Karma..........or whatever you want to call it.....:)

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#1 Oct 3 - 1AM
sweetsamm
sweetsamm's picture

Karma..........or whatever you want to call it.....:)

Is it bad that i'm looooooving the fact that my Narc's livelihood,income,and money are all depending on if I decide to write a letter to child support on his behalf......is it bad that i'm smiling right now thinking about him driving without a valid license because it's suspended for nonpayment of childsupport,is it bad that the thought of him being embarassed and pulled off of a jobsite if i decided to call the contractor's board and let them know his contractors lic is suspended,is it bad that seeing him in handcuffs behind bars,begging for me to get this little matter straightened out makes me want to go dancing.......i'm pretty busy next week,and the following week i think i may be out of town,oh well,i'm sure he'll understand if i wait 3mos like he did before PAYING me my daughter's support money,while i was scraping together dimes and nickels for gas,foodstamps for food,medi-cal for our daughter to get her strep throat treated.....or how bout when my car was repo'd infront of my parents house,our daughter watching me beg and cry for the man to not take my car(he did anyway),I am going to dangle this carrot infront of his face the same way he dangles child support infront of my face every month,while he's on his 600dolllar mo. boat,or riding his two new 6000dollar quads...it was only a matter of time,before karma was gonna kick his ass...Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah

Oct 4 - 1AM
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Why success and happiness are REALLY the best revenge!

Wanting to "one up" the N/P is a temptation. I KNOW the ex-Psych professor imagined me homeless, penniless in the gutter, all because of his almighty wrath... only to find out (yes from me, yours truly) that I had found not one, but THREE editors who enjoyed my writing and that I was living in an earthly paradise... BTW, still am. It's easy to want to return anger with anger, and so on. They DO want us to look crazy. And crazier than them. It's kind of hard for them to swallow when a former victim parades her happiness. Imagine my ex-P when he found out the news... me being published... being anything BUT unemployed. Living in a tourist trap again (I had been in New Mexico, but the California Wine Country ain't shabby either) If I had dragged the ex-P to court.. it could've been a losing battle. He could've charmed everyone as the poor victim of a student's amorous attentions, a principled vegetarian stuck with a bunny boiler. Success and happiness are REALLY the only way to go. I know he has a fragile ego... I missed it... so I perfected my aim.
Oct 3 - 2PM
Briseis
Briseis's picture

If what you are feeling is

If what you are feeling is baaaaaaaaaaad then we're all bad :D Thing is, it's the right thing to do. If he's not paying child support as the divorce decree says, then he's breaking the law, period. All the other stuff . . . the gloating and smirking . . . I'm telling you from personal experience, it is NEVER as satisfying as it looks like before you take action. In fact, it will inevitably come back on you. If he loses his job then he CAN'T pay child support, for instance. So reporting him is the RIGHT thing to do. But hoping it will be the ultimate revenge is going to disappoint you. When I was still living in that little town with my Narc banging all those crank skanks and trying to sneak up on the property, I reported him to the sheriff for every little thing he did. He had a warrant for his arrest I got in the mail, and I gave it to the sheriff. He got his driver's license suspended? I called the sheriff and gave them the notice. I heard he was buying alcohol for minors? Selling methamphetamine at the local pub? I called the sheriff. I'm telling you I did EVERYTHING I could, and each time I hoped so hard it would crush and destroy him. It never did. I was disappointed, every time. Somehow, when we try to exact karma, it just doesn't work like we want it to. And then we feel disappointed. So report him, yes. For your daughter's sake. As for the rest of it . . . don't expect much, for your OWN sake :)
Oct 3 - 1AM
kiwi10
kiwi10's picture

no way

i'm with you. i'm trying to decide whether to press charges on a two year battery charge just so his life is shit. fuck his ass over.
Oct 3 - 1AM (Reply to #5)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

It's your RIGHT...

You should press charges. He deserves it. NOT doing so basically says "it's your God-given right to treat me like trash." Nothing like former supply becoming vampires on their former suckers!!!* *It's a difficult analogy, since Ns/Ps are more like the living dead. Is it like battling zombies or vampires?
Oct 3 - 1AM (Reply to #6)
kiwi10
kiwi10's picture

really susan? you think i

really susan? you think i should? i got a decent settlement when it comes in. i'm sure i could get some more money off of him though... it would make me feel good...
Oct 3 - 2AM (Reply to #11)
michele115 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Fierflie

I think you should at the very least to make a statement about consequences. Let him explain to his next victim how "false" the charges were. Think of it as a means to make a statement about how abuse should not be tolerated. Too many victims stay silent.
Oct 3 - 11AM (Reply to #12)
sweetsamm
sweetsamm's picture

