The Book Of False Truths - why we stay

Why? Because of a tainted "belief system"

*We dont believe this disorder is real
*We believe they dont have this disorder
*We believe their false acts of kindness and goodness
*We believe the words that are meaningless
*We believe them when they tell us something did not happen that actually did happen
*We believe every lie
*We believe he is just different or mis understood
*We believe its "Love" because they keep us around
*We are unable to find solid proof that is good enough in our minds to leave
*We believe he is special and unique
*We believe his justifications for his actions
*We ignore red flags to avoid the pain of the truth
*We accept that this is our life
*We over shower them with kindness thinking this will make a change
*We dont believe that what they are doing is abusive
*We love them and are willing to take abuse regardless
*We are afraid to believe that a good life exist outside of life with them
*We believe we are worthless
*We believe no one will love us
*We believe we cant survive without their help
*We believe we will never get someone as good as them
*We believe our situation is different than others here and therefore will work itself out

We may believe all of this, but one thing that is inevitable, the truth will come knocking one day. This book of beliefs that you have held on to with a death grip will be meaningless. This is the only thing that is not a belief but a fact.

justicejones's picture

Thank you, Betty for this cold, hard, truth!
peaceatlast's picture

All of it sooo true but especially the very last one which i think is possible the most dangerous one to believe.... that our particular situaion is different and that things will work themselves out. That is the killer one because despite the endless abuse and pain we really don't want it to be true. it is shocking and life shattering when we finally realise nothing will ever change. This board has helped me to be strong and to finally walk away without looking back. Thank you.xx
Used's picture

We may believe all of this, but one thing that is inevitable, the truth will come knocking one day. This book of beliefs that you have held on to with a death grip will be meaningless. This is the only thing that is not a belief but a fact. thankyou for this, the truth did come knocking and i couldnt ignore it any more, no more denial.. this board and lisa and you and mods and freinds i found on it, gave me the biggest learning curve of my life. I HEEDED IT AND WILL CONTINUE YOU TO DO SO. WITH ALL MY GRATITUDE AND THANKS TO YOU ALL...xxxxxx
onwithmylife's picture

I cannot say anything else to what you wrote, as their are tears in my eyes, for it is ALL SO TRUE, thanks for posting this....this list is as great as the one how to tell he is a NARC.............