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Im Angry and Tempted to FREAK on him.

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#1 Jun 9 - 9AM
whatever2009
whatever2009's picture

Im Angry and Tempted to FREAK on him.

Ladies,

I need your support today. I have almost sent him a text message twice this morning. As Ive mentioned numerous times, we have mutual friends so I run into him on occasion. Im best friends with his live in cousin.(I can DEFINETLY tell you, Im so glad Im not where I was with him)

IM ANGRY today. I seen him yesterday in the park with his son. He only came there "he says" to say hi to me. I said hello and then acted indifferent. Just as though he wasnt there. He also looked like shit, which made it easier to walk away.

Im so mad at myself for ever loving him, and I was so mad at myself for saying hello. Anyway, he is "secretly" seeing a girl whom he use to date. She is crazy as well. He D&Dd her and she would still send obsessive texts, and emails to him the whole time we were together. She would also say horrible things about me. She is extreme and just doesnt stop. Now she is also telling people how she "beat" me. WHICH IS INSANE! I wish she would just shutup.

I dont want him and I know this. but I almost sent him a message saying rude things because he thinks he's so smart. He thinks no one has any idea what he is up to. She is telling everyone and he is trying to keep it a secret. At the same time telling EVERYONE how I mean so much to him, it makes me sick.

I actually feel as though I want to fight him. Im so angry I want to fight him!! This is crazy, and the fact they just bounce around makes me SICK! Yesterday I was fine, today im mad. What is my problem, I have read "the other women" post. I have read everything there is too, I do not know why I would even think it acceptable to send him a text. Im glad I didnt. Just venting ladies.

I havent sent anything, but im close too, and then I fight with myself. I cant tell anyone because my friends would tell me too get a life. Which is probably good advice. LOL

Jun 9 - 4PM
whatever2009
whatever2009's picture

I cant shake it.

I have just been MAD all day. The thought of him makes me sick. Would you beleive he sent me a fridge magnet!!!!!!YAAAAAAAAAAAAA, a magnet, he gave it to a friend of mine to give to me. It had a cartoon character from a show we both use to watch. My friend was here earlier dropping off some clothes she borrowed from me, she then said...oh "N" asked me to give this to you. We both stared at each other. She just said, "I dont know, he said you like this stuff" ... WHAT THE HEELLLLL was the point of that!?!?!?!?!?! He is dispicable and I want to kick his ass. I cant shake this feeling today. Thanks to you all for your support, I would have been arrested by now for assult. LOLLOL!! Today is a bad day!
Jun 10 - 4AM (Reply to #9)
ewa
ewa's picture

do not treat it as a bad day

Please, it is not bad day. I also do not like when my exN is contacting me. But it depends how you will look at it. Please try to visualize the worst things he did to you. Best if you sent him the magnet back or just put it into the thrush. He sent it to you because he thought it will be a good idea to play with your emotions this way. He knew what he was doing. They always play on our feelings by bringing the memories of what they were doing together with us ( of course the good memories hehe). It is a good day for you because you have the chance to prove to yourself that you will stay NC and ignore him. Hugs :)
Jun 10 - 6AM (Reply to #10)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

telling yourself the truth

I have told people to take a piece of paper and my 2 lists: 1 side: Nice things he said/ did 2nd side: Terrible things he said/ die make copies - post one on your bathroom mirror so you see it multiple times a day ~~~~~~~~~ Effective Coaching Specifically for Victims of Pathologicals Feelings buried alive never die. - Alice Miller
Jun 9 - 1PM
NoNarcingZone
NoNarcingZone's picture

Temptation

Isn't it repulsive? The N's mere presence can send you emotionally over the edge! Consider WHOM all that ranting is coming from? A woman who is STILL blind to it all. She was previously D & D'd by the N - now she's (discretely) w/him AGAIN. Guess she gave in to all the hovering?!?! Now that she has that Grand Prize of the N solely to herself (so she thinks) - she's eluded of what it is that she has 'beat' you out of...a NARC piece of shit! Hands down - you're the winner 'whatever2009'. Don't even entertain the thought of text/calling him. NO CONTACT is the gut-check or uppercut that you really want to beat him down with! Neither of them have won a damn thing. YOU have US. They (N & OW) have...well, each other. Sucks to be them. The N gets no response/reaction from you! NC!!! ------------------------------------------------ A gamester, the greater master he is in his art, the worse man he is. Francis Bacon (1561-1626)

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"Soldier, don't confuse your rank with MY authority!"

Jun 9 - 1PM
Scoop
Scoop's picture

Oh yes I know the feeling of

Oh yes I know the feeling of wanting to fight them , if only I wasn't 5 foot 3 he would be dead meat by now !I have rage at the moment it comes and goes during the day , let's just remember why we go no contact one of the reasons is because it pisses them off , there is nothing that pisses of a control freak more than loosing comtrol , they hate it , punching his lights out or writing a text is putting them back in the driving seat . My narc I just know is doing his nut in with my no contact , how do I know? I just do , I feel it in the air . There has been a shift in power in the neathers I feel it .what my narc dosnt know is that I am an expert in him , the same way he made a study of me I did him , no contact is the only way to cause them distress . I danced round my living room with glee when I heared he doesn't get out of bed till mid day , his friend tells me his life has gone down the pan since I went nc . Of cause it has I was his feed and now he is starving ..good good ..scoop x
Jun 9 - 10AM
ewa
ewa's picture

Probably

Probably he this girl the same we were all treated by Ns. He made her believe he loves her he loves her but he never did and never will. I can be not right, but i am guessing that if you sent him messages you will be looking the same in her eyes like she looked at yours. And he will just have satisfaction!
Jun 9 - 10AM
passionatebutterfly
passionatebutterfly's picture

keep venting here and stay

keep venting here and stay strong!! He will love that you texted. Give him nothing! Go punch something, scream....get it out! I understand about the OW. I have a psycho one who keeps saying things and doing things to me as well. Don't justify anything she says!!!! Don't do it! take the high road and don't play their sick games. Sending good vibes your way. Jennyxoxo
Jun 9 - 10AM
happydaysahead
happydaysahead's picture

Too funny you should say

About the other woman. My N's OW was crazy too. Stalking him with emails and texts while we were together. She even showed up at my house to take him back with her. And just let me tell you, he LOVED every minute of it. Thought he had 2 women fighting over him. Makes me sick. He is a nobody, but he definitely deserves HER. She is a convicted felon who lost custody of her children. She is still married but lied to the government to get welfare and public housing. Real piece of work. But hey, they deserve each other. Two peas in a pod !! Sorry, did not mean to hijack your post. But in regards to your situation--DO NOT contact him !! It will only be an ego boost for him, even if you tell him he is an asshole !! Be mad, anger is good and part of the healing process. Just don't contact him. Hugs to you !!
Jun 9 - 9AM
Steph
Steph's picture

I am so happy you vented

I am so happy you vented here, instead of on a text sent to him. Please, please, please don't do it. It will not make you feel better or make him feel worse. He will just get satisfaction knowing that he is still affecting you. And he doesn't need to know that. As far as the other girl. She's just doing what she's doing because she's under his spell now, like you were. Be glad he is her problem now. I know this is easier said than done, but there is no other way.... Just ride out your emotions today and vent here but DO NOT send him any texts!!!!!
Jun 9 - 10AM (Reply to #2)
ewa
ewa's picture

exactly

Exactly i think we should not blame this girls. They are in the same shitty situation we have been. Me personally i dont blame any of them. If they keep texting he probably gives them a reason to do it. Normal guy would know how to handle this situation and it would finish quick.