Long Overdue But Goodbye
Long Overdue But Goodbye
It's taken me 10 months to finally realize what I was dealing with for the last five years. I'm finally able to put a label on the monster that you are. I finally get it now... Now I know it wasn't me. There's nothing wrong with me. For that knowledge alone, I am actually happy again.
You knew what you were doing all along. Stringing me along, feeding me crumbs. You are a master manipulator, a user and so terribly dangerous to women. I trusted you. I fell so in love with you but now I know the truth. It was just an illusion. You were just an illusion. Pretending to be who you thought I wanted you to be. Five years of lies...
I should have never spoken to you again after the first red flags I saw, but your phony begging, knowing exactly the right words to say to lure me back in. You were an expert at it. You loved how much I gave you, how I took care of you. You knew what a good thing you had with me. No wonder you never let me go. Too bad it was all a show. Just so you always had someone to stroke your ego for you, your huge ego.
What I can never understand though is the final months of our relationship. You acted so in love with me one year ago. I was the center of your life. I went away for two weeks on vacation with my mom (you wouldn't take me anywhere) and the minute I stepped off the plane, everything was different. For the next two months you went from not being able to get enough of me to treating me like something stuck to the bottom of your shoe. When I asked you if you were seeing the ex gf you swore you hated, you looked me in the eye and said, "you know I don't speak to that bitch".
I treated you so much better than anyone you've ever known. You became my life. I didn't deserve to be cast aside like that. Why couldn't you have been honest? Why couldn't you have ended our relationship in an honorable way? That is what destroyed me more than anything. I got no explanation. No uncomfortable breakup conversation. No closure whatsoever.
I knew you went back to her and for months you would still try to get back with me, swearing you weren't with her. But it was all lies. Now you still make sure you show up in my life at least once a month. For what? So I won't forget about you? Just to fuck with my mind? I know your pathetic mind thinks I'm sitting around waiting for you. You don't get it, do you?
You are a despicable excuse for a man. What you did to me was beyond disgraceful.
What you did to your mother and continue to do to your mother makes you a monster. You are a miserable human being. The most unhappy man I've ever known. Now I know why. There is no hope for you. You will grow old alone and miserable. I think I've always known that on some level.
I don't want to say, good luck, wish you well, because quite frankly I don't wish anything for you. The only thing I wish is that I never knew you. Stay out of my life, don't orchestrate any more chance meetings. I NEVER want to see you again.
Its kind of sad, you walk around like you're this amazing guy and you think you're all that. Now I really do see you for who you really are, a shallow, superficial scared little boy. I know the truth about you and now I know that you will always be the frightened, miserable person you are now. I know that you have never and will never have a healthy relationship in your entire life. But I will go on to find true happiness with a real man and I will never have to think about you ever again!