They Do It JUST to Manipulate You

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Aug 29 - 4PM (Reply to #6)
quietude (not verified)
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creepy

Wow, that was very creepy! I have a great example in one photo where we were taking pics together, just bored and being silly. I am giggling my head off, and my eyes were all squinty. He managed somehow to give the cold stare when the flash went off. There were several like this. Once you're aware of the 'reptilian' stare, you start recognizing it in photos too. It's freaky. It's like their eyes are dead. I remember he commented several times on my photos as what stood out most to him was 'the love in my eyes'. Things that make you go "hmmmm"! He'd stare me down to as well, many times just not answering my question, but just starting at me. I always thought, WTF is that about?? Now I know!
Aug 29 - 4PM (Reply to #7)
James (not verified)
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For sure!!

Yes quietude, It really creep me out when I learned about this myself. I guess I just never notice it before other then the "smirk"! That I remember all too well for I began to see it on her face many times. Yes very very creepy! http://james-personalitydisorder.blogspot.com/
Aug 29 - 5PM (Reply to #18)
dolce (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

I remember the stare now

I thought he only did the creepy "smirk", but I just remembered the reptilian stare. He only did it once. He had had a few drinks. I sat to watch Tv. He was behind me, in the kitchen, sitting at the table in the dark. I felt something weird and turned around and put on the light. He was staring at me as if he could kill me. And we werent fighting or anything. I thought we were just chillin out. Who knows what he was thinking about, but it was downright creepy. He said it was because he didnt feel well..because of the alcohol. Chilling. Can't believe I forgot that.
Aug 29 - 5PM (Reply to #8)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

the 'trying too hard' smile

then of course that's that sh*t eating grin, i.e. Psycho-Boy (this is the site where I exposed his whole game) Check the 2 pictures on this post -- enjoy! http://cyberpaths.blogspot.com/2007/06/jgridney-yidwithlid-moves-to-next-level.html ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck
Aug 30 - 8AM (Reply to #16)
dolce (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

more of the stare

My memory is truly coming back on this topic of the stare. In the very beginning of our relationship he would sit across the table with me and give me that stare. It lasted much longer than I was comfortable with and went on for months. I'd ask him to stop and he'd say he was just enamored with me. Couldnt stop looking at me. This "in love look"(as he described it)....that was the stare, wasn't it? Like I said he only did it at the beginning and then, never again when he turned the tables on me and became the creep.
Aug 30 - 1PM (Reply to #17)
James (not verified)
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dolce

This "in love look"(as he described it)....that was the stare, wasn't it? If it was me (being study and size up) I would say yes. This gaze is easily mistaken for infatuation but really the subject (victim) action and reaction is what is really being noted and studied by the sociopaths. Also people of the lie of are always looking for any weakness and flaws which is also being noted for future information on the victim. The stare is a violation of personal space with allow the person to test how far you will allow him/her to violate your personal space i.e boundaries. "In the book Violent Attachments, women and men have noted the particular stare of the psychopath - it is an intense, relentless gaze that seems to preclude his destruction of his victim or target. Women, in particular, have reported this stare, which is related to the "predatorily" (reptilian) gaze; it is as if the psychopath is directing all of his intensity toward you through his eyes, a sensation that one woman reported as a feeling of "being eaten." They tend to invade peoples' space either by their sudden intrusions or intimidating look-overs (which some women confuse for sexuality.)" http://james-personalitydisorder.blogspot.com/2009/05/predatorily-reptilian-gaze.html
Aug 29 - 11PM (Reply to #9)
quietude (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

grin

Barbara, that's a good description of that 'smile' for sure! That's a great site...can you look people up too like some other sites? I may be blind and just missed it...
Aug 30 - 12AM (Reply to #10)
Rose-Marie (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

James

Thanks for the posting. It is only seeing these photographs I now realise what I was dealing with. After the ex N and I met for the first time I had to take the train to get home and he took me to the station. As I turned round to see if he had gone I saw that he was still standing there staring at me and I was so flattered thinking it was because he really liked me. I am now aware that this was the reptilian stare. If I had known then what I know now, I would never have gone back. He stood and stared at me in the same way when I walked out on him, and later when he discarded me. I hope I will never be on the receiving end of such a stare again. Rosy
Aug 30 - 4AM (Reply to #11)
James (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Rose-Marie

I exactly had one poster (Man) that asked me if this was a joke with concerns in relationship to the Reptilian gaze. I had to assure him that it wasn’t a joke and that many people know about it. I did my own research asking for pictures from posters and people I corresponded with and I saw the same look again and again. No people this is no joke but in fact a very strong trait they will display. It also falls under trying to hypnotizes someone and/or put them into a emotional trance of physical attraction. This explain why some people feel as if they are being “eaten alive”. One well know monk named *Grigori Yefimovich Rasputin (1869-1916) was well know for his sexual power over the females of his day. The Mad Monk was also know for his sexual appetite and manipulated prowess over his many converts. The Mad Monk of a person who excelled in his pathological persona. Also to note this man was deeply hated and which was displayed by the way he finally died. Only a true psychopath has this ability to create this type of hate and retribution. * http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rasputin
Aug 30 - 5AM (Reply to #12)
Rose-Marie (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

James

I have to say that in the beginning he did not stare into my eyes, so I could not say that he was trying to "hypnotise" me in any way. I just happened to turn round to wave as I was leaving him and was surprised to see him rooted to the spot staring at me. Another occasion I had fallen asleep in the chair and when I woke up he was standing staring at me and accused me of falling asleep, as if it was something I had done deliberately and he was annoyed about it. I got used to this expression on his face and knew whenever I saw it that I had done something to annoy him, so I would say the stare was as a result of his annoyance rather than being used in any "hypnotic" sense - so would this count? The first N had a reptilian stare when he was scared. Rosy
Aug 30 - 5AM (Reply to #13)
Rose-Marie (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Stare

James, I just extracted this from another article and I think it covers what I asked you,. Rosy Once you are in a relationship with an N, they stare at you in order to control you. Their withering glare is meant to cow you into submission. It is a strong woman indeed who does not back down under the malevolent narcissistic stare.
Aug 30 - 5AM (Reply to #14)
James (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

It's all about control

Yes, Rose-Marie for every effort and action of manipulation for them is all about some type of control. Interesting enough is not all people can be put under or hypnotized. Also of interests is being hypnotized is more of an suggested state of mind more so then a control state of subconsciousness. It's a know fact that even under an suggested state of hypnotized subconsciousness a person would never do anything they believed is wrong or immoral in a consciousness state of mind. I believe people really give more credit i.e. power too sociopaths then they deserve. These people do have some power over their victims but never to the point of losing all of our free will. The victim does have the power of free choice and will if only they come to acknowledge it and realize this ability in themselves. http://james-personalitydisorder.blogspot.com/
Aug 31 - 12AM (Reply to #15)
Rose-Marie (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Remembering

Before he met me the Ex N had a couple of dates with a lady he met on line. He said to me "she wouldn't even look me in the eyes" and then stopped returning his 'phone calls. She was a smarter woman than I was! Rosy