I feel so stupid....

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#1 November 16, 2017 - 9:29am

I feel so stupid....

I had an affair with my ex boss when we used to work together. Then after my ex husband made me tell the wife, my ex boss/lover stopped talking to me. I feel so stupid bc after 13 years of thinking EVERYTHING was my fault, I now realize he’s your typical narcissist. I just feel so stupid. For years I thought I was crazy and delusional and none of it was true. After a brief run in with him when they came and vacationed in Myrtle Beach where I live, he’s up to his old ways. This time I’ve gotten smarter bc I have a sister whose a narc and I know how to deal with her so I recognized his patterns. Now he’s trying to say that I sent stuff to his mom and that’s why he can’t forgive me. I know for a fact I never sent a damn thing to his mommy or anyone else. I had to get therapy bc I wasn’t sure if I was sane or not! I too have a mental illness of borderline personally disorder but that doesn’t make me crazy. Why do they always come back?

November 28, 2017 - 1:50pm

MamaCramer...

I think we all feel a "little stupid" when we finalize realize what we've been dealing with. We aren't stupid though, just "duped" by a person who has a personality disorder. We simply trusted... and trusting others is a good quality. I'm sorry about your experience with the narcissist but so happy you are brave enough to seek therapy. Working on our own health is very courageous and the benefits are rewarding. As for why the narcissist comes back, he's seeking supply, just as a vampire seeks another bite. Stay strong, go completely no contact with them if possible, and read, read, read.... there is an invaluable vault of archived topics within this forum. You can find answers to ANY question you may have. XOXO

FeFe

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