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im sitting here in shock and bewilderment

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#1 Apr 6 - 7PM
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

im sitting here in shock and bewilderment

Fb book has changed the way private messages show. Its now listed by person. So of course his name is listed eventhough he closed his acct. So I looked. It restored messages that I had deleted. There they all were in chronoligical order from the beginning. All the sweet romantic things. How he wanted us to be together again. Sharing stories and events from our past. How he loved and missed me so much. How always loved me still did and always would. How I was the one for him etc...and last week he teels me he's getting married as if I were an acquaintance. Truly heartbreaking....

Apr 6 - 8PM
Happy1
Happy1's picture

SOI

It's sad I know. If you can't bring yourself to delete then try not to read anything. It's too hard right Now. I know if I get triggered by things in the house then I just hide them away for nowcor throw away. I don't like having quick flashbacks of something related to the item and my narc. You're doing great
Apr 6 - 7PM
beamoflight
beamoflight's picture

(((hugs))) I am so sorry.

(((hugs))) I am so sorry.
Apr 6 - 7PM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

SOI

DELETE that garbage, Sorry :(
Apr 6 - 7PM (Reply to #7)
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

I just cant bring myself to

I just cant bring myself to do it. Im not gonna look at it anymore but I just cant do it yet. It comforts me that I wasnt crazy
Apr 6 - 8PM (Reply to #8)
Jewwell
Jewwell's picture

You can delete when you are ready

We are all at different places. I'm sorry for all that he has done to you. Delete when YOU ARE READY.
Apr 6 - 7PM
JMi
JMi's picture

SOI is that still the same if

SOI is that still the same if you have blocked him?? If so thankyou for bringing this up as i will mos def be keeping away from my private msg box :( So sorry u have to be reminded, i switched my old ipod on the other day and it had old emails on it from when i was travelling lastyear and they were filled with all the things u can imagine - 'i just want you back in my bed baby girl blah blah blah ' I know exactly how you feel but you will be able one day to look at such things and realise that those words were empty - he is empty - and his life with bride to be will be empty - its inevitable YOU DO NOT MISS HIM - YOU MISS WHO YOU THOUGHT HE WAS!
Apr 6 - 7PM (Reply to #4)
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

I dont know about the

I dont know about the blocking. He closed his account and they are all there. Just be mindful. Im ok now. It just threw me for a loop. Im not ready to delete them they help me remember that Im not crazy. I didnt make more of it than it was. This man clearly was telling me that he wanted us to get back together and that he was gonna do what it took. His fiance doesnt even have a clue how he is gonna turn her world upside down. Well thats if there even is a fiance. All of my close friends think he is lying and did it for a reaction
Apr 6 - 7PM (Reply to #5)
JMi
JMi's picture

SOI I do know just how u feel

SOI I do know just how u feel tho! A week before N left me for the final time he was at my house telling my parents (his new in-laws)that he couldn't lose me and that he knew he had issues but it was his genetic make up and that he was gonna get us a home to start a family and that he just couldn't possibly lose me.... fast forward 10 days and he's already moved in with OW No wonder we feel like we r goin crazy but then to be reminded of these situations is a blessing as when we re-write them on here it validates all our suspicions I still ask myself sometimes'JMi do u really think he's a N' Then i tell you something like this and it answers my doubts...... As for if yours has a fiance or not - well i hope not because it screams desperation - how pathetic he has to invent such scenarios!!
Apr 6 - 7PM
Sherbear
Sherbear's picture

OMG SOI...

I can't beleive this, but just last night I went back thru my mailbox on FB and found all our old messages too. All the love and words and hope....it was surreal. I honestly haven't looked at them since before August when I went Nc. Truly heartbreaking.....it was sad seeing it, and today I fought back wanting to make any contact with him. I didn't and I won't and I can totally see why NC is sooo important. It's a big mindfu@k. How we could be held so high and then thrown away as if nothing was ever said. Unreal. Can't believe we both did this within a day of each other!! I will jsut take it as a another day of my processing and healing. Thinking of you! xoxo
Apr 6 - 7PM (Reply to #2)
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

I know sherbear. Its truly

I know sherbear. Its truly horrific especially when you have known them from such a young age. I can't yet bring myself to delete them its the only reminder I have that this wasn't all in my head. I can also see how crazy he is you don't go from that to treating someone like an aquaintance. So very sad.... Thinking of you too! Xoxo