i dont know how to get back on track

I was doing so well and then wham he dropped the bomb. While I'm not in a pile of ashes, I feel a bit lost. I just don't know what to do to get back on track.

neverlookback's picture

get back on track right where you left of. You dont move back with your progress, you just keep on moving forward, you were only momentarily off track. This is a perfect example of how ANY contact with them is so very damaging and toxic to us and our recovery. I wish the bastard would NEVER have found a way to contact you, you didnt falter HE caused this set back to happen You are STILL doing GREAT it just doesnt seem like it in your head. Sometimes this can test our recovery, (even though its way too soon) you stood strong and you did well but it also evoked some deep hurts this man caused in your life. I would have reacted the same way you did if mine did that, you are only human sickofit give yourself some credit where credit is due. He once again caused confusion in your mind and they LOVE to do that. Guess what you learned though? You learned how damaging contact is, even though he contacted you, and I hope we can all learn from what you have gone through - its a knife to our heart when they contact us and or we contact them. Get back on the track, he is still a sick man nothing has changed in that aspect but YOU have changed, you can remove yourself from his hold he once had on you. x0x0x0x0
dazed and seeking peace and strength's picture

This happens a lot with me since mine keeps on hoovering and I keep on find out more secrets. I have been getting better and better at getting back on track. A lot had to do with being plain "sick of it" :) --> sorry bad pun on your username, but it's true. I think about the grand scheme of things as well - the more distance and time that comes between us, the more the balance shifts towards taking care of my own life and my own needs. When the balance shifts that way, I begin to think about how insignificant "one more bomb from the N" becomes. And I look forward again. The bombs that he throws at me, I just toss behind me and continue to march forward. Sounds cheesy, but I don't know how else to describe it. You will get back on track. He IS dropping bombs to throw you off your healing track. Stay strong, look ahead at what you want for yourself, imagine what positive things you want for yourself in your life ahead of you. I doubt he is in that picture. Stay strong and don't beat yourself up for feeling like you are off track. You are doing the best that you can, and healing is a process. Hugs.
Jewwell's picture

I understand your pain. I am trying this and I find that it often helps. Live in this moment and this moment ONLY. Today, I was in beautiful San Francisco with my parents and I tried (I really tried) to FULLY concentrate on the moment. It "frees" my brain of the N.
gettinbetter's picture

Yes jewell I was just talking about that. I spend most of my thoughts in the past or in the future. Constantly thinking about what happened or what might happen in the future but rarely in the present. A couple of weeks ago I was beginning to focus on myself and being in the present and he ruined it which I'm sure was his intention