N Contacted Me Today.. I'm Confused

This is my first time telling my story on this forum so please be brutally honest with me with any advice you have. I really need it.

MY N. and I were together for 8 years. The warning signs were there from the very beginning but I chose to ignore it. To put it in short, He was a bigger guy and he lost a lot of weight and girls started noticing. I believe he's always been a narcissist but when he was bigger he never had a chance with the types that he was into so he stuck by me ( I myself am a bigger woman). He broke up with my because he said we were fighting too much and he couldn't deal with it, even though we still lived together and still did the same things in the bedroom together. Things got worse when I asked him to give me another chance, he told me to lose the weight and then we'd be together, stupid me agreed and I tried to lose the weight but I wasn't doing it for me, I was doing it for him out of desperation. He started treating me worse, ignoring me, only hanging out with me when there was no one else to hang out with. I had speculations he was seeing other people but kept assuring me that I was the one for him. Things got so bad that I ended up moving back to my parents in a different province thinking he would realize what a mistake he made. I continued to fall for all his BS and suggested we travel to asia together thinking that would change things. He obviously agreed because it was a free trip. While we were there he brainwashed me to believe that if he could sleep with an escort in Hong Kong that we would then be able to get back together. I stupidly agreed and after that we were together. Later I thought he would ask me to move back with him but no we were in two different provinces trying to have a long distance relationship, when I say we I mean I was working on the relationship while he was off seeing other girls. Whenever I had doubts he would turn it around on me saying that I was acting crazy and that he had been loyal the entire relationship. About a month ago I had felt so alone and feeling as the the relationship was going nowhere. He had owed me some money that I needed so I called him up asking him for it and I told him that he was inconsiderate of my situation ( I'm living on my own on a single income and barely making it by) and that was when he told me he wanted to make things easier on me and said that he had been cheating on me the entire long distance relationship. He blamed it on me because of my weight and he felt like because we were fighting all the time it wasn't like we really were together. This is someone that I've been with for 8 years.. I was obviously devestated but desparate for him back that I made a deal with him that I would lose the weight if he would stop sleeping with other girls.. he agreed.. sort of. When I had a chance to think about what happened I decided I couldn't do this to myself so I wrote him a polite text saying that it was over. I had gone NC for 3 weeks before I caved in and wanted him back. When I contacted him He gave me the impression that we could work things out and that we needed more time. He said that "Things always work out for us in the long run... dont get impatient". So for 2 days things were okay.. but I still felt like something was wrong and I asked him if he was sleeping with anyone, in which he said no. i pressed him and said I just wanted to know if you're going to wait for me or just move on. He didn't understand what "wait for me" meant. so i called him to clarify and things got a little heated and he then told me that there was a girl in his bed and he moved her so that I could hear. He then said had to go eat and I told him that I haven't been able to eat for days.. where he then said "get get a happy meal then".

I'm devestated that this was a person that I was at one point in love with. He even told me that He still loved me.. but that confuses me because you wouldn't do those things to someone you love.

Right after that I changed my phone number and went NC for one week now. He just emailed me now at work saying

" I’m worried that I can’t get a hold of you. I realized that you’ve disconnected. Please tell me you’re Ok."

Knowing him I feel like he just wants to know that I'm ok to make sure that I've moved on...

I'm not going to be responding to him. I just want to know if he is a narcissist and what my next steps should be.

Any Advice would be great. Sorry for writing so much