Annabelle's Story

I will try to summarize my 2 years relationship. I would like to know if I was really dating a narcissist, because right now even if all my heart denies it, i think I am one. I guess it's just the old pattern telling me to take the blame....
We met 2 years ago at a party in September. I was all smile and fun in the middle of a conversation with a few people, when he appeared. We started to talk and meet and I liked him, but wasn't so much hooked on him. I just wanted to have some fun. We started to date, he was taking me out to nice restaurants and giving me some gifts to impress me. Shortly We-I fell in love with him. He was taking me around like a golden sword, being extremely proud of me. I really enjoyed all the attention, so I thought I have found the love of my life.Until he cheated on me out of the blue in March, when he lost his job (he always thought it was the biggest mistake of this company and how great he is, just someone amazingly talented and successful) in March and he wanted to move to an other city. He gave me a key to the apartment and the next day he invited over a girl for dinner and slept together... I found this out because he left his phone and she called him 3 am....so i asked what is going on...he was telling me all bullshits, and back then my mind was still at its right place, so soon I have figured he was cheating so I dumped him. He was begging and all this craziness, and I took him back. He wanted me to move in right after this mess came out. He told everybody that I am control freak, because I have checked hid phone - but never mentioned anything about that girl to anybody. Friends started to question my mental state...and with time they really hated me... I didn't move with him,but i took him back. He started a company based on a friends idea. I still don't know if it's really also his company or not.... He was always so amazed by himself and his achiveness that sometimes he shead tears when he was talking about himself. But when I needed emotional support he went numb/ignorant- i am sorry for you- or just left the room. He never screamed at me, but he was saying things: you should grab yourself together, you should have some more self confidence, etc... but he critisized me all the time, saying I would like to improve your skills... and get you to better results in your life (before i met him, I was a manager with great projects/just about to start my new career... I went for 2 years struggling, because he made me move back to my previous profession, I didn't like... "helping me" to build my business - since he left, I am back on track) When we had sex he calles his penis Sir X and he always told me "you are mine".... In december he met someone he wanted to break up. But he told me he wants to break up, because i became clingy and needy.... I was shocked. Soon after I didn't dare to do anything becasue I never knew when was I doing something wrong. So I went passive, while deep inside I KNEW something wasn't ok... yet he blamed me, that I can't trust and told me he is going to HAVE TO leave me if I stop questioning him... It was again out of the blue for me, yet he was claiming we had issues.... I was confused... he decided to stay with me... but I had no idea about the other woman back then. After that it really went crazy... He started to make his move to this girl he left at the end with, he went to a ball with his bets friend (girl) without telling me a word about it, I figured it later. They went to his parents house!!! And his parents knew me, and they were ok with it. He was talking with his mom every day 4-9 times. She was his best friend, his trusted everything. On the weekend of the ball he hardly talked to me on the phone, telling me, that I need to do my process, because I am posessive, I am questioning the relationship, i don't trust him... I figured this girl The first time he called her from the room where I was in, telling me it's a work related call, but I could tell it wasnt so I kept asking. He destroyed me. Soon I went to carzy mood, screaming shouting, while he remained cool, just to make me we even more crazy. He was laughing inside now I can see it... He was perfect, hardly out of his logical and perfect life always controlled mood...He was parting all the time, claiming that he loves me. he never had money with me, but he was always parting... In April I figured the ball. I ended up as a person, who doesn't know how to behave and someone who is crazy - We had a fight and I hit him once- and he will leave me if I dont change.... all his friends hated me by this time. All of them new what was he doing behind my back. In the maintime he wanted me to move to his city, so I did. i took his sister's place- I never liked it, because "that's the only place" I could get... i ended up in a horrible financial situation and an apartment when there were lots of technical issues and a legal debate... now his family called me un-greatful as well. I was crying my heart out, but there was no support... 2 weeks later, he left me for the girl in december. It was so hard... Friday he told me he loves me after a horrible fight, when I wanted to break up after he made apologize to that girlfriend whom he went to the ball for my behavior. After that he looked at me and he said: you look so empty... I told him literally, that my heart is empty, I have nothing more to give, I gave you everything. I gave back the key and wanted to break up. He was begging not to..... Saturday he went off with this girl after taking me to the train station, giving an extra kiss coming INTO the train... sunday morning at 4 am, because I couldn't reach him the whole night and I was awake, he broke up with me NAKED on skype. The next day I went to see him, beause I didnt understand anything. He needed time and so it took me an other 3 days to torture me (lunch every day, romantic dinner, weekend plans, telling me I love you a night before) before telling me that it's over, and he is relieved that it's over and the times with me were horrible for him and he is attracted to this woman and I should go. He never called again. But stalked me AND his friends my google plus site as followers...now people and his entire family blocked me on facebook after I removed them... I think he is even badmouthing me.... I cut all the contacts so I assume it from some friends reactions they know him... since that was the only platform he could still check on me. I went to psychotherapy because I was suicidal tendencies for a week...I really think he had a master plan to destroy me and he was working to getting that girl (and others they texted him on saturday mornings....while we were in friends, you know "old friends") and he only stayed with me until he got her. I am happy he is gone... but I am so sad because I miss the person I believed he was... That's the stroy. It's 2 months now. I am alive. Because I have friends .... I though I don't have anymore. It turned out that everyone hated him, because he was arrogant and always right. This is how he threated people they were not so "cool" or worth for his attention. All his rich friends, good connections, he was obsessed with love him, because he is a super nice guy, who always help.... I lost my essence, I lost my radiance, the faith in myself and he thought also in life.... He made me look for others as a loser a pitiful individual.....So please tell me... If he made me scream and go crazy... is he still one of them? thank you. god bless you all...