Weird things your narc did....Chime in!

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July 5, 2011 - 11:58am
TraumaMamma
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Fox News obsession

Had to watch it constantly. Bill O'reilly. I hate the media. I swim it it at work. I need quiet after my day. He would engage me constantly on issues, GOP candidates etc. I asked my friend what the "anti-matter" to fox was and he said MSNBC and I suggested it once to N to see the other side for a "balanced view" and he threw the biggest temper tantrum ever. Wah wah wah...I won't watch anything at all here. I don't want to watch TV at all anymore...Forget it. He said he had to watch Fox every am in case a "Meteor was hurtling towards the earth." Are you fucking kidding me??? My friend says the only things Fox is gonna say about that meteor is that the Meteor is late on its taxes! Ironically, a meteor did have a close call a week after he said that, which further pissed me off.

Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow.' --Mary Anne Radmache

July 5, 2011 - 12:54pm (Reply to #67)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Another FOX fan

The ex-Psych prof was a BIG fan of FOX... he was proud that he was NOT a "Massachusetts liberal." This was before Sean Hannity, Bill O'Reilly and Glenn Beck, in the mid-90s. FOX was a conservative station looong before Keith Olbermann&Rachel Maddow were at MSNBC. The ex-P's father liked mocking Berkeley liberals;so did the ex-P. The ex-P was *ECSTATIC* when Clinton signed DOMA, banning gay marriage. I can only wonder how he reacted when Massachusetts legalized gay marriage ;) The ex-P watched FOX religiously, as well as "The Simpsons." He liked spending class time discussing the latest "Simpsons" episode.
July 4, 2011 - 6:45am
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture

My exnarc

was coming to visit me at my house, meanwhile I had a neighbor and his little 6 year old daughter over to my place, the neighbor was changing the toilet seat out for me upstairs in the bathroom, near the bedroom, as the old toilet seat broke. Anyway the man and his daughter start coming down the stairs, while I am opening the garage door for the Narc, the narc comes in, takes one look at the man, gets in his car and takes off, while I and the other man are in total disbelief, he must have thought I was upstairs screwing the man, with his daughter there, RIGHT.. what an sick idiot!!!!
July 5, 2011 - 11:54am (Reply to #65)
ShaynasMommy
ShaynasMommy's picture

Oh wow

what a coward! He didn't even want to take the time to see what the true situation was! He thought that was the competition! hilarious
July 4, 2011 - 3:09am
SoOverItNext
SoOverItNext's picture

Weird things

my Narc did the strangest things. It's so refreshing (in a way) to read some of your posts because I really thought that NO ONE else could possibly know what this craziness is like. My Narc would get jealous of my 4 year old son when I would read him a bedtime story, he would burst in the room and say "Come On, what's taking you so long?" I'm like "I'm reading my son a book!". He would become angry and not talk the rest of the night and claim that I always ignore him. One day, he followed me to work and sat on my car ALL day long. 9am -5pm in order for me not to break up with him. Earlier that morning, I told him that I needed to talk to him....(forgot what it was about but I wasn't getting ready to break up) and he went the distance to not be dumped. He constantly tells me that I am not as good as other woman and that she is SO great. But when we are on better terms, he says that she is the worst person in the world. I really don't know if she's the GREAT person or the AWFUL person. Total waste of time.
July 3, 2011 - 12:22pm
deecbee
deecbee's picture

Ok, now I need to write in

Ok, now I need to write in here because I'm fighting the urge to contact him to continue an argument we had last night and I need to maintain NC. - We were out to dinner once and I got up to use the restroom. I came back to find my purse missing. I started panicking and he claimed to not have a clue how it went missing right before his eyes. I spent the next 20 minutes causing a stir in the restaurant, asking people around me, speaking to the bartender about it, running around the room, outside looking for something- anything that would tip me off. It wasn't until I called the police to file a report that he pulled the purse out- he HID it to "teach me a lesson" about leaving my purse unattended. But it wasn't unattended, it was with him! The whole thing was so creepy and bizarre, I should've known right then and there this guy was a special kind of sicko. - He doesn't refer to his girlfriends by their name while he's actually in a relationship with them. He calls them "that girl", or "the one I'm hanging out with" or "my latest one". After they've broken up and it's in the distant past, he refers to them by their first names. Pretty peculiar. - He has no problem ignoring me- my emails, my texts, my calls, etc for weeks on end... but the minute I delete him from Facebook (it has happened many times lol), that's when he starts responding and being attentive. For some reason, that's the only way he'll pay any sort of attention and the only thing that gets him out of the silent treatment. - He takes my words and phrases and uses them as his own. Not like I can "own" a word, but if I use a word phrase out of the ordinary, within hours he'll be using that same word or phrase in his own sentences. I know some mirroring is normal and healthy between people, but this was so sudden and obvious that it struck me as odd.
July 5, 2011 - 9:03am (Reply to #61)
IncognitoBurrito
IncognitoBurrito's picture

