I'm not sure if he's narcissist! What do you think?

Hello,

I have just posted my full story in the "My Story" section and need thoughts and advice, please.

I had a brief affair with a colleague last year. It lasted only three months, but six months later, it is still causing me constant confusion and misery.

A search of 'cognitive dissonance' on Google brought me to this site, and I suspect he MIGHT be a covert/introverted narcissist, but I am not sure. Some of the things that make me wonder otherwise are:

1) He is adored by literally everyone at our work, and whom he deals with through work. Is it really possible all those people are wrong about him, and I am the only one who is right?

2) Even though his behaviour at the end of our relationship felt narcissistic, most of the 'pursuing' at the beginning was done by me. Isn't it supposed to be the narcissist who snares the victim, not the other way round?

3) I am a sensitive person with a low self-esteem. Could THIS be the reason for my prolonged trauma over what happened (rather than him being a narcissist?)

4) Narcissists are supposed to lack empathy, and this seems generally true about him. (I have seen him ignore a woman crying next to him for hours when her cat died.) Yet he is very close friends with one person at work, and even cried when that person was having some troubles last year. Isn't that empathy?

I look forward to hearing from you. Thank you in advance.