Gracie_82's Story

Is my ex a narcissist?

From reading a good deal of posts on here I'm not sure if the guy I recently got rid of is actually a narcissist...
I have posted some of my story on the Narc @ Work forum because, unfortunately I work in the same office as him.

I got involved with him about 7 months ago, was warned that he'd had a 2 year affair with a married co-worker (while he was with his long-term gf), questioned him about it, tried to give him the chance he was asking for, but his actions indicated things with his co-worker weren't quite over. There were other things as well that bothered me, like checking his phone lots when we were out together, saying that he wanted to spend the day with me (after a night together) but then promptly telling me about the plans he had with his friends. So after about a month I called an end to it.

He didn't accept this however, and spent the next 2 months trying to "win" me back. He was always the one to get in contact with me but I gave in until I'd had enough at the end of Jan this year. He got no supply from me and contact stopped.

Two weeks after NC commenced, he arrived at work in the morning with the co-worker he'd had the affair with and after that there were a few shows of affection in right in front of me in the office. This profoundly affected me because he had told me it was over with her and that he wasn't the same person he was when they had had the affair. It was obviuously all lies.

No I have found out that a girl from another office (same company) likes him and there are signs that they have started something. She is a GREAT catch too - much better than me - prettier, younger, etc.

This girl is lusted after by practically every guy I know in the office so he's really hit the jackpot. I believe he's even screwed one of his best mate's over for this girl as it was common knowledge that his friend really liked her but now my ex-narc has her (or at least she's professed to liking him).

But does this make him a narcissist or could he actually do right by this girl and treat her right? I can't bear to see this played out before if it's true.

His ex never found out about the affair he'd had with his co-worker and he ended their relationship so he never had to deal with the consequences of conducting it...

Please let me know your thoughts as I am struggling to know if this guy is a narc and therefore if he is likely to continue his usual pattern or if he will actually be a decent boyfriend to this girl....