Deecbee

You said... - "He has no problem ignoring me- my emails, my texts, my calls, etc for weeks on end... but the minute I delete him from Facebook (it has happened many times lol), that's when he starts responding and being attentive. For some reason, that's the only way he'll pay any sort of attention and the only thing that gets him out of the silent treatment." - "He takes my words and phrases and uses them as his own. Not like I can "own" a word, but if I use a word phrase out of the ordinary, within hours he'll be using that same word or phrase in his own sentences. I know some mirroring is normal and healthy between people, but this was so sudden and obvious that it struck me as odd." ~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ BOTH of these statements hit me in the gut! The N in my life, went from corresponding, in one way or another, many times every single day, to being unresponsive for a month at a time! This, he blamed on having no concept of time! What BS! Life is too short to wait that long, for word from another party! He would also use my own, unique, vocabulary as his own. No one else has ever done that, to the extent that he did. Both of these things in your Narc, were dead on, similar to mine! Spooky!
July 5, 2011 - 11:48am (Reply to #62)
TraumaMamma
TraumaMamma's picture

Hmmm

Mine too. Couldn't reply to emails, texts or phone calls. Had two phones. Owned his own business. Was EXTREMELY hard to get a hold of. I was known as "sweet girl" Not Donna.

Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow.' --Mary Anne Radmache

July 2, 2011 - 11:12pm
deecbee
deecbee's picture

Gosh, this thread is

Gosh, this thread is strangely comforting! He's done all of this and more. I think my main issue with the narc was his weird, cryptic messages. I guess on here it would be called "narc speak". Just random phrases that sound good in a way... yet terrible... and yet I have NO clue what he means and not sure he does either. It's all just jibberish. And then I spend hours on end trying to figure out what he just said.
July 3, 2011 - 2:56pm (Reply to #59)
Erali
Erali's picture

Yeah, my XNP would say things

Yeah, my XNP would say things that could be interpreted in a million different ways and it was never clear which was intended. It turns out the intention was simply to confuse me.
July 2, 2011 - 12:50pm
fooled no longer
fooled no longer's picture

never again 115

"A mother will take any abuse in order to allow her child a normal existence!" your words explain exactly why he got you into this mess. they are the answer to my mess too. Women who can truly walk away and not have to consider anyone but themselves, are the lucky ones.
July 1, 2011 - 11:15pm
NeverAgain115
NeverAgain115's picture

STRANGE things....

There are hundreds, but here is one that stands out in my mind! At his condo waiting for other people to join us - I find out that they have cancelled and tell him. I notice he tests how his breath smells on his hand when he thinks I'm not looking - two seconds later, he grabs me around the waist and says "do you still want me?" - we had not ever had sex, but had done the heavy makeout, etc. (He claimed after the heavy makeouts that since I was serving as his publicist, he was no good at relationships, and if we were to become involved romantically - he would mess it up in about 6 months time and I would hate him - therefore removing all of the pr opportunities I had secured for him to tout his new "medical model".) Narc, narc, narc bark!!!! So he is grabbing me, and I admit, I wanted to see how far he would go - unfortunately, I had been in a sexless marriage for over five years - and at the time, did not realize he was NPD - he then proceeds to rip my jeans off in lightening time, throw me over the bed, pick me back up and awkwardly carry me to the other side of the bed (?), threw me back on the bed and ripped my panties off (no interest in the shirt, undoing the bra - and goodness, I wondered why as I am a 36DD - and just thought at least he would want to look....NOPE!!! He then proceeds to strip his jeans off and decides to "tease" with his member - during this - I noticed (oddly) that he was looking straight ahead and seemed to be emotionally dis-attached from the whole thing - he continued for a couple more minutes (I was thinking things would be different when we really got into it) - but then, much to my disbelief, he pulls back, zippers his penis back into his pants and smiles and loves my expressions of frustration!!! He then told me that when he has sex, he hears a song in his head, and when the song is over....THAT'S IT! ALL DONE! Exactly like a toddler done with a toy! I picked myself up, dressed and stormed out of the condo with him chasing me telling me that I would always get and deserved the biggest hug from him. I was so physically disgusted, that once I drove away, I had to pull over on the side of the road and throw up! He is severe and a freak of the highest order! Thank you all - I knew I could only tell you all this!
July 2, 2011 - 6:18pm (Reply to #56)
sunny 523
sunny 523's picture

