The Narcissist and Intimacy

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#1 Aug 28 - 5PM
marriedtoanarcissist
marriedtoanarcissist's picture

The Narcissist and Intimacy

I have recently realized that I married a narcissist. His narcissistic tendencies were not apparent at first - but after 2 years of marriage I am positive that this is my current situation.

I was listening to the "Narcissist and Intimacy" episode and a lot of what was said struck a chord. His sarcasm and hurtful words outside of the bedroom as well as his actions in bed have made me increasingly uncomfortable with having sex with him.

I am completely uncomfortable with some of the things he asks me to do in bed, how there's no foreplay, how there's no intimacy or emotional connection during sex, how he tells me what to say while we're having sex (e.g. "Tell me your my whore), and how he has never once asked me what feels good. Essentially, my inability to be turned on by him at this stage has made sex uncomfortable and physically painful. We haven't had sex in a year. I have an appointment with a pain specialist in a couple of days to "diagnose" the issue, but I think it's that sex is so forced and unpleasant that my body is resisting.

My husband is my first and only sexual partner, so honestly I have nothing else to compare this to. I have no idea if what I'm saying sounds crazy. If he has the right to be angry with me, making comments like, "I never thought I'd be in a sexless marriage", or "According to the bible women are not supposed to withold sex from men." Honestly I'm not doing any of this on purpose. I just don't feel loved, I feel no emotional connection, and surely no intimacy. How can I be turned on and have sex with someone who hurts me so often? And is he being mean, hurtful and sarcastic because we aren't having sex?

Any insight you can provide would be very much appreciated.

Aug 12 - 11AM
Deidre40
Deidre40's picture

You don't need an appt with a

You don't need an appt with a pain specialist. You need an appt with a lawyer. Seriously. Forced painful sex? This is called abuse...I'm not dismissing marriage...but I wouldn't stay married to an abusive man.
Aug 12 - 11AM
greengirl91
greengirl91's picture

"Tell me you`re my

"Tell me you`re my whore"..yuck. I mean..if there was a funny sort of game, and you were allowed to say after "Yes Mr Bastard" or something Equally fun, yes! Oh, but I forgot, with those there is never..equally.
Aug 31 - 10PM
cupcake (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Read! from Cupcake

hey Barbara, I found that before it helped so much! Espcially seeing that long distance they can still be cold and distant. Guys I am stuck on something else from educating myself here. Oh how I wish I had found this site a year ago when I was 'with him'. It could have saved me a lot of dignity lost. I should never have told her. Because it brought them closer together, it gave him attention he gets to tell her I am a pyscho and it says here that they really try and pursure you when they are exposed or try to leave you. He would have been so scared she found out what he was doing so he would have tried extra hard with her. All I did Barbara was push them closer togehter, lose him (not a big deal) and lose my dingity (a big deal for me) and self respect. He hates my and thinks I am nuts. I wish I got the last word, just walked away calmly. And I am hoping that once he has her secure again he will rever back to old ways but they are long distance now so it is easier for him, she is not in his space so she is not a threat. I wish I did nothing, because he would have really have tried to play the good guy now! For her.
Aug 31 - 10PM (Reply to #21)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

cupcake

don't worry she'll find out the hard way. You did something a lot of women do. He's probably also scared you'll expose him on the web so all the other women he's got will know... and future targets. So please DO IT - he already thinks you're psycho and WHO CARES ABOUT THE OPINION OF A PATHOLOGICAL & A PATHOLOGICAL'S G.F. I told Psycho-Boy's wife. Until I took out a C&D a year ago, she helped him for over 4 year harass me and threaten me & my children. He even told his parents I was a crazed stalker and talked a buddy of his with the police to harass me. But I heard that recently he lost ANOTHER job and while she makes good money I am sure she isn't too appreciative of footing his bills for almost a year now. My Spidey-senses tell me there's trouble in paradise... he's been on his blog BEGGING FOR MONEY! And other bloggers are starting to write me saying "WTF is wrong with him? He did xyz to me..." I would do it again. It took years but I know I will have an I TOLD YOU SO MOMENT. It took longer than I would have liked but now I am just sitting back and say "Maybe I'm Psycho but at least I'm not saddled with that freak!" you keep LOOKING at this as if it was a NORMAL break up. IT WASN'T. Narcs have everyone around them IN THEIR THRALL. Hypnotized and controlled. Of course she wasn't going to believe you - she's been programmed NOT TO believe anyone but him. Poor her. Believing a pathological... ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck
Aug 31 - 11PM (Reply to #22)
cupcake (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Thanks Barbara

