Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark
Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark
"A man who commits adultery lacks judgment; whoever does so destroys himself."
Proverbs 6:32
I have such concern and worry for my children and what is to come with the ending of my marriage. I awake each day and they are my strength and motivation to not dwell in my heartache, not to lay in bed in grief or fall into depression. They are the reason I am able to go on in my day to day duties and still smile - just for them, it is a genuine smile. When they were born, each child brought so much love into my life, each one expanded my heart more and more. Nothing feels the same for me except for the deep love for them and desire to protect them. I pray so often God will guide me to do what is best for their future. I pray God will help them through this in His own way, that they will not blame me for divorcing their Dad, because they are simply too young to understand what has happened. And my heart hurts for me too because I have retained my attorney and I have begun the divorce process.
I have not shared any of this with him. I will not inform him of my plans and he will not be consulted. Once he leaves the home, all communication will be through the attorney or 3rd party. He will not be allowed direct communication with me. The divorce papers will be surprise to him because he assumes I will consult him on my plans. He will find himself in a different world of his own making now. I will no longer be available to communicate with a liar. I am seeking full custody and want him removed from the home. I know this will be painful for my kids, but I am certain this is what is necessary now. I can't stand being in the same home with him, even rooms away, I hate running into him in the hall and cooking meals that he eats. I never join in the meals , but these are the last meals my kids have with their father and I will let them have the few that are left. I cry for me and them, I know this will be so hard for them to understand because their father has devastated me too!!
Thank you all so much for your heartfelt comments and concern for me and my family. Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you.
My Mother read the majority of the book of evidence of the affair and I have sworn I will not go back and review this since it is so painful. I can not change what happened, I have to turn my back on him in every way. This evidence is overwhelming supportive in my favor for the divorce and custody issues and my attorney feels confident that I will get what I am asking for, along with child support.
I will leave it to him to tell his own story, I will not be explaining this to fiends or his family, if I am asked, I will tell them to give him a call and ask him, he can speak for himself.
I want him to leave our home!! I resent every part of his being, his clothing, anything of his I just want to toss in the trash. I contain my urges of petty vengeful acts. He has called my cell phone 5 times today and I will not answer to him again. I did not even check to hear what he had to say in his voice mails. I just don't care, I am no longer available to him. I have left our room, and moved all my clothes from the closet. I took everything out of my bed side table. He has no idea until he goes to sleep tonight that I have left our room. I will tell the kids that Daddy's snoring keeps mommy awake all night and so I have so sleep in the other room.
I will not go in circles tying to understand or figure out the why of his poor choices, it is a waste. He did not love me or my children enough or the family we created to control himself or to live up to the standards he boasted so much that he possessed. He is a fraud. He is unworthy of us. And, we are better off without him in our lives.
Blessings to you all.
Thank you so much for letting me share here, your concern, caring and prayers.
"Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let
God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think.
Then you will learn to know
God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect."
Romans 12:2
"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."
John 14:27
NLW
The way you are making such a
I've read your other posts.
I am pretty close to where
the children
I am impressed with the
shattered
You are very strong. You are