Ewwww!! How gross....I would

Ewwww!! How gross....I would have been sick, too. Yuck!
July 2, 2011 - 2:13pm (Reply to #55)
Erali
Erali's picture

Holy shit! What a tool!

Holy shit! What a tool!
July 5, 2011 - 11:53am (Reply to #54)
Used
Used's picture

NEVER AGAIN115

GOD ALMIGHTY...IF I HAD HEARD THIS BEFORE I EVER KNEW ABOUT THIS FORUM...I WOULDNT HAVE BELIEVED IT....SINCE THIS FORUM I BELIEVE IT ALL, AND THEN SOME...OH THIS IS SO FRIGGEN SICK..SICK ...SICK..XX
June 30, 2011 - 9:10pm
Tinker
Tinker's picture

great topic! my N told me

great topic! my N told me when we first started dating and i wanted to spend more time together, to date other men. he said he was looking for a woman with a life! later on, he threw it in my face that i dated, but i have emails where he admits he told me to. when i got engaged a year later to someone else, he told me that he had 3 kinds of stage 3 cancer and didn't want me to see him sick which is why he told me to date! it's 2 years later and he's still 30 lbs overweight and no sign of cancer. one time something happened with my daughter and i sat in front of him and was crying. he just sat there. i probably cried 2 or 3 times in 3 years and he said he was tired of my crying and whining! we even talked about his being devoid of empathy. i told him he'd better fake that better in the future with other women:) i'm sure we could all go on and on...
July 5, 2011 - 11:52am (Reply to #52)
TraumaMamma
TraumaMamma's picture

OMFG!!!

My guy said he "survived" melanoma. Without any treatment. Chemo, radation, etc. Never even had a follow up. He is deathly afraid of the sun and watches his diet so as "not to feed the cancer" But melanoma is deadly... One would think after surviving such an event one would follow up and get rechecked. But no...he continued to be preachy about my TANNING. And I go to a dermatologist EVERY year for a total body scan. And have had moles removed that were large or bothersome. What the heck!!?!? I think he was full of shit.

Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow.' --Mary Anne Radmache

July 3, 2011 - 12:04am (Reply to #51)
rosedewittbukater
rosedewittbukater's picture

OMG me too

"I want you to date other people" Yeah I got this too even after almost 2 years of being together. N "felt too much pressure". I asked "you really want someone else touching me?" to which N replied "that's not the point...yaddah yaddah yaddah narc speak, narc speak" You get the idea. Mine hardly ever seemed interested in my top half either. Most of the time he wouldn't even bother taking off my shirt and when I tried to take it off he would get impatient and actually stop me from removing it. Sick MF-ers
July 1, 2011 - 7:36pm (Reply to #50)
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture

marissa

Mine, when i went to stay with him after i sold my place, and was not sure where to move to, he never offered for us to live together in a committed relationship, I was crying in the bedroom, so unsure of my future, and he comes in and says 'stop your crying be happy you have a roof over your head and food on the table'and his son and wife were coming over so cheer up, never did he put his arms around me or comfort me in any way, the man is inhuman and made of stone...
June 30, 2011 - 3:55pm
ValiditySeeker
ValiditySeeker's picture