Thank you that helped! Wow I'm so sorry that happened to you. Were you able to charge them if she was threatening you? That is awful after everything you have been through - it just kept coming! If I had known she wasn't going to believe me I never would have done it, I wish I had found this site first or been in therapy first. You are right. My therapist said that even if she does believe nay part of it she will block it from her mind, the same as I did when I suspected he had a girlfriend. I didn't know for sure but because I was so into him I blocked it from my mind too. I'm glad you thikn they will find out the hard way. I need her to come back, marry or move in with him and know. How could she not konw? He was with me SO much! Sometimes all weekend messaging me every night of the week. I guess if I was that girlfriend that would be happening to me. He wouldn't be having sex with me - he would find another cupcake for supply! And I read your other post, I think you are right about him having other women already. He can't survive without us he is that weak! Thanks Barabara. I am full of regret and wish I could have just walked away calmly and left him wondering but I guess hindsight is a blessing and a curse!
Sep 1 - 6AM (Reply to #23)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

cupcake

she didn't block anything - your therapist might not understand that Narcs and Ps ACTUALLY DO HYPNOTIZE, BRAINWASH and MIND CONTROL their victims! So she's 'under his spell' http://www.lisaescott.com/forum/2009/03/28/am-i-under-his-spell Oh I tried to charge them - their buddies in the Precinct blocked it. Finally I took out a c&d and posted a site about him and the whole experience so that the truth would be out there: http://thestumblingblock.wordpress.com His victim in California posted him on every exposure site there was. www.dontdatehimgirl.com www.playerblock.com www.stoptheact.com www.liarscheatsandbastards.com www.peepsheet.com He's still smearing me but not attacking. Once his Precinct got a copy of that C&D they went and 'had a chat' with him and his wife. He still hates me. I still wonder what he's going to do - 5 years later. But I have gone on with my life - I am speaking my truth. Don't forget - I had a NarcMother, 3 NBoyfriends, 2 Sociopath boyfriends (one of them tried to kill me twice) and numerous NarcBosses as well as an exNH. It took me until I was 44 to piece it all together. I even had a therapist who made me write a series of letters to one of my exNs - which of course made me look psycho. Oh well... HIS loss as far as I am concerned. He can say what he wants - I have gone on - he is stuck in Narc-ville. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck
Aug 31 - 8PM
baddream
baddream's picture

Pretend guy pretends intimacy

I had a long distance relationship with mine and that is why we were able to last 8 years. After some time apart we would finally get together. Sometimes that could be several months as we live on opposite sides of the country. (it wasn't always that way) During the days preceding our "reunion" he would sound like the old sweet pretend guy--very nice, romantic, say all the right things. When we would finally get together it would be very charged (sexually) with either one of us getting off a plane, running into each others arms, not keeping our hands off each other. Yes, exactly like some kind of MOVIE. We would find ourselves in bed, catching up after all that time, and the first couple of times seemed like a normal guy. Okay, so far it sounds like Mr. Wonderful, right?? A day or two goes by, and it is like DR. JEKYL , MR. HYDE. His behavior in the bedroom makes a 180.... He starts to get mechanical, wants all the attention on him, gets rough, and keeps going and going. Just won't stop. During sex he makes NO eye contact, prefers to be behind me with my face pushed into a pillow so there is no possibility of eye contact--one time he almost suffocated me. It was like being raped, and he weighs double what I do, much larger than me I am a small woman. The last time we were together that is what he did. I will never forget it. He had no interest in "love making", I had become his whore. We said good bye, I went home, and he started to call telling me how much he missed me. Now I know he has been with another woman for the last 5 years while we were having this long distance relationship. I often wonder if my only role was to be his whore, and if she is the Madonna. Perhaps he withholds from her all together. I have spent hours thinking about the sex angle and wondering if that is all I ever was for him. Funny, but I usually remember the good sex with him, and not the "rape" sessions, even thought the latter far outnumbered the former. I am so sorry to read some of the stories of others on this thread. It seems so many of them get off on putting us in humiliating and subservient positions and control us physically and emotionally in this manner. Yes, it is abuse of our bodies and our spirits.
Sep 6 - 11PM (Reply to #19)
cynthia (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

