Narcissist Recovery Blog

The Airplane Ride

Do you love to travel but hate to fly? Me too…

Did you love a masked man now he's exposed, and you cant let go? Me too..

Many years ago I had a terrible fear of flying, If you know me I love new places, new adventures, getting there was such a stressful mind game.

My trip would be planned for months, Pairs, Hawaii, Rome etc. WOW how exciting, there's one problem. Getting there!!!

The damn airplane ride, its big, carries 100's of people,how is this thing going to fly???

Has the pilot had enough sleep, enough to eat and is sober? God I hope so.

Did the mechanics check to make sure everything is in working order? God I hope so..

Did security check the passengers properly?? God I really hope so…

The Denial System of the Codependent and the Narc

The Narc comes back when supply is low and he needs or wants something.

Tells you new lies. What he thinks you want to hear

He has to, otherwise you will not listen.

He promises to try harder. Never to hurt you like that again.

He can't live without you and will make the necessary changes, after all, you were no prize either is what he hopes you will believe (it takes two mentality). He has changed and will be better and different.

He hopes your time apart has taught you some lessons regarding how to better behave.

He suggests to you, not talk to quite so much about the relationship. After all.....

He's back

He loves you.

Now. Let it be.

He's back. Be happy.

Narc speak:

I'm back!!

As though time has stood still.

Step 5 – Wake Up

While chatting with a member today regarding how much we give to the Narc and how little we receive in return a story came to mind regarding a therapy session the Narc and I had with a Psychologist and how it relates to my family of origin dynamic.

This is Step 5 work, Wake Up, so if you are new and do not relate to this right now, no worries, continue to keep working the first 3 steps for now.

Step 5: We tap into the power of our mind to awaken our spirit and find ourselves again.

The Cycle

BY Guest Blogger Prettypeeved:

This is how it worked for me, until I'd had enough:

1. Narc is all nice and friendly. We get on well, we have some fun, we (apparently) bond.

2. Facts about Narc start to look suspiciously exaggerated or outright fiction. Bond looks suspiciously one-sided.

3. Narc starts playing mind games and evading attempts to determine the truth.

4. I get increasingly angry.

5. A point is reached where I begin to think of abandoning the Narc and moving on.

6. Narc seems to sense this, and D&Ds.

7. I am "put on the naughty step" and "given a time out" for about 3 months, until I learn to "behave".

8. It hurts to be abandoned and rejected, so when he returns, he is forgiven for his behaviour, and I try to forget it and move on.

No Contact - The Ultimate Revenge by Nemesis

Due to a busy work and teaching schedule, I have not been able to write blogs on hot topics being discussed in our forum lately. I apologize and hope to have more time to do this soon, but in the meantime, I'd like to share this amazing post written by Nemesis on the topic of revenge.

I particularly like this because I often see the topic of revenge come up here. I do not advocate revenge in any way, shape or form as I believe the best form of revenge is to live a happy life and two wrongs never make a right.

Additionally, while there are some Narcissists who border on the edge of Psychopathy, there are plenty of Narcissists who simply can't help themselves and do not hurt us with intent.

Snot's Funny

Did you ever feel like a million bucks? Good hair day, great outfit, pants fit just right! God, I'm hot stuff!

Today, I'm having lunch with the CEO to discuss my success at work! I look great and going to lunch at a high end restaurant!What a Day, even the weather is perfect.

The lunch went great! A lot was discussed to further my success! I feel like the Queen of the world!!

Well time to excuse myself for a moment and use the ladies room. I wash my hands, thinking about the great lunch conversation and my hot self. I look up in the mirror to check my hair, OMG, OMG, !!! I've been strutting my stuff with this big nasty booger in my nose.

Beware of the: NARC ATTACK; A Narcissists Revenge ~Goldie

You are in early recovery or new recovery after a slip. You have made it through the hardest part, or so you thought. He or She is now out of your life and you are ready to go NO CONTACT for the first time or again. In new recovery for most of us, one part of the day we are empowered and feeling like we are getting ourselves back and the other part is pure torture.

The knowing in one part of your brain that it is a no win situation and then of course the emotional part kicks in and the bittersweet sadness, longing, and physical withdrawal. Cognitive dissonance. These relationships are like an addict with their drug and most describe the withdrawal as a physical aching and pain.

A big welcome to all of you joining or visiting our forum for female PD's/It's All About Her

This is fantastic Lisa,

We now we have a place of healing here where we can reach both men and women. Also we do address ALL the personality disorders. I will include a link so you can read a more detailed description of the other PD's and as Lisa said there are more diagnoised male narcissists. Women traditionally tend to be more borderline and histrionic.

Most all of the PD's do in fact include Narcissistic features and components, therefore, you may see the narcissistic traits in them as well. Also a PD can have traits of other PD's without necessarily having that disorder full blown. They usually have a primary diagnosis and then can have features of one or more of the other PD's. This is why it is important to read the links and see what fits for the PD whom you know.

OMG, Lisa E. Scott, you had me in tears

Lisa, my dear,

You are truly gifted with the art of writing, and coming from a family of published writers; that is a HUGE compliement from me.

I particularly loved this comment and this is WHY I am loyal and devoted to this site and cause:

"We're ruffling some feathers and I like it!" Lisa E. Scott

I also want to ruffle some feathers. Enough is enough of how women are being treated in the year: 2011. This needs to stop and this needs to stop NOW and I am privledged to be a part of bringing this awareness and healing to others and myself.

We are in a position as AMERICAN women who are healing and becoming the POWERFUL, self actualized women whom GOD himself intended us to be.

Have you read the bible where it refers to women as the HEART of the household.

Why the Narcissist Cannot Accept Our Love

I just received the following message from Nemesis and with her permission, am sharing it with all of you as I feel it is very profound and should help many of us better understand why the narcissist simply cannot accept our love.

"It's really complicated - I had to do loads of reading about it before I could even begin to understand it and make it sink in. But from what I've read, I understand that they really can't handle someone loving them.