Everyone told me what a good guy he was

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#1 Jul 1 - 11PM
Jodie
Jodie's picture

Everyone told me what a good guy he was

Before we even started dating his friends and even a few of my friends told me what a wonderful guy he was, how he came from this great family, is a professional athlete and has a great job. To this day his friends genuinely think he's wonderful. I ran into someone the other night who professionally fights with my husband and told me, "Hes a great guy!" My friends think he is Satan himself and my family despises him. Why does everyone else think he's wonderful including friends of his he's known for years?

Jul 2 - 12AM
jenn99 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

normal

this isnt just narcissism...it happens with lots of people...the wolf in sheep's clothign who everyone loves and praises...abusers are only that way towards their nearest/dearest...andppl they can do that too and get away with...not everyone...those who don't experience it aren't going to say bad abt it...theres always someone out there who you like who could be an abuser to someone else, you would never know it
Jul 1 - 11PM
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

i would bet...

He's still got them in his thrall. and I would bet he isn't as CLOSE to them as you think... some reading for you: http://narc-attack.blogspot.com/2007/08/power-of-suggestion-on-bystanders.html http://narc-attack.blogspot.com/2007/04/ugly-bystander.html http://narc-attack.blogspot.com/2008/01/narcissist-sympathizers.html http://narc-attack.blogspot.com/2007/07/narcissist-sympathizers.html http://narc-attack.blogspot.com/2007/12/rewards-of-befriending-narcissist.html ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Free articles & information for abuse victims: http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com Effective Coaching for Victims of Pathologicals http://one2one4victims.webs.com/
Jul 2 - 7AM (Reply to #3)
Fawn
Fawn's picture

Thanks barbara

These helped me. I keep trying to understand why the stupid babysitter us still with him -and why she sees me as the bad guy, even knowing that he abandoned and abused me during cancer treatment. This helps. Eveyine else sees him for what be is now because of his behavior, not neccessarily as a narcissist, but as a "jerk" or "pervert" or just as a "complete idiot". The babysitter us going way overboard to try and make him feel good about himself& has from the beginning. Her notes to him were full of praise, telling him whatva "good & worthy man" he is. My kids are at his apartment now and my 14-year old texted me to tell me that he (or she) left a gift certificate out in the living room on the coffee table to a spa for a massage. It was addressed "to my wonderful man" from (babysitter). Why does he continue to leave this shot out for my kids to see? It really made her mad and hurt her. They are with him until July 15. She is miserable, I am going out of town. She HAS to stay there with him, according to my attorney.
Jul 5 - 4PM (Reply to #4)
Lisa E. Scott
Lisa E. Scott's picture

Jodie & Dcrutche

Jodie - People think he's great because he has charmed them and they are still under his spell. Trust me, people eventually see a narcisist for who he is once they get to know him. Those people are in for a rude awakening. Dcrutche - I cannot believe how he and his babysitter parade their relationship around your kids. I'm so sorry. I hope the 15th comes quickly for you and your kids. Hang in there!
Jul 1 - 11PM (Reply to #2)
Jodie
Jodie's picture

Thanks

Good reads! "Cry now because you lost him or cry later because you have him."

"Cry now because you lost him or cry later because you have him."