Comming up on a year on the 28th. Come a long way, but still have a ways to go!

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#1 Jan 11 - 2PM
gratefuljen's picture

Comming up on a year on the 28th. Come a long way, but still have a ways to go!

What I have learned:
A. It's not my fault, they trick the best in the business
B. I was primed in childhood for this to happen. I have
wounds that need to heal so I will never ever let this
happen again.
D. That I am worth so much more! Actively working on my
self esteem.
E. That not everyone has light in them. That there are
people in this world, that have only darkness.
F. To forgive myself for falling in love and marrying a
narc/psycho. To forgive myself for allowing the abuse to
occur. To forgive myself for not heeding the red flags.
G. To come to terms that my life is not a fairy tale, and
there are no prince charming our there that is going to
make me happy. I am the only person that can do that!
H. To follow directions, take suggestions about healing from
a toxic relationship. I am going to give it the full 18
months before I start to date again. MAYBE LONGER
I. I will not let this relationship taint who I am inside.
A women with a big heart. A women that believes most
most people have good inside them. Just a little better with setting and enforcing boundaries.

Jan 12 - 8AM
onwithmylife's picture


congratulations on your recovery, it sure does take time, but happy to hear you are doing so well, Time is our best friend and educating ourselves all we can.......
Jan 11 - 10PM
neonlove's picture

OMG, I bet the days, weeks

OMG, I bet the days, weeks and months just flew by. No contact becomes just like breathing, instinctual. I loved your words of wisdom! It's funny in recovery we learn new things about our ourselves, others and everything in between constantly. I think the most important thing you wrote is about giving yourself time to heal before dating. It's like our bodies, minds and souls need to recharge from zero or maybe we had negative energy, because of the N's abuse (in all forms), I think the mental abuse is the worst though because we have to live inside our heads. You are twice as right about how there are very dark souls in this world, but PRETEND just to get close to light (something I think I have and probably everyone on this board and who has been affected by narcissism), it's so so so dangerous (mostly in a figurative sense) because they really can sink their fangs into you and suck the life out of you. Keep going!!!
Jan 11 - 9PM
TNR1's picture

Wow..that's awesome!! Gives

Wow..that's awesome!! Gives me hope!! HUGS.
Jan 11 - 8PM
ruby01 (not verified)
Anonymous's picture


You are proof that pain can actually generate a growth in awareness. Congratulations!
Jan 11 - 2PM
spinning's picture

Gratefuljen, this is such an awesome

post from you! You have walked the rocky road and are in the light at the end! I know how hard this has been for you. You have done the work and are now feeling the awesome rewards. I love this and every word you say here is true. Congratulations on your accomplishment, Gratefuljen. You are an inspiration. Most sincerely, (not) spinning. AND IT FEELS GREAT


Jan 11 - 2PM
Done sourcing
Done sourcing's picture

The abc's of recovery. Very

The abc's of recovery. Very nicely put, and congrats on the upcoming anniversary! ds
Jan 11 - 2PM
Hunter's picture

Jen, You rock. Hunter

Jen, You rock. Hunter
Jan 11 - 2PM (Reply to #2)
gratefuljen's picture

Hunter, you have helped me more than anyone else on

site. Thank you.
Jan 11 - 9PM (Reply to #3)
Hunter's picture

You're welcome.. You always

You're welcome.. You always say that.. I don't even know what I did. Jen we were in it together.. Not a pleasant experience .. I'm glad it's almost behind us.. Hunter