my story

Tired of going back's Story

I met you years ago and we instantly had an attraction to one another. We remanied friends for awhile and finally decided to become more. ( I now realize I was probably the other woman at that time)

This first year we were together I was in love. You were funny and caring, and protective. I thought this is the love of my life and I am never going to be with another man.

About a year into our relationship I noticed the verbal abuse.... You wiyld belittle me, have mood swings and I would react with crying and begging. You also began using me for mnoney and I was the one who paid for all eveything, including al expenses for our children.

During my third pregnancy you cheated and left me for another woman.
I remanined faithful, and for months was sent into a dark depression, all the while taking care of three children alone. Suddnely you returned and just like that wanted me back ( I know realize it was because your old supply did not work out) But at the time I thought it was because you really did love me and had now seen the error of your ways. A month after taking you back the physical abuse began. One night you were very drunk and you accused me of cheating. You then strangled me, threw me down ripping clothing off me and my new bracelett.

You also ripped off doors that night and made several holes in the wall. I was so scared and sad. I thought it was my fault so I took you back. It was about a month later I found out about narcissists. I treid to leave you then only to get sucked back in over and over.

For months I began to have severe mood changes. I would cry, and think about suicide. I felt that I was never good enough for you, that our children were not good enough for you either.

I was constantly walking on eggshells never knowing what kind of reaction you would have to something... Resentment started to build and I began hating you. You were so selfish, critical, and you lied to every one. You borrowed money and never paid it back, and stole money from me constantly.

I remember you buying me nice things and then later blaming me when you had no money. Every month you would buy yourself gifts, and food... all the while I used every dime I had for our children.

You are abusive, selfish, cruel, passsive aggressive, a liar... But you always said I was this way. The sad part is that when it came to you I was this way in the end. I became you. I started going to therapy and joined this group. I am ready to move on with my life.

At this point you have really had nothing to do with the kids. I have broken nocontact yesterday and texted you and called you, telling you off. Of course you ignored me, and I receieved no validation.

I do not think you should see your children period. You do not help with any thing, and you live a single mans life while I do all the hard work.
I think you want it that way so that I have no life.

I am here to tell you I am done with you! You are a BPD, NPD. You are repulsive and evil to me. It took me a long time to get to this pint and I am not going to turn back now.

I know you will continue to try and play your ugly games, and gain supply, but I made the choice when I woke up today to block you from any avenue, including e-mail. I informed you that if you come to my home I will call the police. You are not a father in my eyes and certainly not a man. Goodbye and thank God. TOGB.