angela0714's story
angela0714's story
My second marriage was to a man who I knew deep down had an unusual way of viewing the world. He worshipped me when we were dating. Told me how smart I was (smarter than all his previous wives and girlfriends), how beautiful I was, and that he believed we were soul mates. He proposed marriage early on, but since I was only divorced for a year, I hesitated. However 3 years later we married. On my wedding night I realized the mistake I made. He treated me like a whore with no love or dignity. It was like I was now a possession to him. I bought our house and created a home. From the moment we got married he believed that since his son was only with us 1/2 the week and my kids were there all week. that he only needed to pay 1/5th of the mortgage. He insisted on paying ll the bills. He got irate when I purchased a new car w/out his name on the lien. His credit was horrible. He was $60,000 plus in debt.
My life revolved around him. We all walked on eggshells. If myself or my children would enter a room he would insist on being greeted immediately. He took credit for everything. You name it...he was the expert. Funny, he was the one with no money, no friends, little family ties, and no life except the friends he choose who held no jobs or families. He needed friends he felt superior to. My family hated him. eventually, he tried to eliminate all my friends or social ties. I am happy to say he wasn't succressful. He hated women. EspeciALLY STRONG WOMEN. My friends who had money, nice cars, success etc he found fault with. He actually would say when I may have been talking about my day. "Can we talk about me now.? Or he'd say I interrupted him and say, "Yes, but we're talking about me now."
He lost his job, due to trying to be a hero in aone of the largest school districts in the country. He caused an uproar in the school that they chose clever ways to eliminate him. He lost his career, even with having a year to look for another job with full pay. That's how bad they wanted him out. He claims a higher up (a woman) had the hots for him and that was her reason for trying to get him fired. Yes he was a good looking man. He never let you forget it. He insisted on telling me about past lovers. Even though I asked him numerous times to stop. It upset me. He criticized the college I went to. When I challenged him, he'd act like HE NEEDED TO EDUCATE ME AND SAVE ME FROM MY OWN STUPIDITY. If I sat in a restaurant, I had to sit with my back to the door, since to do otherwise was disrespecful to him. I couldn't watch shows with laugh tracks because he found them "insulting" and would fly into a rage.
He belittled, criticized and cut me down each and every day. Till finally I began to believe him. I went from a confident, accomplished, strong and beautiful woman to a shell of a person. Constantly doubting myself and my abilities. I am still recovering today. He left me 5 days after learning I was diagnosed with Lupus. This after my supporting him the last 16 months of hias unemployment. My house now faces foreclosure. I have lost everything. It's been 6 1/2 months since he left. I am still reeling and in need of therapy which I am now getting.
lAST CONTACT WAS 3 WEEKS AGO. To stop any potential contact, I realized I needed to block his e-mails and my cell phone. I am certain he hasn't tried to call. He feels no remorse and says I caused the breakup of our marriage. I never accepted it. He claims one thing he can't tolerate is an ANGRY WOMAN. My friends laugh when they hear it. He still harbors anger at his 87 year old mother in an asisted living home. I am his 3rd wife and I'm sure not the last. He is needy, controlling, manipulative and lacks empathy all together.
Before we got married he said I should be honored he "was putting all his eggs in my basket." Wow, how lucky I was. I realized now I never mattered. He wasn't capable of love. I was simply his source of supply for a total of 6 years. When I could no longer support him, was given this diagnosis and I had figured out the con-artist he was....he left. I pray every night to God, that I will eventually heal. If you are involved with someone you even slightly suspect meets any of the criteria for NPD, run for your life. Please!!! You have no idea how they can wear away your soul and leave you broken.
Thank you for listening.
Welcome angela0714
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welcome angela