LD Relationship too

During sex he makes NO eye contact, prefers to be behind me with my face pushed into a pillow so there is no possibility of eye contact-- All alike arent they? Mine only did what positions HE liked, didnt much care what I wanted, its like they go into a crazed sex act or something, something I am very certain most dont do with the GF, so many of the GF and wives have stated the sex wasnt very often always had an excuse, thats because they probably masturbate all the time or as my counselor said they have to fantasize dirty sex in their mind so they can get it up in order to have sex half the time with anyone not just wives and GF. Funny In the beginning I thought how lucky his gf must be because he was so gentle, kind, romantic charming, ha ha my counselor laughed and said do you think they sit around in front of a fireplace and cuddle and he comes home after work and showers her with charm and romance? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING he said, half the time he doesnt want her there and makes excuses and LIES to her all the time so he can get his freedom, when she gets pissy he will put on the act and charm and give her another dose and that is the cycle, some last for a number of years but many dont, many want more that what he ever will give them and if they wine too much and question he will discard them real fast. THe Gf's that stay around for years are so brainwashed and in love with them they would rather die than not see them so they stay, they are miserable but they stay. Since I was a LD thing for him for three years its not probably fair for me to judge anyone that lives with them and tolerates their behavior, I just dont know how they can endure it. Maybe some know they cheat and just close their eyes to it, narcs and psychos are people you get addicted to very easily and not just sexually, in other ways their presence mesmerizes you I cant explain it, you are in a trance and under a spell and I truly believe that, if that werent the case we would be running so fast knowing how sick they are instead we struggle thru NC even knowing how dangerous they are, they are very very addictive people to get close to and its usually very very very hard to break away from them.
Sep 6 - 8PM (Reply to #17)
Heart
Heart's picture

Oh, the Similarities!

I too had a long distance relationship with an N who is now by STBX husband of ten years. Two months after we married, I moved 500 miles to live with him. I gave up my job, my apartment and my alimony from my ex-first N husband. Within two weeks of moving in,he stopped having sex with me, or would occasionally. I tried to seduce him all the time, but he was " tired" or " had a headache" etc. I also could get the Silent Treatment; or he would be Dr.Jekyll/Hyde. It turned out the I was the Madonna. Now that we are divorcing ( his idea) he calls me and tells me le loves me and misses me, but we can't be together. I am so angry at myself for staying for the abuse for so long. I understand what you have experienced.
Sep 7 - 7PM (Reply to #18)
cupcake (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

Hey Heart & Cynthia

Hey you amazing brave strong people! Hope everything is going ok, I guess day by day. Just reading your posts and it is helping so much. I think you experience married people are amazing to come on here and tell your storties, it helps people like me who were not married to a N (but wanted to be) and I think I have been saved from a lifetime of misery and pain. 2 weeks Heart? 2 weeks after moving in with you he stopped having sex? That is awful I'm so sorry that happened to you. At least you know it was nothing to do with you it was all about him. Cynthia was talking of how the only really want yo uwhen you are leaving them, does everyone agree? I guess your story proves it too. You gave up so much Heart for him, moved, gave up your life and that is how he treated you how dare he. Can I ask how long the silent treatment would last in marriage? Mine was a cycle of 2 weeks but I was just the mistress. It is awful. He would even come back apologizng for being silent but expect me to be there. Cynthia you are right. They are addictive. Very addictive these people and when I was with him it was like being with a famous persono he gave out such a good feeling I wanted that all the time. Because he pushed and pulled hot and cold and was Jekyll/Hyde everytime he came back I was so happy ande xcited I would just mp straight back in with him after telling myself I would not. These men are dangerous.
Aug 31 - 10PM (Reply to #16)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

