did I mention how important it is to not snoop on fb

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#1 Apr 1 - 4PM
jen79
jen79's picture

did I mention how important it is to not snoop on fb

I am the one to blame, I did it, but at least I have my last proof what liar he is. I fuckin liar. I am so mad I dont even know what to say, only this, I am mad at myself that he occupied my mind cause I wasnt sure if I should believe him, feeling guilty, letting his toxic words come to my heart and doubt myself.

Now again he seems to be back with his ex (stupid stupid girl). But its ok, only confirms all what I have picked up, all the unspoken words, all the vibes I got, all the pictures popping up in my mind. Never ever will I doubt myself again. I dont give a fuck if anyone calls me crazy, I will never ever doubt the things that I feel and see, even if I have no proof for it, even if it is supernatural whatever.

I have my proof now, he is nothing more than a piece of shit, a liar, and manipulator, soulless and I will never ever even allow myself for one second out of compassion and hoping the best to let this devil get one foot in my life again.

Apr 2 - 8AM
shortway2
shortway2's picture

When I felt he was cheating I

When I felt he was cheating I made up a facebook page with his same last name and friended him.I knew he would accept because he accepts people with the same last name from different countries etc.Upon this I was able to see who he was cheating on me with and the timeline..i figured everything out.I also made up a fake page that she accdepted because it had to do with her college.Yes I am slick.i even put pictures up of the college etc..Dumbasses!!!..I figured out everything from this.I shut the one page down..but his I kept snooping on..No reason to except to get hurt!..I know everything I need to know now..FB is good and bad at the same time..
Apr 2 - 3AM
jen79
jen79's picture

thanks ladies for your responses

I slept quite well. I dreamed all night about him but nothing romantic, thank god. I am done with him. He is dead for me. HE IS DEAD FOR ME. No more no contact and counting days. I am just done. Today is day 1 of my new life. He never existed. And I will erase him from my mind until I cannot even remember his last name. And today I woke up and I didnt look on my block app if he contacted me right away, cause I will never look on this app ever again. He is dead forever. Dead. Thanks ladies, for letting me vent.
Apr 1 - 6PM
gettinbetter
gettinbetter's picture

This right after he wante to

This right after he wanted to "work things out" wasnt that only two weeks ago? Jen its so amazing. I dont care that hes getting married. I mean Im starting to think that was a lie too. I mean he has a picture up on classmates of him and the other EX girlfriend. Do You do that if you are getting married??? I mean really? He is so careless and even if he is how stupid is she? I feel sorry for her. Yes they are f ing liars!
Apr 1 - 6PM
TLSM
TLSM's picture

Go Jen79!

I am THE WORST and have been SOOOO BAD at peeking... Guess what happens? ONE HUNDRED PERCENT OF THE TIME I REGRET IT!!! Ugh! This is why I HATE FACEBOOK. Knowing it's out there, "he" is out there..."they" are out there for everyone to see, including me! It's horrible. :( The last I peeked was Tuesday or Wednesday and I feel better. I haven't googled her name either(for research purposes only. LOL!). Yes...this past relationship has made me an obsessive nut case...I hope to GOD she can't find out I've been googling her! I WOULD DIE! This is what you (WE) need to do before you (WE) are tempted. 1. First STOP 2. Fast forward and imagine how you will feel if you peek. No matter WHAT we see or DON'T see, it's going to hurt. I am sick of wondering. I also believe my obsessive thoughts are me trying to put pieces of the puzzle together of what happened and what is happening now. It doesn't solve crap. It only makes me feel worse. There is no life threatening reason WHY I need to find out what My ex-ass narc and this little sewer-rat are doing. F*ck 'em. They don't deserve my my time, all my indept research and psycho FBI'ing! HA!
Apr 2 - 8AM (Reply to #13)
Smitten Kitten (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

I recommend blocking him and

I recommend blocking him and the GF, that way you can't peek without unblocking them. When you unblock someone, you can't re-block for 48 hours. This is what keeps me from peeking anymore. Because I know the Narc would probably realize he was unblocked during that 48 hour period and block me instead. Then he would be back in control! And of course, he would also know I did it to go to his page and "see" him which would just feed his ego some more and he would know I still care.
Apr 1 - 10PM (Reply to #12)
Finally Faced It
Finally Faced It's picture

obsessing

Nothing good ever comes from cyber-stalking! Nothing good ever comes from cyber-stalking! Nothing good ever comes from cyber-stalking! I like your step-by-step guide on what we need to do. I'm going to try it. I'm the same, I feel like this entire situation has turned me into a crazy person. I read somewhere that obsessing is our way of trying to find a reason to blame ourselves.... I'm so done!! FFI
Apr 1 - 6PM
TLSM
TLSM's picture

My ex Narc was somatic

He was somatic and VERY VERY VERY secretive. Aren't they all? The lying the hiding...
Apr 1 - 4PM
Susan32
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Cerebral Narcs

