I am really struggling today

I've added my story.
It was very helpful but I am struggling today to not reach out to him. I really want to hear his voice and feel his touch. I want to believe that 2 weeks ago when I was breaking up with him and he said that he really thought that I was the one... that he meant it.
I can't help feeling that if I give him one more chance that he will have changed. That he will have the love that he has promised me for so long.
That he will be honest with me this time and not so distant. That the relationship will actually be normal this time.
I miss him today more than ever.