We

Walked down a sidewalk to a movie theatre and when I paused at a door to a bar to see if I knew the band that was playing, he got a weird look on his face and completely ran the other direction. Still to this day don't know what that was about. He got a room alone in college after having a roommate for a semester. He said that he simply couldn't live with another human being. That should have been a redflag. He was paranoid about germs but refused to wear a condom during sex. There are other things but for the most part, he left me scratching my head a lot.
June 30, 2011 - 8:19am
TNR1
TNR1's picture

After the Arnold scandal

After the Arnold scandal broke, Mr. N sent me a text message that he in essense wanted to have a child with me so that we could continue to have sex and he could take zero responsibility.
July 27, 2011 - 4:53am (Reply to #47)
Survivor101
Survivor101's picture

Sounds familiar

Mine sent me a text saying that "I will have you above or underneath me again one day and that's a promise" narc speak it could mean anything especially to him! Sick freaks! I wish mt body didn't respond to him the way it does though, urgh so frustrating maybe it's coz he didn't touch me in over 6 years and when he did nothing much happened that and he slept on the couch since after my daughter was born. So many things I still scratch my head about.
June 29, 2011 - 6:50pm
ruby01 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

We were at a BBQ

and I wanted to go get cigs so we got in his car and he immediately said, "Those people are all a--holes!" I said, "They've all been really nice to me." He started yelling, "If your going to have an attitude with me then get the F--K out of my car now! GET OUT!!" I got in my car and left and he went back and hung out with all the people he just called a--holes!
July 2, 2011 - 11:06pm (Reply to #45)
deecbee
deecbee's picture

LOL, yep! This has happened a

LOL, yep! This has happened a few times with me!
July 2, 2011 - 12:41pm (Reply to #44)
fooled no longer
fooled no longer's picture

Perfect!

Perfect!
June 29, 2011 - 4:39pm
Susan32
Susan32's picture

Gary Johnson

He's the first registered GOP candidate for the presidential race next year. He's also the former governor of New Mexico. Back in the day, when Gary was governor of New Mexico, he was into being an Iron Man triathlete. The ex-Psych prof idolized Gary... had a total man-crush... and he'd also constantly insult Gary Johnson's wife (who passed away recently from cancer, not long after she&Gary divorced) My classmates&I were quite ready to have a "love offering" to set him up on a date with Gary. He was intensely jealous of Gary Johnson's wife. Now that Gary is single again...
June 29, 2011 - 7:18am
Smitten Kitten (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Disappearing in the store

One time we stopped by a giant Target just so I could use the ladies room. When I went in, he was waiting right outside the bathrooms. When I came out, he was nowhere to be seen, so I assumed he decided to use the men's room. So I waited, and waited, and waited, and waited. He just happened to leave his cell phone in the car on this occasion, so I couldn't call him from mine to find out where he was. So I went out to the car to see if he was there. Nope. Went back in the store and continued waiting around the bathroom area, although I started walking around looking in that general vicinity. I actually started to get worried and asked a store employee to check the men's bathroom in case something happened to him in there. No, he wasn't in there. Finally, he came meandering back towards the front of the store telling me he'd gone to the electronics section, saying that's what men do when they're in a store. Really? In my experience, they wait for you by the place they left you or TELL you first where they will be so you can find them. They don't just wander off for 20-30 minutes like a little kid, especially without their phone. At the time I thought, how dense and inconsiderate. Now I think he did it on purpose as part of his game-playing bullshit. What an asshole.
June 29, 2011 - 7:40pm (Reply to #41)
Erali
Erali's picture

That was totally on purpose.

That was totally on purpose. I've been reading a lot of stories here about the disappearing act lately, and it looks pretty common. Which among these folks, means intentional. I got it all the time (including sneaking out of the back door of bars). It's actually kind of funny (in a ridciulous, "are you for real?" way) once you imagine the thought process (if they deserve that much credit) of coming up with a plan to annoy someone by doing something so socially inappropriate.
June 30, 2011 - 6:01am (Reply to #40)
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture

