I don't like the narc! My list - what's yours??

I don’t like that I never really meant anything to him, yet he meant something to me.
I don’t like that he was a fake. A fraud. A façade. I don’t like that he is incapable of anything REAL.
I don’t like that he manipulated me and I fell for it.
I don’t like how blind I was to him.
I don’t like that I fell so fast and hard for someone that never really existed.
I don’t like how he gave me so much attention, acted head over heels, like he couldn’t get enough of me, only to devalue me. And I didn’t know what hit me when it happened. And all I was told was “it’s been a crazy few weeks.”
I don’t like how he simply idealized and devalued me – ME!
I don’t like that he never saw my REAL BEAUTY.
I don’t like that he was nearly impossible to make plans with, and it was always on his terms.
I don’t like that I never had a say in anything.
I don’t like how he teased me sexually and used sex as a weapon.
I don’t like how selfish he is.
I don’t like how every single time we were together he would say “I don’t have much time.” Like he was this hot commodity and I’d better take it while I can get it.
I don’t like how he would always say “no guarantees” about getting together and almost everything was last minute.
I don’t like how cheap he is.
I don’t like how exploitive he is.
I don’t like his condescending attitude toward others.
I don’t like his attitude toward God.
I don’t like his superiority complex.
I don’t like his lack of humility.
I don’t like how he thinks he’s entitled.
I don’t like how he’s “never wrong.”
I don’t like how I felt like I needed to be perfect in order to keep him.
I don’t like that he used me.
I don’t like how sometimes he talked down to me.
I don’t like that I basically “lived” for his next text or the next time I would see him again. I pined for him daily.
I don’t like that I literally felt addicted to him.
I don’t like that he never fulfilled me. He always left me in want. Yet I fulfilled him – I was his supply. Ew.
I don’t like that he targeted me.
I don’t like that he lied to me.
I don’t like that he doesn’t feel emotions like I do, doesn’t feel guilt like I do. Does not suffer any consequences for his actions.
I don’t like his projection.
I don’t like his gas lighting.
I don’t like the games he would play – even though I said I don’t do games and I don’t do drama.
I don’t like how it seemed that when I would tell him what I like, want, need, he would not deliver. I simply don’t like how much he withheld from me.
I don’t like that he gave me the ST and then would tell me “don’t read into things” or “nothing has changed other than available time” or “I’ve just been unbelievably busy.” I never demanded anything of him to begin with. Just wanted a little consistency and respect.
I don’t like that he fell asleep a few times mid-texting with me. How rude! Just tell me you need to go sleep.
I don’t like his inconsistency.
I don’t like how I felt I couldn’t freely express myself or even really be myself!
I don’t like how easy I made things for him and how he took me for granted.
I don’t like that I jumped at the chance to see him most times. I made myself too easily available to him because if I didn’t I’d never see him.
I don’t like how his actions proved I was not significant or important to him.
I don’t like how he called himself “a complex guy.”
I don’t like how he would contradict himself or deny he said things.
I don’t like how emotionally unavailable he was with me. And how he said if he did fall for me he would never tell me.
I don’t like how prideful and stubborn he is.
I don’t like how he would try to make me jealous. And yet he claimed he didn’t get jealous and if he did he wouldn’t show it.
I don’t like that it seemed he got off on making me wait to see him again.
I don’t like how much he changed in such a short period of time. He went from this blushing, boyish, sweet guy who was nervous around me to aloof and sometimes cocky and arrogant.
I don’t like how he was Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.
I don’t like how he withdrew just when it felt like we were getting closer.
I don’t like what a coward he is.
I don’t like how truly insecure he is and it’s like he thinks in order for people to like him, love him or want him he has to manipulate them. It’s sad and pathetic.
I don’t like how he has the emotional maturity of a 6-year-old boy.
I don’t like that I felt anxious all the time and I never knew where I stood.
I don’t like that I never really knew what he was thinking or doing and I was always left to assume or guess. He was most of the time one big cryptic asshole. Never forthcoming and spoke narcspeak a lot!
I don’t like that I essentially could not have expectations.
I don’t like that my thinking ended up just wishful thinking.
I don’t like how he wanted my openness, but he wasn’t willing to reciprocate much.
I don’t like that he only threw me crumbs. Slightly larger in the beginning, but still crumbs.
I DO NOT LIKE BEING THE OW!! UGH!!
I don’t like that here I thought we were both just good, honest people, that fell into something neither of us planned for. When in actuality he has probably done this before and lied to me (and them) about it. And he studied me and targeted me – so he planned for it!
I don’t like playing second fiddle to anyone and it was my fault I ever entered into the relationship. How naïve could I be?
I don’t like being treated like an option. Period.
I don’t like that I compromised my values and integrity. It made me so miserable.
I don’t like that he is a freaking DISORDERED NARCOPATH who left me in a constant state of want, confusion, anxiety, insecurity and obsessiveness. Wow - who was I and where did I disappear to for a while?
I don’t like that I forsook my self-worth and my dignity for him.
I don’t like that most of the time I felt CHEAP. Come to think of it he would have been more honest leaving money on the bedside table for me. Urghhhh.

And I simply DO NOT like that it was always, drum roll please - ALL ABOUT HIM!!!!!

Now why is it I “danced” with this guy for 7 months? Amazing to think in such a short period of time how this one man impacted my life in such a way. I never knew what narcissism really was until him for God’s sake!

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