Do they ever admit it's all about them?

Do N's sometimes admit that it is them that create the relationship breakdown? Mine gave the classic 'its not you, it's me' line when I suggested we call it quits after he had beeen showing the classic signs;

- whirlind romance online (complete love bombing - 'princess, beautiful, perfect, you're special, I really care about you, really want a relationship' blah blah blah)
- then began the criticisms, put-downs and nit picking
- devaluing (red flags from the beginning but now seem glaringly obvious - very controlling, holding off intimacy on purpose, judging my friends, VERY insecure about his manhood and performance in the bedroom, past relationships had never been his fault - he was 'treated badly'. Many more to mention!)
- blowing hot and cold when I lost my dad suddenly, despite saying the right things, the actions didn't catch up (a common theme looking back!)
- completely unable to be there for me when I needed him and had a self-pity overwhelming him about 'his life, i.e. work/money' and was 'angry with the world'.
- After I criticised him about not seeming to care, he began to discard with all the meaningless 'sorry's'. I just knew he wasn't there with me. Like he was outside looking in.
- Said he needed to sort his life out, ,not wanting a relationship, but tried to hoover me with a pathetic text 'my life is so shit it's really getting me down' (yes, two weeks to the day after my dad died!)
- Admitted he was selfish but did not seem to actually understand it or change it.
- He was back online within two days of hoovering and had met someone else less than a week who he is now in a full blown relationship with 3 weeks after discarding me. Poor girl.

So, do some N's have this 'woe is me' and self-pity about them that comes through when they aren't centre of attention? He seemed to want me to focus and chase him when I was in raw grief over my lovely father. I couldn't believe the audacity and pure self centredness. He then moved on like I was nothing and is no doubt love bombing someone else, whilst telling her how wrong I was for him. It makes me feel physically sick.