Why we are drawn to narcissists and why we are a magnet to them....

This article does a great job of describing some of us to a tee. I definitely consider myself an Empath. This article helps explain not only why we are drawn to narcissists, but why we are magnets to them as well.

"Real empaths feel too much. Real narcissists don’t seem to feel anything, or at least not in regard to others’ feelings. Showing your vulnerable side to a narcissist in an attempt to explain how his or her behavior might be hurtful will just invite more abuse."

http://www.thespiritualeclectic.com/2010/08/22/the-relationship-between-...

Nov 20 - 6PM
smokabear
smokabear's picture

if some one could tell me

if some one could tell me what is in this article,my N has K9 here and and cant get to anything but on the empath side I am one he saw that I had a heart ans used it against me he was a mastor at faking emotions and used them to manupupulate me and abuse me especially to gaslight me that was his fav,
Sep 12 - 3PM
Alibi_10
Alibi_10's picture

Empath post

This is a real eye-opener and explains so much. Thanks for posting it. It brought a bit of a tear to my eye reading about the spoiled picnic. I had so looked forward to my birthday this year ... but that was exactly the time when things went wrong. He had already told me that he never celebrates his own birthday, and thinks they are stupid. The night before my birthday, he was horrible on the phone and said he wished he was dead. He said the same thing in the morning - then wished me happy birthday. When I eventually reached his house, a long drive away (I was crying en route) - he had calmed down, but then gave me the silent treatment because he thought I had slighted him over an innocuous remark (this happened time and time again) - but I ended up thinking he must be really sad to have wished himself dead, and felt sorry for HIM !! It was an awful day. This post does put so much into perspective. Thanks again x
Sep 29 - 7AM (Reply to #2)
sunflowergrl70
sunflowergrl70's picture

Pretended alot

I figured out early on that if I pretended something wasn't important to me or acted like I could care less he would go out of his way to do something. My birthdays were always like that. He would plan ski days on my birthdays (something he loves). I loved it too and I know if I said I wanted to go skiing for my birthday he would come up with a lame excuse why we wouldn't go. One time last year I said I wanted to go skiing and suggested we take a day off to go. So we took the day off and then he decided that morning that the snow wasn't going to be good. We ended up staying home doing NOTHING all day (a waste of a vacation day). I found out later that some co-workers went up and the snow had been awesome.
Sep 16 - 10PM (Reply to #1)
Lisa E. Scott
Lisa E. Scott's picture

Alibi

I'm so glad you find this helpful. They do try to bring us down into their misery even on days when we should be celebrating. It just goes to show how they are incapable of thinking about anyone but themselves. The fact that he treated you this way on your birthday is so selfish. I'm glad now you understand why. Knowledge is power. xoxo