to why he is the way he is "the sociopath next door"...put it ALL together for me. IT'S A MUST READ..couldnt tear my eyes away. Now I know how to spot them as to make sure I never go through this gain Mine was the charming and sexy type... I thought it was weird when after a few weeks he had all these "crisis's".. little did I know he really wanted pity and attention...(redflag- a grown man wanting pity) and like any other compassionate person, I gave it too him
Apr 23 - 5PM
Monica
Monica's picture

Spoiled child....

When I started fighting back, knowing I didn't want the "relationship" anymore and knowing I just wanted him to leave me alone, I started calling him on his behavior and how he treated me and others in general. He texted me something like "I never grew out of being a spoiled child and I know I have to work on that." Child? For once, he wasn't telling a lie. Work on it? I wanted to tell him..."don't waste your time, dude, you can never change at this point in your life." Took me months and months to get him to leave me alone and understand that I was DONE with him on a personal level. They are boys. They never were, never will be, never can be "men." But even "boys" isn't quite accurate. Boys are human. These jerks are NOT.
Apr 23 - 5PM (Reply to #7)
sanctuary
sanctuary's picture

HA HA "...and I know I have

HA HA "...and I know I have to work on that." There's your lie. BS! Just trying to hook you in. You are so right, they can't change!
Apr 23 - 6PM (Reply to #8)
Monica
Monica's picture

I wish I had had the guts.....

...to tell him just that. "You can't change!" I had started challenging the lies, he knew it, I was no longer "accepting" his fantasy life and "playing along" and I knew he was NOT happy about that. But he didn't rage...he RAN. Panicked. Scared. His "toy" was no longer useful to him. I not only wanted him to run, I was knowingly chasing him away. But I knew (thanks to Barbara and this site) that going into too many details about what I knew about him and his disorder and the years of lies was just a waste of my time and efforts and emotions. I just wanted to make clear to him that THE GIG WAS UP. I was onto him. That was enough for me. Though as recently as two weeks ago he tried to reel me in again (doing end-runs around my NC). This fish ain't biting anymore.
Apr 23 - 8PM (Reply to #12)
neveragain5
neveragain5's picture

Hi Monica, How long did he

Hi Monica, How long did he disappear for? I was SO enraged at the end! I went to the cops and told him about it and called him out on EVERYTHING. I too wanted mine to run. I wanted him to know that he wasn't going to pull one over on me. It felt good to be able to let him know that I knew what he was.
Apr 23 - 7PM (Reply to #9)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

truth and a Narc

once you ask for accountability once you hit them with what you firmly know to be truth... ...they run from you like a vampire from a xenon flashlight! ~~~~~~~~~ Moving Forward: Coaching for Victims Pathologicals Feelings buried alive never die. - Alice Miller
Apr 23 - 8PM (Reply to #10)
Monica
Monica's picture

Barbara...that is the perfect analogy!

"...they run from you like a vampire from a xenon flashlight!" That is exactly how it seemed like me! One day, he literally ran away from me, talking all the way, more lies, lies, lies to a question I posed to him asking for proof of something. He was quickly walking AWAY from me and out the door, talking over his shoulder as he went. I realized then that I had him in a panic. And it was about time. I had SO had it by then. And everything he had said as he ran was a lie. Took me about 10 minutes to confirm that. I confirmed it more for me than for him. I knew it was a waste of time to get mad and confront him. Proving the lies just made me stronger and more determined to extract him from my life.
Apr 23 - 11PM (Reply to #11)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

analogy

"...they run from you like a vampire from a xenon flashlight!" I can't take credit - I nicked it from narcnarc! ~~~~~~~~~ Moving Forward: Coaching for Victims Pathologicals Feelings buried alive never die. - Alice Miller
Apr 23 - 4PM
TygerTyger
TygerTyger's picture

Mine reminded me of roughly

Mine reminded me of roughly a 17 year old boy in a 50 year old body.
Apr 23 - 8PM (Reply to #5)
neveragain5
neveragain5's picture

Mine too, but he is about to

Mine too, but he is about to turn 37.
Apr 23 - 12PM
herlatestvictim
herlatestvictim's picture

even women can be little girls

My N is a woman and she is a 3 year old, at best! She hates being referred to as a woman and always says she is mistaken for a teenager! She dresses like a teenager and talks like a baby. All this works for her as she manipulates every woman who has mother like qualities... talk about "mommy" issues! (Yes, she refers to her mother as mommy.)
Apr 23 - 12PM
woundedsoul36
woundedsoul36's picture

because they are emotionally

because they are emotionally stunted, the have the emotional capabilities of a 4yr.old their manipulation tactics have just evolved form temper tantrums and "mine" "mine" "mine" to more evil and sadistic ways
Apr 24 - 7AM (Reply to #2)
Amazed
Amazed's picture

That is why it blows my mind that these guys have kids

Really scary, exN runs away from accountability to his children, his x wife is raising them all on her own, no child support..