FIERFLIE press CHARGES

What were your injuries?? Because my ex broke my nose and i went to the emergency room,it was out of my control,and the hospital was obligatated to call the sheriff in...i was bruised from head to toe,nose broken,two broken ribs,broken pinky,ring finger,torn miniscus in my knee,they took pictures...they went over to our house while i was at the emergency room,kicked the door in brought in dogs and arrested him out of bed...he was ordered a jury trial for corporal punishment of a spouse that happened 10mos later. He tried to get me to write letters to get the case dropped,but the DA wouldn't. I had to testify infront of a jury...i hadn't seen the pics of me,and i was in shock when they brought them out while i was on the stand..AND i am so PISSED that i didn't cooperated with the DA..he could have spent up to 5yrs on jail! Luckily,the jury didn't believe my 'story', the pics talked for themselves, and my ex was sentenced to 9mos home arrest,(luckiest day of his life,that is almost unheard for this type of conviction, and 2yrs felony probation....i remember when he was on probation and he wasn't allowed a drop of alcohol in the house,well, probation would randomly show up and search the house,and I would run around hiding my N's alcohol bottles...AGAIN he would have been put right into the slammer,and i was so brainwashed..SO,my advice to you?? PRESS CHARGES!!! He should not get off the hook for beating you! I regret everyday not making him pay for his actions....I've been where you are and i regret it everyday:)
Oct 3 - 1AM (Reply to #7)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Money talks

If you've got proof (like pictures),I say, go for it. You can PROVE it in court. It's hard to argue with pictures of bruised limbs--a lot harder to argue on bruised hearts. I never did take the ex-P professor to court for "intentional infliction of emotional harm" because of legal costs, and the fact he'd probably charm people, painting himself as the noble victim of a love-crazed, nymphomaniac student. I never did take him to the Dean's office. It will feel good to make money off of him. Money is the only thing Ns/Ps really CARE about. (The ex-P was big into money) Hit him where it hurts. Turn him into the human gravy train. Besides, after what he did, it's called justice.
Oct 3 - 1AM (Reply to #8)
kiwi10
kiwi10's picture

i want to but everyone keeps

i want to but everyone keeps telling me i got enough money and i shoudl just let it go because it will keep me tied to him. but if i do it, that sucker's life will be ruined!! the papers will get a hold of it and he will S-C-R-E-W-E-D
Oct 3 - 8AM (Reply to #10)
helldweller
helldweller's picture

fierflie

As someone who had the chance to do the exact same thing and didn't, I can't even tell you if I wish I had. I promised not to press charges against the judge if his brother made him go to counseling, and he did promise. It was a lie. He just promised so I would sign the waiver. I am still bewildered by the fact that he was not held accountable for anything, and obviously I felt that this made him twice as bad as he was. You would think that the chief judge and the others would realize that absued women have a hard time pressing charges agianst their abusers, but he said they just figured I was crazy because a lot of judges have obssessed women trying to win their attention. It's mind boggling. The only thing that changed after he beat me up for trying to look at his phone was that, when he came over after that, he didn't bring his phone anymore. But what would have changed if I'd pressed charges? He would just love/hate me more because of the extra drama, he may have had something really bad done to me (had my daughters taken away, or had something done to my ex husband, who has a criminal record), who knows? The thing I wanted more than anything was for his other girlfriends--or "female friends" or whatever they were to see the headline, and to read "his girlfriend of four years" and also for the foster child to be taken away from him. In truth, most of these women would probably just end up more obssessed with him, fearful that they would lose him to someone else, and they'd probably worship him even more. As far as the foster child goes, I did end up reporting the abuse to child protective services,a nd they said, and I quote: As long as he is not abusing the child, it's not our concern. Endquote.
Oct 3 - 2AM (Reply to #9)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Oh, the old "let it go"

That's bad advice, especially after what you've been through. You have MORE evidence/justification in your case, especially with the DV. It's not vengeance, it's justice. The ex-P would always drone "let it go" and "move on" as to excuse is impotence in apologizing. If your ex-P isn't man enough to face the music and dance... well it's about time. Besides, it gives YOU closure and validation. Don't worry about his life.
Oct 3 - 1AM
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Nothing wrong with helping out the process...

It's true karma kicks in, but it doesn't hurt to give karma some extra help.
Oct 3 - 2AM (Reply to #2)
STSwiss
STSwiss's picture

sometimes karma needs a push

Think of it as doing the next potential (all all other future victims) a good turn. At some point, they need to be stopped. If you can help that process along, then go for it! Web Of Lies - My Life with a Narcissist An honest and emotional account of life with a pathological partner. http://singlemumsal.blogspot.com/ http://www.sarahtateauthor.com/
Oct 3 - 11PM (Reply to #3)
kiwi10
kiwi10's picture

i think some of you asked

i think some of you asked what he did. he beat me with a belt and i was bruised from head to toe for three months. probably about 30-60 times. i just don't remember... but it went on for a long time.