Narcs and other men

The exn had ZERO male friends. No one called his cell except the woman that I caught him cheating with, a married teacher he's known/dated/fooled around with before she met her husband. He had 1 guy friend in college and this friend liked the girl he was stringing along and this friend got in a fight with him and that friendship ended. I am now good friends with this college female friend and she told me that this guy friend asked her one time, "why do you put up with his bullshit?" Hmm...guys knows guys and women know women, right? He worked in education and all "friends" were ex's he was able to keep as supply and fool and the married women that he used for supply and ego stroke. Many he had emotional affairs or physical affairs with. My guy friends felt something was not right about him and one who is a construction worker shook his hand when he met him and thought, "this guy is a piece of shit" Later he told me he just got a bad vibe. No guy friends or no guy friends from college that are friends today. The friends he has today, he rarely saw or talked to on any regular basis, except the one that he cheated with and now friends with the new OW/wife.

The only men he would associate with are lesser than him. Via, age, job status, . Most of the people he associates with are women. When I was around he would fight with someone about something! And move on to the next friend. Gee, imagine that! Mr. Perfect! He just churns and burns! He does have a female married woman, who of current is usuing for his business,( Dog Training) he couldn't do anything without her. He's too stupid and lazy! Maybe he relates to dogs so well because he is about a smart as a dog! Pea Brain! Hunter

My N has tons of male friends. He will do anything for them without any kind of pay. (Well they would have to supply his beer) lol...He is all about his male friends. But, they are very powerful friends.. Suppose that's why... They have lied, paid fincially for his mistakes, and down right taken care of him his whole life.. He never did anything for me. Nothing that he promised.. Nothing, Nothing, all a lie..

Mine had male friends from his school days that all lived in a different state and that he kept in touch with and would go crying to whenever we would have a breakup. Of course, he needed sympathy supply from them and would throw me under the bus - it was never HIS fault. Funny though, I eventually met these old friends and was surprised that the "closeness" just wasn't there. If anything, they were buddies from days gone by that stayed in touch. Obviously, they didn't make the effort to stay friends with exN they way exN made the effort to stay friendly. He stayed in touch with people from his past - but none were "close friends". I notice too that when men did try to be his friend, he would criticize them constantly. The ones he seemed to admire (from a distance) where the ones who really wouldn't give him much more than the time of day. I'm telling you - narcs are fascinated with people who don't really care about them. The ones who do seem interested in them are the ones the Narc will always D& D in the end. Their subconscious reasoning is: If this person wants to associate with ME, there must be something WRONG with them!

I was not central to his social life - i often felt like the wife left at home without the benefits of marriage. He kept me as a favorite toy, but did not need me...as we all can see now. He is Mr. Popular pothead. But actually he is genuinely nice to people, makes them feel comfortable, friendly and likes to cook for friends - only evil to me from what I could see.

Mine had no friends and the ones he said he had he never saw. One who he hadnt seen for years kept him supplied with email porn. He was also the one to drop everything to drive so called friends to the airport or fix something they had broken. He had sisters which he kept in touch with but never discussed personal things with them. He has a very lonely existance without me there.

The ex-Psych prof's relationship with other men was troubled&complicated. It was his ex-BOYFRIEND, not an ex-girlfriend or an ex-wife, who warned me. He was Daddy's little boy; he parroted his father's arguments on everything. He's a professor because his father is one. His father is proud of NOT being a "Massachusetts liberal." He claims the same. He'd regale me with stories of his freshman year football player roommate, or how he lived with 7 men while going to the University of Virginia. In my presence, he'd ogle other men instead of other women. His freshman lab assistant thought the much shorter professor was eyeing them. His girlfriend dressed in jeans&a tank top... like his male disciples. Yet he was virulently homophobic, cruelly mocking the African-American gay rapper Rainbow Flava. He was orgasmic when Clinton signed DOMA (the mid-90s sigh) he had a major crush on New Mexico's Republican governor/Iron Man triathlete (now a GOP presidential candidate for 2012) Gary Johnson. He saw other men as competition.. so he hated competing with them. I think in some twisted way, he probably treated other men *WORSE* than he treated women, despite the fact he favored male students over female ones. Outwardly, he treated men better than women... but as with all Ns, it was a veneer.

My ex-narc has few male friends anymore, mostly coworkers he works and travels with. His ex-wife turned an entire community against him (go, girl!) and he lost most of his friends. He has two friends from his "past" that he occasionally hangs out with. I found out recently that one is actually two-facing him. This friend and his wife stayed close friend's with narc's ex-wife and are telling people that the reason the marriage went sour is not because of the ex-wife but because of the narc! And ex-narc still hangs out with this guy. The guy probably takes everything back to the ex-wife that he hears from ex-narc!!! I call that beautiful karma.

mine has no close male friends, just male co-workers that he travels with sometimes. They all drink and party together (according to him) one of the few times I actually saw him in person, he spent most of the evening and night on the phone with male c-workers, I was lying in bed in a hotel room, first time seeing him in a month and he was yammering on and on and on about work shit. I finally threw a pillow at him, I was furious at being ignored! When my husband called him after he threatened me and told him to leave me alone, he sent my husband a text message, saying he was truly sorry and would not contact me again. It was so submissive that my first reaction was "what a pussy". I think he's very good at controlling and manipulating women but doesn't feel "equal" to other men.

Esp those from his old fame days - he lights up with happiness when they call - he preferred their company over me - they build his image and make him feel powerful. He is not gay and has never been gay but was a man's man to a crazy degree. The house where all the men go to watch the game to get to a man cave and away from their wives... he was also kind and helpful to his male friends, rides to the airport, help with broken cars, birthdays etc. I was the only person I ever saw him be mean to. he did not like reporters either - worried about bad press...

with other men he would talk about them like he was a female to me and do nothing. Other men intimidate him and he has no close male friends.

my Narc was a chicken. Totally tormented women, lashed out and berated them all the time. Boasted about it too. Men, he almost seemed to me to be so small in comparison to other men. Not his literal size, he is a big guy, I mean figuratively. Small. Insignificant. (ooh, except for elderly men...he treated them like he treated women) I really started to see that clearly in the end. He was uncomfortable in most social situations so he had to turn the attention on himself in such a dramatic way so that he didn't feel insignificant. Hey look at me! Look at me! loser.