smitten kitten

nine did that a lot and here I was wandering all over the store looking for him, the best one for me was when years ago we went for a kike at a town in the mountains and we were walking along and came upon a very marshy area, real wet and muddy, I said to mhim,i do not want to ruin a good pair of shoes by going through all the muck, did you think he would say OK and we tun around and go back HAHAHA, what is the next joke, he keeps walking on without me to leave me in the woods by myself, a small petite woman and for me to walk the 3 miles back to civilization, if an ax murderer had walked by, I would be a goner, what an inconsiderate, self absorbed fool, cares for NO ONE but his stupid self!!I waited so long for him by the car that I finally gave up and went to talk to a guy who owned a cabin down from the forest and 2 hours later he shows up!!!Like no big deal, who cares about onwithmylife, FOOL
June 28, 2011 - 9:32pm
ifinallygotit
ifinallygotit's picture

he emailed me that he went on a job interview

while I was on vacation. But he had actually packed his car and moved across the country for a job that a friend gave him without telling me while I was out of town. He then called a few weeks later and said "I got the job but we are not breaking up, is your car ok?". As many of you know he just showed up 11 and a half months later acting like he was away on a two week business trip... He had zero insight into his behavior - it seems true what many say on here that Narcs have no sense of time... I still love him (but also fear the impact of his crazy behavior!).
June 28, 2011 - 8:23pm
reallyconfused
reallyconfused's picture

He got hit by a car on his

He got hit by a car on his bike. He called to tell me that and also that he wasn't going to be in touch for awhile. From what I could tell it wasn't anything serious; just a few bruises and a chipped tooth. I would text him to see how he was doing, but he was really unresponsive, very short answers like "i'm fine." It was almost as if he was embarrassed by what happened to him. All I wanted to do was show that I care and he shut me out telling me at one point he doesn't want to talk to anyone as if he was in a horrible accident instead of a minor one. I thought it weird..
June 28, 2011 - 2:32pm
prettypeeved
prettypeeved's picture

After having a shower he

After having a shower he would absolutely cover himself in moisturiser. It was like OCD or something.
June 28, 2011 - 6:34am
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Mine was going to come visit

Mine was going to come visit Chicago, but of course at the last minute he has no one to watch his DOG! The OW who was to watch Dog at the last minute couldn't because her dog was in heat and his dog couldn't be around her dog. He never bought a plane ticket in the first place, I had hotel and Dinner reservations made all over the city. He never showed, I went out with my Girlfriend instead, and he got pissed. WTF? Assclown, hahaha, he couldn't control Hunter. Looking back My Dog whisperer is textbook. "LOSER" Hunter
June 28, 2011 - 6:55am (Reply to #32)
janine
janine's picture

another one Narc couldn't control

Standing infront of two restaurants on our first holiday together I wasn't sure which one to go into. Narc of course never made any decisions! Reading the menu I turned around and found him gone. First I was puzzled, then annoyed, then I decided I'd have a good time without him. Went into the restaurant, enjoyed a great meal with much attention from the waiters, practised what bits of the language I'd picked up and was invited to a bar by some locals. Much more fun than I'd had with Narc before. After some drinks and flirting I went back to our hotel where sulking Narc was staring into his notebook, kissed him on the cheek and told him what a great evening he had missed out on. My first lesson in passive aggression, his first in who he was dealing with. Need I say he never tried this on again?
July 27, 2011 - 4:57am (Reply to #35)
Survivor101
Survivor101's picture

Hahahaha

Hahahaha brilliant!
June 28, 2011 - 2:28pm (Reply to #33)
Gerri
Gerri's picture

Disappearing Narcs

Hi Janine - My Narc used to do the disappearing act. Went out with a few mates and he claimed he couldn't find anyone - so went home. We were in a tiny bar! Also he was supposed ot meet me in a club - but claimed that he got mugged (twice) on his way there and had his phone taken! Yeah right - queue the a) Let's get the girlfriend worried because I don't turn up at the club. b) An excellent chance to throw his cheap phone away and get the girlfriend to by him a decent one on credit (coz the n can't get credit) It's mental when you think back and everything just clicks into place.
June 29, 2011 - 5:53am (Reply to #34)
janine
janine's picture

Hi Gerri

Yeah, it's mental. Let's get others worried.....probably works on those that haven't had the pleasure of dealing with the friggin' nutcases before. Or should I be saying with passive aggressive cowards? Hopefully you did not spend much on that phone for your Narc!
June 28, 2011 - 6:23am
Hunter
Hunter's picture

