And you know what else is cruel?

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#1 Apr 7 - 11AM
kizzy72
kizzy72's picture

And you know what else is cruel?

This is the part that hurts me the most. He knows I'm grieving the loss of my dad, so he says to me on the phone that my dad looks like a lion, and me being gullable, I ignored it, but then he went online and under four of my dad's pictures he put the words "a lion". By him doing this, allowed his friends on his list to see my fathers pictures and his comment.

I was so far gone, that I thought I would use what his said as an art project because I draw, but once I started to catch on to what he was doing, I deleted all of the comments.

Then during the second conversation I had with him, he asked me "did it bother you?", asking me about him making the lion comment.

Not only did he question why I felt I was still grieving the loss of him, but he was trying to teach me to forgive him and make it seem as though my relationship with my dad was as bad as his and that I had to learn to forgive him.

I told this man so much because he told me to get out a list of everything that everyone has done to hurt me, all the way back to my childhood. I revealed I had been molested, and then some.......

I feel so betrayed by this because i thought he was a God fearing man who was helping me get through a lot of hurt.

Apr 7 - 11PM
michele115 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Kizzy

This is terribly cruel and it is a betrayal. It is sadistic. I am sorry you went through this. Before I became aware of the fact that the man I was with was a narc...we did have problems we were trying to work out and I had finally broken down and shared some things with him explaining why I thought I had shut down. I didn't realize he was a big part of it, I was transferring some of my feelings because I couldn't see how HE was the one triggering all the memories! Well, in sharing SOME information, he said..."I want to understand all of you...I want to know your 'triggers' " and I had no idea about any of this narcissism stuff but something told me SHUT UP and I did. I am glad I did, this man was about to take over my brain!!! Let this be a lesson to you. Learn all about this disorder so you will be aware of the ques. It's a flag when they say things like that. I escaped by the skin of my teeth! Hugs!
Apr 7 - 5PM
Veronrose
Veronrose's picture

Yes Kizzy, that is just

Yes Kizzy, that is just CRUEL....no other word to describe it. And I too am very sorry for the loss of your dad. This reminded me of a comment mine made about my husband who had died a year before. My husband had a moustache. N saw pics of him and said, "Your husband was a very handsome man. Do you want me to grow a cookie duster?" I didn't know what a cookie duster was and when he told me I was like, what!?!? I hadn't thought about that one until just now, after reading your post. They are sick men. That's all there is to it. And not funny at all. xo
Apr 7 - 5PM (Reply to #8)
kizzy72
kizzy72's picture

are you serious!

That's terrible! And no it is not funny at all! They are seriously sick. I am amazed and how similar everyone's experiences are on here. :(
Apr 7 - 5PM (Reply to #9)
Veronrose
Veronrose's picture

I continue to be amazed at

I continue to be amazed at all the similar experiences. Honest to God, I could take a little bit from each person's story and it would come out to be my own.
Apr 7 - 3PM
Steph
Steph's picture

He asked if it "bothered

He asked if it "bothered you"???? This guy is sick. The fact that he would do that to you proves how sick and twisted he is. To take things that you shared privately with him, and use that to hurt you... PUBLICALLY is disgusting. I am so sorry that happened to you:(
Apr 7 - 4PM (Reply to #3)
kizzy72
kizzy72's picture

he didn't share

the private things i shared with him. He just made reference to my dad looking like a lion and then posting the words "a lion" on my facebook account under four of my dad's pictures. At first it didn't bother me but then I thought about it and it realized he was being mean.
Apr 7 - 4PM (Reply to #4)
Steph
Steph's picture

he may not have shared

he may not have shared "details"....but he did take advantage of your privacy, I think. I mean, posting those negative remarks under the pic....implies to others a sense of "evil". Again, sorry he did this to you.
Apr 7 - 4PM (Reply to #5)
kizzy72
kizzy72's picture

yes it was very .....

.....Evil of him to do. My dad had very strong features, so I guess to him he look like a lion, but my attitude was, why is it necessary to say that, then go on my page and post the comments for not only me to see but my grieving brother whom he was very much aware was on my page and grieving the loss of our dad as well? Some things you keep to yourself, but then to go on my account and post "a lion" "a lion" "a lion" "a lion" under my dad's pictures was cruel, especially knowing my dad hasn't even been deceased a year and he knew I am still grieving the loss. And the thing is, it did bother me, but I lied and said it didn't at first, but for him to ask me "did that bother you", after posting the comments shows he has a cruel streak.
Apr 7 - 4PM (Reply to #6)
Steph
Steph's picture

definately.It was

definately. It was insensitive and cruel. Everything a "Cluster F" ( as I like to call them, entails) If anyone had the right to post those comments, it would be YOU. No one else.
Apr 7 - 2PM
victimnomore
victimnomore's picture

Kizzy

This is how they operate. They get you to tell them everything about yourself so the can use it against you in the future. I also was tricked into telling my stbenh/p very intimate things about my life including sexual abuse by family members (men and women) and he turned right around and sexually abused me himself. He was very cruel. They are very calculating and will plan to hurt you from the first time they meet you. I understand how you feel. {{{HUGGS}}}

victimnomore