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I think there are just as many female narcs as there are male ones.........

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#1 Oct 27 - 12PM
LuckySpurs's picture

I think there are just as many female narcs as there are male ones.........

I think the stats lie. They always say that male narcs make up 75% of the narc population, but that has to be wrong. Just in my own life, I know of 6 female narcs (3 sets of mother & daughter narcs)and 3 male narcs. So just in my own experience there are twice as many female narcs as there are male ones.

Just some food for thought. What do y'all think? Are the stats wrong?

Oct 28 - 9PM
Susan32's picture

It's all about her

I've worked with a lot of female Narcs. They tend to be histrionic. I had a female coworker accuse me of purposefully shoving her- there was an investigation- and there was ZERO physical contact (yes, there were witnesses) Female Narcs can be more insidious. My maternal grandmother is a histrionic Narc. The ex-Psych would CONSTANTLY accuse me of being a lesbian and a Narc early on... now I realize, his accusations might've been his desires for a partner, that he WANTED a lesbian Narc as a companion. Didn't help that his girlfriend (now wife) was rumored to be a lesbian, very butch. She was emotionless like him. She might be a Narc... I don't know. I didn't spend a significant amount of time with her, so I won't judge because I can't. *dismissed due to lack of evidence*
Oct 27 - 5PM
dulcinea441's picture

Women tend to be diagnosed

Women tend to be diagnosed more often as having histrionic personality disorder, which is very similar to NPD. They may really be the same disorder, but they perhaps appear to be different because of the differing cultural norms that still affect gender roles and behavior in society. Women who act out their pathology with a more "masculine" energy (i.e., who appear as "go-getters" and power-mongers in the traditional masculine mould) may get the NPD diagnosis more often than other women with the same basic pathological disorder, who are instead cast as feminine "histrionics" because their grandiosity and control is channeled through different avenues than those that are typically available to men. Perhaps the ruthless femme fatale who wields her seductive and destructive power insidiously against men (or women) is just a plain narc, though she is called a histrionic. I don't know. That's just my hypothesis.
Oct 28 - 12PM (Reply to #5)
LuckySpurs's picture


I think you are on to something here. I mistakenly thought my former best friend had histrionics but once I delved deeper, it was NPD that nailed her down. She's textbook NPD. 4 out of the 6 females that I believe have NPD or a lot of the traits & red flags of NPD, all love to portray a 'saintly & perfect' image of themselves and their family, when they are, of course, anything but. The other 2 females are very 'masculine'. The daughter has been in and out of jail for spousal abuse & has let every vehicle and home she has owned go into foreclosure on purpose. She makes tons of money but yet she chooses to act out this destructive behavior over and over and over. It's so aggravating because she'll play the victim all the time yet she is no victim. She's 40 and just had to move back in with her parents yet again and has cut off all contact with 2 out of 3 of her children. A pattern she started when she abandoned her first husband and the 2 kids she had with him to go live on the street! Seriously, she made that decision in her 'right' mind, if you can call it that. Actually, when I spell it out NPD might not be her disorder, maybe more like antisocial or borderline might fit her better. Her brother, however, is hands down a NARC of the worst kind. They're also my in-laws. Nice, huh? My sister in law can be scary and we're all pretty sure that the oldest son that she abandoned is a flat-out psychopath. He's very scary! So the cycle continues......
Oct 27 - 2PM
Layla's picture

Abused boys are more likely to become abusers......

...and abused girls are more likely to become abuse victims. Yes, narcissists are roughly 75% male, and 25% female. My abuser is a male, but I am not focused on him any longer. His time is OVER. Now, I focus on ME and ME getting better, he never will. love~ Layla
Oct 27 - 2PM (Reply to #2)
rosedewittbukater's picture

narc ratio

I got the one that defies the statistics and became an abuser instead of a victim...
Oct 27 - 2PM (Reply to #3)
Layla's picture

That's because you are one in a million Rose....

.....hehehe! : )) love~ Layla