Tend to be secretive. So the ex-Psych prof doesn't have a FB/Myspace page, thank goodness. He was paranoid about people from his past finding him. Sometimes I think the public brutality of the final D&D would've gotten him fired, he could've pulled the "poor me" victim routine claiming a student had seduced him into losing his livelihood, he could've pursued me for "wronging" him... and he could've moved on with a clean slate to another school, nobody would've known about it. But no, he ended up getting tenure. He has to work with people who remember how he treated me. I think *TENURE* was his punishment. There was only *ONE* time the ex-P posted personal info on the Web about his girlfriend having his twins, him marrying her after she gave birth, and his parents moving in to raise them. That page was yanked down looong ago. His personal life is now a mystery (not that I'd want to know, thankyouverymuch) All the references to his kids, and his parents raising them, do NOT mention him, let alone the girlfriend/wife. It's as if his kids were orphaned, and the grandparents stepped in to raise them. Agnes Murphy has said that cerebral Narcs tend to be secretive... she's right. The ex-P isn't exactly going on a Charlie Sheen "Torpedo of Truth" tour.
Apr 1 - 4PM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Jen

Been there done that !! Liars, users, & Losers!!!! Idealk
Apr 1 - 4PM (Reply to #8)
jen79
jen79's picture

IdealK

agreed!!!!!
Apr 1 - 4PM
sara-smile
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Jen79

Amen sister!!!! They are all liars! That's the only way they can keep anyone around in their screwed up lives! They are such suck F-ers that they have to LIE to make themselves look like a decent human instead of a soulless DEVIL! Bastards!!! I have access to my Narc's email account and I haven't looked at in weeks because it always depressed me and sent me back down into a spiral! I couldn't get him out of my head reading all the lies he was telling his new GF! I stopped looking! I had to for my sanity! He's a sick bastard and reading all of his lies and bullshit only kept me down! I thank GOD he does not have a FB account. (He's too stupid to figure out how to set one up!) Stay away from FB and anything else that gives you info on him and you'll feel tons better!! I promise! Hugs!
Apr 1 - 4PM (Reply to #2)
jen79
jen79's picture

Sarah smile

thanks sister. Yes I will not snoop again. For what. I have proof now what bastard he is. Its beyond any description how evil they are. We doubt and doubt, cause we cannot comprehend that a "person" can be like that. But its true. Evil exists. I hope he will die. And the poor stupid girl, gosh I want to slap her, that she fell again in his web of lies. She is a nice woman, I know this. I was so proud of her, that she got away. But again. He will destroy her like every women he was with. But its not my problem anymore. I need to concentrate on that I was smart enough to end this bullshit, that I got away, that I listened to my instince. And a better life is ahead of me, and maybe even one day true love, a healthy relationship, with someone decent, honest and lovely.
Apr 1 - 4PM (Reply to #3)
sara-smile
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Jen79

I laughed so hard when you said "I hope he will die"! I wish that 100 times a day! I wish a horrible painful death too.......nothing quick! I felt sorry for the new GF too until she rubbed her WONDERFUL relationship in my face and said went into great detail about how they are planning on getting married! She emailed me for info then rubbed all that garbage in my face??? She can kiss my ass just like he can. They deserve each other! You need to concentrate on you now!! When he trashes her life Idealk and I will come with you to sing to her "I told you so" at the top of our lungs! :) It's all about YOU now. F them! Hugs!
Apr 1 - 5PM (Reply to #6)
ShaynasMommy
ShaynasMommy's picture

you can count me in on that too

If she even understands what's going on when she gets D&D'd, that is. My ExN's subsequesnt gf took no notice when I tried to warn her, as a courtesy. But when he took her to Hell and back for four years.......and 8 years later she informs me through another mutual friend of ours that the Ex N was getting married?????WTF? I had been WAY over it by then and had forgotten she even existed. And last I knew, this woman was still on speaking terms with the Devil. Isn't THAT some crazy stuff? This woman took the time to try to hurt me through the grapevine, years after the fact, when I had NOTHING to do with their breakup, and in fact tried to warn her about getting involved with a douchebag? So, essentially, she was directing her anger and frustration at me instead of HIM. And I was a previous OW, not the NEW OW. It made no sense. Its funny how some people deal with denial like that. So some women NEVER learn. Be grateful tat we are among the ones who did.
Apr 1 - 4PM (Reply to #4)
jen79
jen79's picture

Sarah smile

Amen sister. I hope he will die a slowely cruel death, with no one around, completely alone, no money, and nothing. And yes. Fuck them!
Apr 1 - 5PM (Reply to #5)
ifinallygotit
ifinallygotit's picture

FB horrors

Yeah, I got slapped by peeking on FB, but it actually helped break my denial down seeing him being so superficial showing off a superficial looking woman - part of me thought, what a perfect pair! Along with the horror that I actually deeply loved this man, I could see by his idoitic grin and need to be the"man" that he just isn't much of a man...this really hurts me to admit just how pathetic he looked to me showing off his new life and to alos know I was pathetic for my long role in the drama. He must have really seen me a perfect fool to play for 10 years!!! However, I do NOT hate him and it seems I may skip the anger stage. I was angry the last few years we were together so maybe I already processed it. Plus, this my fifth serious long relationship (the others like marriages) and some of those men had a meaner spirit than my big jackass ex N. My other boyfriends were all smarter, but I just loved this guy so much... I think he filled a huge void from having no family or kids in my city. I loved to spoil him and I contributed to this F___ing insanity putting up with his ridiculous N antics and silent treatment - I just got lost over time - used to be strong - want to be strong again. I blocked FB once I got myself to believe he replaced me with a hooker type lady...the thought of them is so gross. I guess this makes him happier - so be it. I am also sad to know the game is up and that I know too much to be able to believe him again, because I sill love him - mine had a very old soul nurturing side that I needed big time and I miss that - but do not miss this insanity - abandonment, silent treatment, lies...