Broke NC after 2 months...
Broke NC after 2 months...
Yesterday morning I was so proud of myself, I was celebrating TWO MONTHS of NC. He hasn’t contacted me since final D&D, so I didn’t have to worry about ignoring any of his phone calls or texts, which has made it so much easier on me. But still, in two months I hadn’t given him any clue as to what was going on my life by contacting him. And then, last night….. I was at a concert and having an amazing time. I was dancing with my friends to the band, and I accidentally hit my ear, and I felt my diamond earring fall out. He had bought me those earrings for Christmas. I was SO upset, it was the only materialistic thing I had left from our relationship, and I wore them every single day. I went to the bathroom cause I just needed to cry (..I had a few drinks, so I was a little more emotional than normal haha) and then what did I do?! AFTER TWO MONTHS of doing so well, I texted him from the bathroom. Stupid, Stupid, Stupid. I didn’t even think about what I was doing, I wrote “ugh, just lost a diamond earring :( ” The second I hit ‘send’ a huge feeling of regret consumed me, then I cried a little more in the stall because a) I was so pissed at myself for contacting him, b) I lost the only thing I had left of him, and c) I was letting the thoughts of him ruin my great night. I just prayed he wouldn’t text back, realistically I knew he wouldn’t, and of course he never did. I’m just so frustrated because he completely washed his hands of me when I did everything for him and loved him so deeply. I don‘t even exist to him anymore, yet he still consumes my mind. So, this morning I took him, his sister, and his mother out of my cell so I don’t have another unexpected mishap. Back to day 1 of NC. Trying to look on the bright side, and at least I didn’t say I missed him or that I still think of him every day.
I read on here everyday, and I truly believe I wouldn’t have made it that long without all of your words of wisdom, I owe so much to all of you, so Thank You!! A little set back, but I’m going to keep going forward!
No Harm No Foul
I know that it must hurt to lose a diamond earring....
Thanks Michele, I had no clue
NC is hard when you have kids
I agree with that statement!
LLL
at least he didn't reply!
It happens