MER

Gosh the more you tell me about this guy, the more I see why you miss him, NOT! Hunter
June 27, 2011 - 5:09pm
dolphingirl
dolphingirl's picture

they are the weird thing

The ex-narc invited me to go out to dinner to meet some old friends of his from college who were in town. (btw\the only friends he had were friends from college- 30 years ago, he was fiercely devoted to them, and had no local friends) He emailed me about an hour before he was supposed to pick me up and told me that he had invited his ex-wife to go and that if I still wanted to go I could meet them at the resturant. So I emailed him back and told him to go and have fun because I was thinking of going out with an ex of mine he called right away and told me that the dinner was off and he was all depressed and wanted to take me out. these guys are pathetic
June 27, 2011 - 3:29pm
mystwoman
mystwoman's picture

Gee, there are so many

Gee, there are so many stories to tell. These guys are such weirdos. lol. I think one of the best ones of xnh had to do with him going on a job interview. Nothing in this world is ever good enough to suit him. This includes his job, his wife, his home, whatever. Therefore, after months of being a complete and utter pain in the butt to me about wanting to go work in another city, he finally managed to get an interview early one morning. I had pointedly told xnh that I was NOT changing jobs just because he wants to change his, AND that I was not selling my house or moving if he got a job 100 miles away from home either. He can take whatever job he wishes, but he'll be commuting to it every day without any involvement from me. Since xnh was just sure the world would explode if he didn't go somewhere else to work, he started job hunting without thinking about any of the impacts from doing this. On the morning of the interview, xnh slept through his alarm, and was running late (as usual - xnh is habitually late everywhere). In addition, xnh was always worried about his "image" and how he appears to others so he drove an overpriced Ford Mustang Cobra with custom paint and wheels. The whole nine yards worth. On this particular morning, xnh got into his fancy car (late) to drive 100 miles to this interview, and (of course) realized that he had absolutely no gas in the car for the trip. Apparently xnh blasted into the gas station in a huge flurry of drama, shoved the nozzle into the tank, filled his car, and then blasted out of the gas station equally fast (and with I'm sure as much drama and tire squealing as he could manage so that everyone would notice him). When he arrived at the interview (late), the guy that was interviewing him was standing at the door waiting. Xnh probably thought he had this guy in his pocket because the first thing the guy said was something to his Cobra. As it turns out, xnh found out that the comment didn't have as much to do with this guy being impressed with his car as it did with xnh still having the nozzle and hose to the gas pump hanging out of his gas tank. rofl. Needless to say, xnh did NOT get the job, and he also got to stop back at the gas station on the way home to pay for the broken gas pump AFTER he got pulled over on the freeway because the gas station had called the police when he drove off with half of their pump, and turned in xnh's license plate number on his car. When he finally got home, this somehow all became MY fault because *I* didn't wake him up on time, and I was "just trying sabotage him while making him look stupid so that he wouldn't get the job". DAMN, I must be a whole lot more talented and powerful than I thought I was!!! lol. We had a huge fight because I wouldn't apologize to him for not making sure he was up when his alarm went off. This is a "man" (loosely speaking) that was about 45 years old at the time).

______________________________________________________
God sometimes removes a person from your life for your protection. Don't run after them.

June 28, 2011 - 6:25am (Reply to #28)
Hunter
Hunter's picture

mystwoman

HAHAHAHA!
June 27, 2011 - 7:03pm (Reply to #27)
lisalisa47
lisalisa47's picture

LOL

I LOVE that story...Good for you for sticking to your guns while with him. I only wish I had been more forthcoming about sticking to mine...

LML

June 27, 2011 - 3:41pm (Reply to #26)
Erali
Erali's picture

Oh. My. God.

Oh. My. God.
June 27, 2011 - 1:14am
Puzzle
Puzzle's picture

Great post, I have so many.

