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Love is For Suckers?

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#1 Oct 23 - 2PM
kizzy72
kizzy72's picture

Love is For Suckers?

If someone said this to you, then told you that by saying that is showing confidence and that men prefer women who have confidence and one's who act like they don't care.

Then told you that they were dating someone that who is a kind person, and very private and that person "keeps coming back to them" because of their ability to have confidence.

What would you think?

Oct 23 - 9PM
ready2receive
ready2receive's picture

Run like the wind

This person is SCREAMING at you quietly, "I'm a Narc, I'm a Narc, I'm a Narc. People just can't stay away from me because I am special - I have CONFIDENCE." BARF.
Oct 23 - 4PM
Done sourcing
Done sourcing's picture

We all stand at a crossroads---

and we can start a new life with new friends and new ideas and leave the past drama in the past. That is part of being free. I was so confused by your post I just thought, I don't want so much confusion and dysfunction in my life anymore. Too draining, too limiting, too chaotic. If I reject chaos, peace will find me. If I reject drama, serenity will come. If I reject noisy distraction, quiet will be with me. I like that I have a choice today. I like that the exwn is an ex. She is in the past, and I will keep her there! The anger still comes, as does irritation. They are my signals that I still have work to do. No problem, because I have tools today, and I moved out of the cesspool of insanity. ds
Oct 23 - 4PM (Reply to #7)
kizzy72
kizzy72's picture

Very confusing

I know its very confusing because I have to be very general because of what and who I've delt with and the business I'm in.
Oct 23 - 3PM
Used
Used's picture

KIZZY72

I would be so confused i would tell them to get lost...
Oct 23 - 3PM
Tigerlily
Tigerlily's picture

I would think

That that person is trying to (a) confuse me, (b) hook me and (c) trigger my insecurities, and I would run like hell!
Oct 23 - 3PM (Reply to #2)
kizzy72
kizzy72's picture

Well

I deal with a lot of people in a certain industry and this young lady, whom I've never met, is dating someone who is very private, and honestly would be pissed if he knew she told me they were dating because he tries to keep his private life separate This female I talked to one time on the phone and she's this beauty queen fitness trainer / christian, yet she's dating this guy who has had a lot of problems in the past and currently trying to get his life on track, but has has problems with people, including people invading his privacy. He doesn't like people to know who he's dating or his personal business, yet she told me she's dating him, but has this "love is for suckers" attitude, and even admitted to me that she dated another guy earlier this year, quickly interjecting that the guy she went out on a date with knows about "this guy" and that it was nothing intimate, but it didn't work out with the guy because he kissed a friend of hers and I'm sitting here thinking ok, why are you dating other guys if you feel the guy you are with is your soul mate. Then she's made post about how she recognizes game and you can't play a playa. She makes all kinds of double sided comments, but quotes scriptures in the Bible. If you are such a Christian, why would you have an "Love is for suckers" attitude, then tell a complete stranger that its because of this "confidence" is why your "current friend", "keeps coming back for more". All of this and she has never met me, and only talked to me one time on the phone and I know the guys brother (who she says just fell off the map and stop speaking to her back in July), and told me out of her own mouth that if he knew she were telling me any of this, he would be "floored" Needless to say, I've cut her off because I don't want to get in the middle of this. Sounds very female Narc to me.
Oct 23 - 3PM (Reply to #3)
Tigerlily
Tigerlily's picture

Good Idea

to cut her off and not get involved. I think more important than the question whether someone is a narc. or not is how we feel when we have contact with them. I would definitely feel irritated and upset by this woman`s inconsistencies, and that would be enough reason for me - now - to break off contact. Or are you concerned about the man involved? He can probably take care of himself. How well do you know him? Tigerlily
Oct 23 - 4PM (Reply to #4)
kizzy72
kizzy72's picture

His brother

Is the Narc that hurt me and led me to this board because I was so broken over what he did but I'm not on speaking terms. Well certain things started happening including this chick constantly hitting me up online, so I broke NC a few weeks ago and told the Narc that hurt me to please tell his friends to leave me alone and leave me at peace, then I blocked him, and on the same exact day, she (the fitness/friend), sent me an email asking me how I was doing, and that she tried to contact me on facebook but my account had been deleted. Now the thing is, she hadn't spoken to me for almost a month so I felt no need to keep up any conversations with her plus the fact that she's on his facebook friend list, I'm trying to stay NC. Well we got into a brief conversation in email and the link to my website is in my signature. Well before I seemed to be insignificant to her, but I check my stats for my website daily and noticed she was reading my bio page, and on my bio page I talk about my experience and the people I work with, then suddenly I get an email from her all friendly. I'm still on guard and shouldn't have gone any further with communication with her. However she started communicating with me almost daily since finding out about my "experience" with this industry. Well of course being a fitness instructor and I'm trying to lose weight, she started offering fitness advice, then so I let my guard down figuring ok, cool, I can get fitness advice from her, but I stayed at a distance because she's friends with the Narc that hurt me. Well she asked me to call her, and that's when she started talking about all of this stuff and I just remained quiet because as I said I don't want to get in the middle of this. Well I guess she thought we were cool, so she started following me on my business twitter account, and then had the nerve to follow reputable people that I follow on twitter who are also following me. We are not close for her to be following my friends on twitter. And they are all reputable industry people. Something just seems fishy because every time I get steps away from this situation, I get hood-winked and hurt. I don't know the guy she's dating personally, I just knew his brother and what he did to me, so I am not comfortable talking to her, and having her telling me all of their personal business. She even went as far to tell me that all of the brothers have issues and the narc brother that hurt me has a mental problem, but kept saying if the "guy she's dating" knew she were telling me this, he would be highly upset. I know, I know, I broke contact, but just to tell him to tell him to tell his friends to leave me alone. I guess I set myself up.