cupcake - please read

I hope you read what baddream has said here - it mirrors a lot of your relationship with your Narc. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck
Aug 31 - 11AM
cynthia (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

similar experience

during sex also experienced the same thing you did, mine would say, tell me I am your whore baby, and tell me to F--k you real loud, and scream too, all just sick words like we were in a porn flick or something, I mean a little bit is fun but that was too much. Withhold sex? Many prefer to masturbate for self gratification than to put any effort into pleasing a partner they are so in love with themselves you know and I have read some Narcs can go months and months without sex, they use sex for power and control to get us under their spell, and gee if we behave and comply there is more of that where that came from baby, ya right can hardly wait for all the passion puke, I once felt he was the greatest sexual partner I ever had, if that is all you want, sure they will service you but there will never be caring, sharing, pleasing, on any level ever with them, and as I weigh what is more important in my life I dont enjoy being serviced from some pimp who is just acting in bed and all areas of his life, give me something that is REAL, what he gave me will never sustain me in the long run
Aug 30 - 11AM
nhtmf
nhtmf's picture

Pain

Don't know it this will help or not but there is an actual name for the pain you feel during sex with the N. The unfortunate part is I can't remember what its called. Experienced the same pain with my ex-husband. Not and N but that pain happened to me just because I did not want to have sex with him for other reasons. This was 24 years ago and thought "what's wrong with me" because I had never had that happen before. Did some research and found the name and that I wasn't alone. I does hurt like crazy though, very painful. Never experienced it again, so it should go away for you as well when you get rid of "the problem". Deb
Aug 30 - 3PM (Reply to #13)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

marriedtoanarcissist: - pain

I hope you TELL the doctor he's abusive. It's important that the doctors records also document the abuse. and see a lawyer - your only problem is him ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck
Aug 30 - 10AM
Carolyn
Carolyn's picture

You can't. I recently was

You can't. I recently was listening to a very inappropriate conversation in a restaurant and the man was telling his female companion that the males in his ethnic group are known for their strong,foreceful, physical ability in bed and that most women thought he was the king of the bedroom. I think that woman was about to be physically hurt if she went along with him. I would have laughed at the KING and left. maybe you should be talking to a lawyer instead of a doctor. It is hard to begin the process of leaving but the doctor that you are going to might be helpful and direct you to a sexual abuse counselor. you are very brave and as you gather information about what is happening to you then you can make decisions that will help you protect yourself.
Aug 28 - 8PM
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

narcissists - sexually twisted - zero intimacy

welcome (to the club none of us want to be in) First please go to MY BLOG on the left and read through all the entries Then go to MESSAGE BOARD on the left and cruise through all the pages. Your question has been asked & answered many times. I'll give you a few links but there's LOADS more on this site. http://allabouthim.com/the-narcissists-madonnawhore-complex/ http://allabouthim.com/why-a-narcissist-cannot-love/ http://www.lisaescott.com/forum/2008/05/28/are-narcissists-warped-sexually http://www.lisaescott.com/forum/2009/03/16/sex-narcissists-and-it-just-sex Listen to our free radio show episodes: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/allabouthim oh yeah - using the 'Bible' against you - demanding & withholding sex... they are such freaks, liars, users & abusers. that "pain" is your body's way of saying it's sick of the Marital Rape. You'd be better off to see a therapist ALONE - who gets it about Narcs and helps you develop an exit plan. you will have to leave this person if you want to keep your humanity & sanity intact at all ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck
Aug 28 - 8PM (Reply to #2)
marriedtoanarcissist
marriedtoanarcissist's picture

Re: - narcissists - sexually twisted - zero intimacy

Barbara, Thank you for your comments and the links. I have been exploring the site for several hours now, and am amazed how my husband's behavior mirrors that spoken of by site members, as well as in the audio episodes. Can you explain what you mean by "marital rape"? He doesn't force me to have sex with him. Although, having sex is not enjoyable for me at all which is definitely not a concern for him. He makes me feel bad that we aren't intimate or will make backhanded comments/insults with regards to the lack of activity in the bedroom. If you or anyone else could elaborate on "marital rape" that would be great.
Aug 28 - 9PM (Reply to #3)
grossot
grossot's picture