Great post, I have so many. I laughed at your and Erali I have a similar one to you. When I met my N he had booked a trip overseas solo, we kept in touch and he came back 3 months later and called me that day to go out on a date. He told me he was going to work in London as soon as possible and that I should come, I said I would think about it. I told him I wanted to go and for about 4 months he never mentioned it again. I went on facebook one day and he had finally accepted my friends request. Some girls he used to live with had written "Can't wait to see you in 2 weeks" I was floored. He had booked his ticket and not told me. I confronted him and he made up some shit about frequent flyer points. We had been dating for about 6 months at this stage and were bf and gf. He then sent me an email telling me that we could go as friends, but not do everything together and not live together and maybe travel some places together MAYBE. I was gutted. So I said seeya later, booked a ticket overseas, booked a trip to October fest, 3 weeks in spain, croatia etc.....I told him and he said "I want to go with you, I thought we would plan some stuff together..." What a fruit cake!
June 27, 2011 - 3:43pm (Reply to #24)
Erali
Erali's picture

Yep, this is very similar to

Yep, this is very similar to my story. F'ing hell. I have no problems traveling alone, but when you're invited by who you think is your boyfriend, then they say, maybe we can hang out once in a while when we're both there? That's mental.
June 26, 2011 - 11:16pm
IncognitoBurrito
IncognitoBurrito's picture

Odd? Well...

He'd mail me second-hand things as gifts. Nobody's ever done that to me before. Once, it was an old, but really cool, jacket. I got a kick out of it! Sometimes, the items were old, like 5-10 years or more. Always something endearing, something that tied us, via common interests. I didn't mind, I'm as sentimental as anyone. I thought it was sweet, how he could relate to me, so I thought! I took it as a compliment, to have a neat piece of somebody's history in my hands. That doesn't happen everyday. However, I don't remember him ever actually purchasing anything, brand new, and gifting that. He probably couldn't be bothered to buy me something top of the line. That, or I suppose he couldn't afford to. It's fine, everybody's different. It was just a new thing to me.
June 26, 2011 - 10:25pm
NeverAgain115
NeverAgain115's picture

OMG - He Truly Did This!!!

Hi all - I can't even begin to tell you what comfort I take from this Board, however, I'm starting to think my narc might win all of the "how bad is your narc" prizes!! It's alright - I'm mostly recovered! In the spirit of the post - I just had to share....my narc showed up at my home (husband and kids inside) and declared the following: "I AM GOD AND U AND NO-ONE ELSE SHOULD FORGET THAT!!!!" I was enraged, but had to keep myself together, as he is the doctor that has truly pulled my youngest son out of the grips of autism - I am trapped and I know it. A mother will take any abuse in order to allow her child a normal existence! I also just lost my high level job on Friday because of him - please help, I know I need to post my story to explain all! Thank you fellow gals/guys!! I need your input!!
June 26, 2011 - 7:37pm
onwithmylife
onwithmylife's picture

My EXNARC

said the dumbest things to me, like i was smothering him because i wanted an intimate relationship,tried to leave me whenever things were going really well, tried to talk with him on a deeper level, impossible, treated me like a chair often when i came over to his place, felt like a prostitute without getting paid,sent me real juvenile cards for birthdays, he was like a child who never grew up into a man, so emotionally immature,stood in a crowd for my graduation and looked like a lost little boy, did not know how to mingle at all, the list is endless, had zero social skills
June 27, 2011 - 5:30pm (Reply to #20)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

More social awkwardness

When I met the ex-Psych prof's girlfriend at a concert, she&I had a nice conversation. The ex-P didn't bother introducing her to his colleagues. What did he do? Go running down the stairs. His girlfriend, who had moved all the way from Los Angeles to be with him, went running down the stairs when she realized he had abandoned her. In front of everyone. After she left, I calmly told his colleagues, "Mr. T--- didn't tell me he already had a girlfriend." There was a moment of silence.
June 26, 2011 - 8:29pm (Reply to #19)
Susan32
Susan32's picture

He didn't need me to humiliate him...

He did it on his own! When I introduced the ex-Psych prof to my mother&sister at graduation, he was AWKWARD, at one point bragging about reading St. Augustine's "Confessions" in the original Latin. Ironically, the ex-P envied my skills in foreign languages. Understanding another's language requires empathy, context, etc. He didn't even get BASIC SLANG. I would LOVE to see the ex-P's father explain "ROFLMAO" and "LMFAO" to him. If he were on MySpace/Facebook, he'd be getting majorly pranked. He was awkward around my friends, his colleagues, he makes my Narc grandmother and my former Narc boss look like socialites/normal people.