ANGRY, anger and more anger

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#1 Oct 11 - 12AM
emtg
emtg's picture

ANGRY, anger and more anger

I woke up on Friday and something had changed the way that people on the forum said it would. It was like a switch went on and I saw the world a little differently, a little lighter, and not as hopeless as before. I wanted to do things with friends and do things with and for myself. It was great.

I am about 6 weeks NC and today however, while I don't feel the weight of depression, I feel unbelievably angry. I was feeling all peaceful or indifferent and now I want him to die. NOt really, well kind of -- I just keep remembering things and getting angrier and angrier. the sight of things in the house that remind me of home make me infuriate me and I want to throw all of his shit out the window. I feel like I was in this phase already and don't want a set back or relapse. is this normal?

Oct 12 - 9AM
Deidre40
Deidre40's picture

Anger is a very big part of

Anger is a very big part of this whole healing process. Stick through it. It gets better. I no longer feel angry with him or myself for allowing it. The latter was the bigger part for me, anger-wise. I now see that how I was raised led me to accepting abusive behaviors, and in learning that, I could heal. I now feel indifference. I also don't hate the guy anymore; it's more a feeling of...did all that really happen? lol Keep at it!
Oct 11 - 10PM
Unfreakinreal
Unfreakinreal's picture

Oh...

If you don't need his things, get rid of that shit. That tshirt of his you still sleep in... Cut it up into tiny little pieces. Say adios. You may feel a little crazy during the extreme anger stage and that, my dear, is perfectly fine. :)
Oct 11 - 10PM
Unfreakinreal
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I am right there with

I am right there with you... I am insanely pissed off this week, and not at myself. All of those things he said, all the moments that he made out to be so significant. All of the shit I did for him to make his life a little easier while completely ignoring my own. I drove out to his house to drop off some Easter eggs while he was on shift so he would know someone was thinking of him. 2 days later he thanked me by dropping off my personal items from his bathroom in a plastic bag and told me he needed to cut all ties with me. 5 minutes later he said I was the best thing that ever happened to him and played the "I can't get enough of you" card. You are damn right I am pissed off. Fuck. This. Shit. I will take anger over crying in my car at lunch any day. I hear you honey, get it out. All the way out. Xoxo
Oct 11 - 2PM
Crazy Train
Crazy Train's picture

What you're feeling is

What you're feeling is normal. And I'm right there with you! I'm at 6 wks NC as well and I'm pissed at the crap he did to me. Let's be angry together!
Oct 11 - 11AM
Goldie
Goldie's picture

Yes, what the others said

This is a good thing. There is no depression with anger. Depression is the lack of anger and empowerment, so you are on your way, and making your way through the stages. This is a time of empowerment and the realization of WTF did I just do? What did I just come out of? WTF was I doing with this asswipe? Good stuff, don't worry, you won't stay in this stage for ever, one day you will wake up and feel peace again. Just go with it and journal, this is a great way to release anger as well as physical activity. God bless, Goldie
Oct 11 - 8AM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Welcome Back to life!!! You

Welcome Back to life!!! You go girl... Get it out!!! Hunter
Oct 11 - 6AM
Sparrow
Sparrow's picture

You are probably coming out

You are probably coming out of shock. Anger is a good thing. May not feel good, but it's an emotion that is very important to feel during your healing process. This too will pass. No worries. Stay strong!
Oct 11 - 2AM
aceonelady
aceonelady's picture

Well is normal for me....

Those last 4 days...I am feeling exactly the way you are...i was in a good place,but suddenly i woke up angry...and that's how i feel like being possessed...yesterday cried all day and stayed in bed,sleeping on and off...woke up terribly tired,and now just sad and started to come down...i think was necessary,maybe repressed feelings that just had to come out,plus the weather here just changed very sudden from sunny to dark and cloudy and very windy...and so did i...Hughs...

Aceonelady

Oct 12 - 2PM (Reply to #2)
emtg
emtg's picture

Thanks everyone!

I am happy to be angry with everyone and inspired by the encouragement and telling me it will pass. I still feel like smashing this computer into the wall but a little less crazy for feeling that way!