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  5. He contacted me, Im freaking tired of this bullshit!!

He contacted me, Im freaking tired of this bullshit!!

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#1 Feb 5 - 1PM
HardToBelieve
HardToBelieve's picture

He contacted me, Im freaking tired of this bullshit!!

IM TIRED OF HIS BULLSHIT. IM TIRED OF IT. IT HAS TAKEN MY MIND, BODY AND SOUL WITH SWEAT AND BLOOD TO RESIST TEMPTATION AND NOT CONTACT HIM BACK DESPITE HIS EVER ONGOING BULLSHIT THESE PAST 3 MONTHS. NOW HE CONTACTS ME AGAIN AFTER A LONG BREAK... SAYING THAT HE IS THINKING OF ME.

I need to vent here because if I don't do it here Im gonna end up writing him back. Im tired of this. I want to move on with my life, thats what Im doing. Why can't he just do the same and forget about me? Do I honestly need to spell it out for him again that I dont want him in my life anymore? How retarded can one be to not get the message?

I sadly wish somedays something bad would happen to him.. getting injured, ill, or better yet killed. So I don't have to be stalked by him anymore.

Im so tired of this.

Feb 5 - 6PM
HardToBelieve
HardToBelieve's picture

Thanks. But does NC show Im affected?

Thanks for all the replies, it's always empowering to read. I blocked his email so I will now no longer have to recieve any stupid emails from him. I feel better already but also orried. What if blocking him will make him even more determined because after blocking he definitely knows it's been affecting me because his emails won't be delievered anymore. I tried to leave the phone calls and the emails for months to show that I can't be bothered by it, but it takes it toll after a while to see someone repeat the same behavior when I moved on long time ago. So I've changed my number and blocked my email now. Now what? I can't take more stalking. When does it ever end after total and complete NC? I don't use Twitter or any of those accounts. I closed mine when I went NC. Im not affiliated with his family anymore and he is not with mine either. What more is there to come of this? I've basically done everything I can now. When does it freaking end from here?
Feb 6 - 7AM (Reply to #10)
janemarie
janemarie's picture

Stay in control!!

Deep breath.... now that youve blocked him from everything...he may show up at your door....YOU DONT HAVE TO OPEN IT!!!!!!!! Then if he persists....make a nice phone call to the police....unless he has it "in" with the police...they are usually intimidated by authority such as this....DO IT!! It will show him you mean business!!! Plus you will begin police reporting to possibly use for your benefit in the future if needed.... Take every step you need to...this is YOUR life he is messing with,,.He will only continue if you allow it!!! Will he EVER stop?? Who knows? But if he doesnt...it will not be as persistant and as crazy....he may just try every now and then to "test the waters"..... Stay in control....you made a huge step here....keep going girlfriend!!!! xoxo
Feb 5 - 9PM (Reply to #9)
Armed
Armed's picture

He won't know that he's been

He won't know that he's been blocked. He just won't get a response and that's what he's after anyway. Let him send all he wants, you'll never see it and you can move on with your life. Armed
Feb 5 - 7PM (Reply to #8)
Winter
Winter's picture

HardToBelieve

First of all it does not matter what your NC "shows" to him. You really do it for you. He can take it the way he wants. What you want is to be free and out of this emotional turmoil. The rest doesn't really count. This is first. Second. What is wrong with being affected? We are not robots and yes, we got affected if someone treates us the way we dislike. As a consequence of a bad treatement we take decision to ignore the person because any interaction with him is unpleasant and does not bring anything good to us. Talking with them or explaining them things does not help. So we decide that the person does not deserve our attention and we go NC. This is how I look at this. Keep strong. I know you get triggered, the longer you are on the path, the less triggered you get. Love Winter
Feb 5 - 3PM
Armed
Armed's picture

He somehow senses that you're

He somehow senses that you're bothered by it and telling them not to contact you only makes it worse. Don't engage!!! If you don't feel you will be strong enough to ignore him just block all means of contact. I did this in the beginning and eventually unblocked just out of curiosity. I guess I needed proof that he really was a narc and sure enough him and all his stupid emails confirmed it. It's actually pathetic to see how crazy and disordered they really are. I needed that to confirm my thoughts and it made me feel better. Now that I'm stronger and able to accept what he is it's easier for me to just read and ignore. It's soothing because I had to get it in my thick skull. There is no more doubt. He's like my own little personal psych project. It's really interesting to observe these people and their pathology. Some are a bit more complex but they all are pretty textbook if you pay close enough attention. One day you will feel sorry for him but not the way he wants you to. You will pity him for not being able to feel like a normal human being and like Shakespeare wrote, it is better to love than to not have loved at all. This they will never experience. NEVER!!! My narc emailed me inviting me on a vacation abroad...the dumb ass can't even leave the country. See how full of crap they are? Block him and regain your strength, they do not stop. Their lives are like old sitcom plays. They may do well for a spell but it's short lived. They will find new women, charm them and soon she we be in your place. They are sick. Their lives are cursed. So leave the damned narc to bask in his own misery. Lol
Feb 5 - 3PM
kartaga
kartaga's picture

he is not respecting you by

he is not respecting you by doing this. the only way you can show him you deserve respect is NC. he will take even an insult as a sign of attention and he will win whatever you write back.
Feb 5 - 2PM
GeorgiaGirl
GeorgiaGirl's picture

Ok, you are tired of it but

his "communication" somehow got thru. Have you blocked phone, emails, texts, facebook, twitter, myspace, etc? Have you told mutuals that you don't want to hear ANYTHING AT ALL about him? And just because you get something from him (if you've done all of the above and he still manages to breach your defenses) then you are certainly NOT required to read it. Delete, delete, delete. Simple as that.
Feb 5 - 2PM
janemarie
janemarie's picture

Rules of NC!!!!

When establishing rules with yourself when it comes to setting up NC...you MUST do it all from every angle, otherwise it is NOT true NC!!!! NC means you ignore every one of their attempts to contact you....that means not only do you NOT answer the door, but you BLOCK them from phone, email, fb pages, every way they can get in touch with you!!!! Everything MUST be blocked... Unfortunately if he/she happens to be the other parent to your children you have to have some contact...we call that LC(low contact), only emails or texts reguarding the children and when he/she doesnt obey....DELETE BUTTON!!!!! BLOCK...IGNORE....DELETE!!!!! This is our life now....but it will get better!! xoxo
Feb 5 - 3PM (Reply to #3)
midnight7
midnight7's picture

Janemarie

Some of us do all the above. I changed every single contact detail, blocked from the new and have never been on fb in my life - didn't stop the xN, he just wrote a letter instead - you can't stop those. I shredded it.
Feb 5 - 2PM
midnight7
midnight7's picture

Really understand

Really understand HardToBelieve, have told my xN several times not to contact me again. Despite my ending it, telling him to get on with his life, and changing all phone/email details, he wrote to me last week - so frustrating. It's exhausting. It feels as if it will never be completely over. Let's hope with enough NC time they'll eventually lose interest. Actually posted about it: http://www.lisaescott.com/forum/2012/02/04/always-wait-24-hours-remember-breathe