My N never "forced" me

My N never "forced" me either. It's hypnotism. That's right! Please don't think I'm crazy - read on. If I failed to please him more than 1 night/day, I got the silent treatment. I felt somehow, through no conversation we ever had, that if I didn't have sex with him at the drop of a hat, I could be replaced in a heartbeat. He played games. In one game, I was expected to stay under the kichen table for an hour naked and whenever he sat at the table I was to give him a BJ while he surfed for porn on the laptop. When you feel emotionally violated, as if you are an object, it's marital rape. When you feel you can't discuss the issue with him for fear of his reaction, it's marital rape. When he doesn't care that you are choking because he is pushing your face into his groin, it's marital rape. When you feel you have to, or else, it's marital rape. This is abuse. It's not easy to see. Your body tenses up because you are not in a natural loving circumstance. Listen to your body! I only listed specific examples because I thought it might help you think of some specifics from your past with him. These are things a counselor will want to be aware of. Just because the things I listed may not have happened in your situation, there are things I'm sure you were subjected to that you need to remember to start the recovery process. nolongercontrolled
Aug 29 - 5AM (Reply to #10)
survived (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

survived

hi grossot, i read your post,and felt so sick for you, about the sex, inaway i dont even feel i should be complaining about my ex, he done nothing compared to what woman on this board have gone, verbal abuse ,perverted sex talk, lying,deciet you name it he said it, even admited i was lucky he hadnt raped me, when he used to be at my home[i have a family] no one who want to mess me, so though they didnt know about him for the last 2 years, he knows what would have done, no wonder he kept saying to me,quote] you dont know how lucky you are, your god and family protect you without you even relizing,when i read these posts i know what he ment, i feel for you all. but considar my self a very lucky woman. hope you dont mind me writing to you, your post,so touched me.
Aug 28 - 9PM (Reply to #7)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

marriedtoanarcissist

grossot is EXACTLY right - they use things to control us, screw with our minds to get what they want. the silent treatment withholding sex whining & begging this will also help: http://www.outofthefogsite.com/CommonBehaviors.html http://www.outofthefogsite.com/Relationships/Chosen.html (the only thing about that site I disagree with - is I do NOT believe you can be co-dependent with a Narc. I have learned they use mind control, hypnosis & your own hormones to lure you & lock you into these relationships where they use & abuse you afterward - at will) If he's wanting, begging or guilting you into sex when you don't feel sexual towards him (and who does when they've been abused) it's MARITAL RAPE. That is because Narc have ZERO emotions - to them everyone is an object and sex is just sex - it's a way to keep you bonded but to them it's NOTHING. the BIGGEST thing Narcs use to get what they want (whether its sex, attention, etc) is FOG - Fear, Obligation & Guilt. And make no mistake - IT'S ABUSE! Click on SHARE YOUR STORY and start reading other's stories - you will be astounded. And the people on this board are the tip of the iceberg of victims out there. Keep reading the MY BLOG and MESSAGE BOARD pages as well. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. B
Aug 31 - 1PM (Reply to #8)
Chloe
Chloe's picture

