To all who come here...

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#1 Feb 4 - 8AM
spinning
spinning's picture

To all who come here...

I just want to say thank you to this community.

It is such a place of healing, inspiration, information, support, honesty, sharing, hope and most helpful truth.

I appreciate all of you who bravely share your honest thoughts and experiences. The help I have found here (even if some of it is brutally honest and not so warm and fuzzy!!) has been an amazing resource and healing. The levity that some inject (Ideal, SOI, Breis, etc.) into these horrible situations is also wonderful and inspirational:}

I just want to start this day by saying thank you and sending the good vibes to all for happiness and healing.

Sincerely (somewhat slower) spin cycle

Sending the good vibes for peace, healing and happiness

Feb 5 - 10AM
Fawn
Fawn's picture

Abandonment

It took losing both of my parents in the same year and then getting diagnosed with breast cancer for me to realize the true evil and total lack of compassion from the ex narc. He totally abandoned me during the most difficult and painful time of my life. We had been married for 13 years. Yes, I had clues before, but I ignored them and made excuses for him. He is just awful and isnt able to feel. Sad, isn't it? Now I understand how it feels when people care about me and help me when I have a problem. I was never Allowed to ask for help from someone who cared. He enjoyed my asking and his rejecting and abandonment. He enjoyed my pain and hurt. That is sick. The thing that you can take comfort in is that you are not alone. There are people who will love you and help you. You are just ask g the wrong person. Asking g for love and support from a narc is like going to the hardware store for bread.
Feb 4 - 1PM
sawthelight
sawthelight's picture

hey spinning

i haven't posted in a while, but i read EVERYDAY. i couldn't agree more about this site. it has been my savior. i love everyone here!!!

sawthelight

Feb 4 - 1PM (Reply to #8)
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Saw the light

Hi, Post we need you. :)
Feb 4 - 1PM (Reply to #9)
sawthelight
sawthelight's picture

i want to post more but its hard

i am married and my husband knows about the narc and hates him, and he also knows i go on this site and he is fine with that cause he knows it helps me. but i'm afraid i'll say something that would make my husband want to go down his house and kill him. he lives right down the street. help!!

sawthelight

Feb 4 - 2PM (Reply to #10)
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Get a Pit Bull and let him

Get a Pit Bull and let him loose one day! Make sure you point him in the right direction! Good Luck Idealk
Feb 4 - 12PM
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

Awww Shucks:)))) Ya know I

Awww Shucks:)))) Ya know I was just saying on another post some days I come here and when I talk about the narc it really is comical and I see what a complete retard he is and I find it terribly amusing.. other days I think about what a complete retard he is and its really very sad.. other days I think about what a complete retard he is and I could sob for days with deep deep pain... other days I think about what a retard I have become and laugh and I cry with equal amounts of intensity thats when you know you have been Narcd! but when Im just me not Narcd me Im usually jokster who is a little vain but can see the humor in myself. Im hoping Ill get back to her sooner or later. These cold gray days dont help but Spring will bring a about a rebirth and the color will return and I hope it will for me too! Glad you are doing so much better!
Feb 4 - 1PM (Reply to #3)
spinning
spinning's picture

SOI, I'm not doing all that hot...

but I'm really trying to SHIFT the focus. Past couple of days have been tough. Sunday will be three months NC. My dad is in his last weeks (maybe days)...I am flooded with emotion, the most predominant of which (especially this isolating blizzard situation) is abandonment...which is what the disordered one WANTED. It is what he DID in the midst of this huge life-changing family event. What a prince, eh? I've read and read, done exercises (mental and physical) and am truly trying to 'fake it til I make it.' This board helps A LOT. Love you guys, Sincerely (slowing down but burning) spin cycle (spinning):}

spinning

Feb 5 - 11AM (Reply to #6)
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

and put your pic up on the

and put your pic up on the new site so I can see you!
Feb 4 - 2PM (Reply to #5)
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

I lost my Dad 2 years post

I lost my Dad 2 years post narc round one. I will tell you this it is alot of loss to process but I got thru it you will too. I will get thru this I have just resigned myself to that fact that its just taking me longer. It will take as long as it takes and thats just that. I dont think you ever truly get them out of your head 100% I didnt after round one and over the last 15 years I did think of him from time to time the difference is that it didnt impair my life right now it impairs my quality of life and that is a problem so I just need to get to a place where it doesnt impair my other relationships or my quality of life.
Feb 4 - 1PM (Reply to #4)
Hunter
Hunter's picture

My prayers go out to you &

My prayers go out to you & your family. You are a tough little cookie. It will get better. Hang in. Oxox Ideal
Feb 4 - 9AM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Spinning

Aww!! You are way to sweet to have been Narced. I agree this site is an amazing resource. You deserve better and will get what you deserve. I see the Butterfly breaking free. All things happen for a reason. As they say ...what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Oxox Idealk