I feel like in everyday consciousness i am slowly but surely starting to understand what has happened to me and the years of D&D, lies and cheating and finally him leaving me for OW.
I have been NC 4 1/2 months yet they live nearby and i do worry i'l see them as i think that emotionally i will be back to square one - i'm still physically attracted to my N and he is the only man i have ever been with (11 year relationship from the age of 17)
Here's the problem, every night without fail i dream of him or even worse both of them (she was a good friend of mine) It can be anything from being at the same party to our wedding day over again ( we got married December!!) to him begging me back................
Whatever the dream, i wake up sad and disappointed at the fact i'm obviously still obsessing about him in my head and i don't know what to do :(