Cerebral Narcissist vs. Somatic Narcissist

I was married to the "cerebral narcissist," the one who generates his Narcissistic supply by using his mind, not his body (which would be somatic--who uses sex to conquer and secure); however, both prefer masterbation to adult/mature/emotional sex (intimacy). The cerebral narcissist is more often celebate or is mechanic about sex, as opposed to the somatic narcissist who uses other people's bodies to masterbate. Both cerebral and somatic should not be typecast as just "cerebral" or just "somatic," however, when I say "cerebral" that is his dominant side, his recessive would be somatic. Sounds awful even writing all of this because I too am a victim of these kinds of abuse, which means I feel for all of you and totally understand what you are feeling and even questioning. All your questions are worth understanding, and what you need to understand first and foremost is that you are not wrong. To the woman who had to "play games" waiting for the cue from her husband as she waited under the table (naked), that is not only conquer/security in a relationship, that is out and out abuse. My husband would "moan and groan," wimper like a baby when I came near him. At first I thought he was only kidding. One time I ignored his wimpering and kept making my pass (for a lack of better way of putting it), when suddenly, this man turned into this monster, like man into warewolf, and began raging like a maniac, instantaneously, he pushed me so hard that I fell on the floor. It was awful! There were so many different versions for putting me off: definite silent treatment (common practice), cause a fight before..., wimper-moan,totally ignored, fall asleep, stay in the other room, and on and on and on. The only time when he was interested and actually gave me a little more attention than usual, was when he was DRUNK. There was that definite Madonna/whore syndrome going on. It began immediately after I married him. I had a calendar and jotted down the few times we had sex (I was in my early twenties), and I showed him that in one month, we had sex approximately three times. Is that normal for anyone, never mind a twenty-four year old? These men, cerebral/somatic are robots; they cannot and will not ever know and understand the damage they have done to the ones who love them most, and if you leave them, you are the "bad person," certainly not them!!! Who would ever want to leave them? My advice is to GO! LEAVE! Meet someone REAL. It's worth your worth as a person.
Aug 31 - 2PM (Reply to #9)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

intellectual vs. sexual

Lisa & I discuss the Intellectual N vs. the Sexual N here: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/allabouthim/2009/06/11/All-About-Him-The-Two-Types-of-Narcissists People don't believe me when I tell them my exNH hated sex. Just shows how warped they are. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ CLICK HERE: Articles & information for Narc Victims - Updated Daily "As soon as you feel that crazy sense of walking on eggshells, fending off N-rage, stop. Walk away." - Dr. M. Beck
Aug 28 - 9PM (Reply to #4)
marriedtoanarcissist
marriedtoanarcissist's picture

The Silent Treatment

Thank you for the clarification. I can relate to pretty much all of your marital rape examples to a certain extent. You mentioned the silent treatment..... My N uses the silent treatment consistently. It used to devastate me and I would try desperately to end the silence. More recently, however, I have become exhausted. I'm so sick of the cycle of him being hurtful, him making it my fault, me apologizing to regain peace only for the cycle to begin all over again. So now I just wait until he's ready to speak to me once again. My recent ability to detach myself and internalize that this is his issue not mine, makes it easier. I often wonder though how I ended up in such a dysfunctional relationship.
Sep 1 - 7AM (Reply to #6)
Chloe
Chloe's picture

To Marriedtoanarcissist

Could it be that "dysfunction" came from within your own family? Are there people who are self-centered, alcoholic, narcissists themselves who you have been raised from? We, the co-dependent/caretakers are put in these kinds of roles as children. We are perfect bait for the narcissist. It is said that anyone can fall for a narcissist, however, the "healthy-minded person" leaves these people as soon as they recognize a pattern, while those of us who continued to stay have early buried issues that really need looking into. The underlying element to good health is taking care of ourselves, peeling back the onion, dealing with our own issues, that in the end will reunite yourself with your own true self. Getting healthy is not just good for your own soul, but for those of us who have children and need to know that it is not their fault that their parent has treated them the way they have. Information/education is the key to a beginning of getting healthy from the narcissist. I started by reading everything I could about this condition. The more I read, the more I discovered the why's in my life. I read every book I could find my hands on, I read every article, and when I got weak, I read again. I could not have gotten as far as I did without the knowledge, therapy, and self-care. Today, I am much healthier and am proof that there is a road at the end of the tunnel.
Aug 28 - 10PM (Reply to #5)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

the silent treatment & brainwashing

because he lured you in and hypnotized & brain washed you to stay. YOU DID NOTHING WRONG! http://www.lisaescott.com/forum/2009/03/25/narcissism-victim-syndrome http://abuse101.com/silenttreatmentandabuse.html http://emotional-verbal-abuse.suite101.com/article.cfm/emotional_abuse_is_mental_abuse http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com/2008/10/inside-mind-of-abuser.html http://www.deeptrancenow.com/exc2_seduction.htm (scroll down on this link and read under SEDUCE... OR BE SEDUCED)