1. Home
  2. Forums
  3. Narcissist Forums
  4. The Path Forward Forum
  5. ex Narc boyfriend engaged

ex Narc boyfriend engaged

7 posts / 0 new
Last post
#1 Feb 6 - 4PM
smarternow
smarternow's picture

ex Narc boyfriend engaged

Just hear he is engaged to the woman he cheated on me with. Strangely freeing to thing that he really is someone else's problem for real, along with some dismay. What did you think when yours got engaged? Its been 3 years and I'm not in a new relationship yet. But working on it.

Feb 8 - 11AM
strongerthanever
strongerthanever's picture

My exNarc got engaged 9

My exNarc got engaged 9 months after our breakup and married her 2 months later. From what I heard, he was already making his moves on her and "being friendly" at their work when he was still living with me 2 months prior to the breakup. They only dated 6 months seriously before marrying. For a guy that has had relationships, many short-term and a few long (me 3 yrs, one girl 5yrs, another 2yrs), he married this one pretty quickly. in two weeks is their 1 yr anniversary. I am still in shock and hurt by this since he proposed twice to me. I know it is her problem now but, she has two young girls and couldnt or even wouldnt try to bond with my son.
Feb 8 - 10AM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Smarter

10 bucks says they never make it to the alter. Why worry about it? Better her than you. She just entered the spin zone. Poor thing. Move forward, don't look or inquire. Ignorance is bliss. Idealk
Feb 7 - 8PM
agnesmurphy17
agnesmurphy17's picture

I felt sorry for her

I left mine. He had no new woman when I left but got one with a few moments. Apparently, he was in love again within one to two weeks. Talking marriage within three months. Engaged by ten months. They broke up about two weeks after their engagement. He & I were divorced about a month thereafter. I was happy he had a new woman. kept him a way from me. And I was sad for her because I knew she was gonna get abused. And she was -- that's why she left him too.
Feb 7 - 9PM (Reply to #4)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Feeling sorry for the OW...

The ex-Psych professor's long-distance girlfriend moved from LA to New Mexico to be with him. Like Aceone, her relationship with him was primarily over the phone, via email... in a way, more distant than mine. I was in the same city, at least :0 She gave up her job at LACMA for him (the largest art museum in the western US, pretty prestigious) Nevertheless, the ex-P still hoovered me after she moved in with him, so I acted as if he didn't exist. I felt sorry for the OW when I met her because he physically abandoned her while I was talking to her. I had a nice, civilized conversation with her... it wasn't a cat fight... and the ex-P fled down the stairs. I saw the puzzlement in her eyes when she looked for where he was, and he was halfway down the stairs, he had run so fast. The ex-P emotionally abandoned me; he physically abandoned the woman who had moved to a new state&given up her job to be with him. It was painful to watch.
Feb 7 - 7PM
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture

smarternow

I have been 2 years out and nobody in my life but am moving to an other state and hoping I can find someone to have a friendship there and see what happens.My fondest wish is to be in a healthy relationship this time around!
Feb 6 - 4PM
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Some sense of relief

The ex-Psych professor NEVER told me he already had a girlfriend in Los Angeles, even when I had declared my love to him. He even had the nerve to hoover me after I had met said girlfriend. He flaunted his girlfriend right after I had told him about the death of one of my friends. Strangely, he and the girlfriend acted (and looked) more like fraternal twins than boyfriend/girlfriend. No hand holding. No PDAs. During the final D&D, I had been a weeping, upset mess. After I met the girlfriend, I was suddenly strutting serenely around campus. I had come to the tipping point. I saw her as my cue to exit (despite the fact he begged me for my home address&phone number) I wasn't angry at her. She looked like me. She had a lovable nerdiness. I didn't see her as a rival, but a sister. My total lack of jealousy when I met the girlfriend ended up giving the ex-P a migraine I think. Not that I'd mind *shrugs* I told the ex-P that he WANTED a cat fight between the girlfriend and I, and I made a snide remark about the mud wrestling pit at the upper dorms. I congratulated on the ex-P being engaged (he might not have been engaged at all, at the time)... and he threw a total hissy fit while I kicked back with a smug superior smile on my face. I acted as relaxed as if I had a pina colada on an Acapulco beach. He threw a fit, saying I was engaging in personal imposition&violation... by then I DID NOT CARE. He angrily told me to stop smiling... so I gave the Cheshire Cat grin. The ex-P wanted to emulate Prince Andrei in "War and Peace" who keeps his engagement to Natasha private. A year after the D&D, the ex-P married his girlfriend when she was in her third trimester. They might not have gotten engaged till she was pregnant. It helps to be psychic on top of being empathetic.