Good article on Sociopaths and how they target us

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#1 Aug 22 - 5AM
Klarity Belle
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Good article on Sociopaths and how they target us

Aug 22 - 2PM
imabloke
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Sums it all up..

Excellent article... exactly how i felt... shit! The discarding is awful. Past behaviour predicts future behaviour seems to be my mantra at the moment, as i try and make sense of it.
Aug 22 - 3PM (Reply to #10)
Susan32
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Past behavior predicting future behavior

I remember telling a friend after the D&D that I wasn't my ex-Psych's last victim (nor was I the first) That sickened me, since he had treated me terribly. The emotional abuse. And being discarded by one's TEACHER for the "sin" of being human... that's disgusting. I secretly hoped my ex-P's fiancee was as narcissistic as him, so at least she'd be a real soulmate for him. And that she'd dish out to him what he had given. I did feel like cr@p during the D&D. I was merely a student... so I pity his students, not him. No more pity for him.
Aug 22 - 1PM
almostlydia
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Excellent article. So

Excellent article. So perfectly summed up in every way. I'm going to send this to some people I think. One of the traits that I have made my immediate red flag when I see or hear about someone is their 'charm'. I had decided some time ago that anytime someone comes across as bigger than life, with all the charisma to light up a room, I would take ten steps back. This just nailed that for me. I love it when I figure something out on my own and find out it was exactly right:) Seems obvious now, to be suspicious of people like this but I really never knew before. Judging by all the people I know that still think he walks on water, apparently they still don't know. Thanks for posting this! almostlydia

almostlydia

Aug 22 - 12PM
Kelly
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Klarity Belle

This was great! Thanks :)
Aug 22 - 9AM
Goldie
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Very Accurate

for what I went through with my X. He is a classic N/P. He said all the words in the article and he is not much of a reader so they just kind of naturally figure out how to manipulate as well as they do. He told me we were the same and he never loved anyone else like me and he would never leave me and never cheat on me. That I was beautiful and sexy and he told me that he loved me all the time. Oh boy, looking back on it now it seems so ridiculous. Most everyone could see it but me. Funny when he began the D&D those were the first things to go, it was then how I did not understand him and I was ugly and old and that he was going to cheat on me and leave me and had never loved me and was just using me the whole time. Those were the real words the truth. When the mask came down everything was the opposite. I can remember going into utter shock and it took me 4 more months to get him out after this because I was waiting for the old M to come back. He tried unsucessfully a few more times to pretend as he had in the past but by then the mask was down and I began to look at him with disgust. Honestly the strangest thing I ever went through. My love for him turned to repulsion and this is when I felt like I was falling apart and it took everything I had inside of me to get him out. I felt like I was dying inside and I barely had any energy left to cope with his non stop barage of lies, games, manipulations, and confusion. Once he knew I was done he kicked it all up a few notches and basically refused to leave. He became even more violent and angry. We had to call the police several times until he was finally removed for good and held without bail so he at long last could not return. This is when the real fun began, he put his mask back on for the court system and began the serious D&D of me to them to try and win his case. He basically lied about EVERYTHING and I was like: Are you kidding me? I thought for awhile that he was going to get off cuz his lies are so convincing. I saw them looking at me like they thought I was crazy. I kept wondering what he was telling them and when I found out, I was mortified. He told them I was a drug user (i'm not) and crazy and that I made all this up and all he was trying to do was love me. He still got jail time so who knows what they believed. This man dearly destroyed my life and me and it all happened so fast in only 7 months. I just realized that he is most likely going to serve that much time in jail. Interesting thought. He will be locked up in prison for all the days that he kept me locked up in prison here in my own home, not literally but certainly figuratively. Wow!! The funny thing was that I was studying abnormal psychology in school at the same time I was with him and I would come home from school and say: Hey M, so many of these disorders sound just like you. You sound like you are a Narcissist with Antisocial, Oppositional Defiant Disorder, Post Tramatic Stress, Obsessive compulsisve Disorder with Borderline features and drug and alcohol addiction. He had severe fear of abandonment and love addiction which made him difficult to diagnois. He would cry and come back which is unusual for a typical sociopath because they normally would not want to get caught, yet this man's lack of impulse control was so severe that he appeared to be unable to stop himself, yet he has absolutley no conscience. The shrinks would have a field day with this one. I thank God every day that I made it out alive. Towards the end when he knew I was done, he had a look in his eyes when he got violent like he wanted to take me down. Scary stuff, if you are with someone like this or you think someone is like this run run run as fast as you can. God bless, Goldie
Aug 22 - 8AM
Bodhi
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Great article

two years after the beakup and I'm still wondering what the heck happened!
Aug 22 - 7AM
anonymous
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Gaslighting

Excellent article. "...if an abusive person says hurtful things and tries to convince you that you are mentally unstable and starts recommending that you get professional help, you might be in the presence of a gaslilghter." Goes along with what we've all been saying about gaslighting. I had forgotten that my P/N recommended professional help to me a couple of times. But he didn't need it. Yet he laid waste to many people, not just women, in his life and knew it. Said he should "work on it" but didn't "know how". Definitely a gaslighter.
Aug 22 - 8AM (Reply to #2)
Susan32
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Recommending "professional help"

That's how my ex-Psych professor started our "relationship." I had recently lost my grandfather, I was grieving, and he sent me to the onsite counselor. He DID say hurtful things, then told me that I needed to "learn to manage my feelings." What made my ex-P different was that he had been put in a mental institution by his parents as a child... because his parents KNEW he was the one with problems.
Aug 22 - 6PM (Reply to #4)
anonymous
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Institutionalized as a child

Yes Susan, the P/N in my life (I refuse as of this day forward to refer to him as *my* P/N anymore), was hospitalized twice, at age 15, then 16 for manic episodes. It was then that he was diagnosed as bi-polar. They put him on Prozac but he didn't like the way it made him "feel". So when he got to college, he started self medicating with nicotine, caffeine and pot, all in large doses on a daily basis. A regimen he maintains to this day and he's now 36. But I was the one who needed "professional help". HA! I hadn't even recognized his telling me that I needed help as gaslighting until reading this article. The bastard had me so mind-F'd that he sounded perfectly logical and sane when he said I needed help but he didn't. Glad I can see clearly now.
Aug 22 - 11AM (Reply to #3)
Janet
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I bonded with N/P on a cross

I bonded with N/P on a cross country flight. Moved across the country 1.5 months later! Sheeeeeeeeesh. Peace. J

Peace. J