3+yrs later... another Hoover

7 posts / 0 new
Last post
#1 Feb 28 - 4PM
really
really's picture

3+yrs later... another Hoover

I haven’t been on this site in almost two years. I thought I was done with this. I had a 7yr history with the N. He D&Ded me for the last time in Oct 2009. I had no idea what I had been dealing with until I found Lisa’s book then. I read and listened to everything I could get my hands on, bawled like I had never bawled before, avoided contact, stayed away, and focused on trying to recover. The experience left me forever changed, but I have adjusted and accepted that and am good.

The last time I posted here was in Nov 2011 when N called me to tell me his dog was sick – 2 years after I had any contact with him! I had him blocked, but guess he could still leave a VM and I listened because I didn’t know it was him. I deleted, ignored, felt horrible, and posted about it here. I got great support, stayed NC, and user ‘Done sourcing’ told me to print the thread out and file it away for when it happens again or I have doubts. I did.

About two weeks ago, I was cleaning out my files and found a folder labeled “The End”. In it was the printout of the thread. I looked at it and was going to toss it, thinking I’d never need it again. I didn’t need reminders of him, didn’t want reminders of him. But I kept it, just in case.

Yesterday, more than 3 years after that phone call, more than 5 years after the D&D, he called. I forgot to block him when I got my new phone and switched carriers at the end of the year. His VM is still sitting there. I haven’t quite decided I am up to deleting it yet. I have no desire to see him or deal with him ever again. I’m done mourning the person he could be or I thought he was or wanted him to be. Of course, I am a little curious as to why he called, but it doesn't even matter. I’m kicking myself for not thinking to block him, but that's how much I don't think of him. I thought my ignoring him the last time, over the illness and death of his dog, made him mad enough at me to leave me alone. Nope.

I’m posting now, not because I need the support to NC, but to show others that they never, ever, ever, ever really go away. Never. Just never.

Mar 4 - 2PM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Why did he call?? He's

Mar 1 - 10AM
janice m m
janice m m's picture

Look back

Mar 1 - 10AM (Reply to #5)
janice m m
janice m m's picture

Sorry

Mar 1 - 7AM
Janie53
Janie53's picture

Really

Mar 1 - 6AM
Used
Used's picture

Realy

Mar 1 - 7AM (Reply to #2)
Janie53
Janie53's picture

Used