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sick00's story

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#1 Sep 26 - 1PM
Anonymous (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

sick00's story

Not sure if my ex has NPD,but he has alot of traits.I will give a few examples of his personality.

He's the type that think he knows everything,he's arrogant,selfish,controlling,manipulative,chronic liar,mental emotional and have been physical abusive,he always says he's Perfect/Great,its always the other person who need help/crazy.Thats the bad side of him.

The other side is loving,caring,affectionate,attentitve,charming etc.Now let me start with a few incident that occured while we were dating.He would always say I didnt appreciate or value him,meaning if i didnt rub his feet or give him a massage I was wrong.Now i didnt have a problem with giving him those things but every other day was a bit much,when I was tired.If i wanted to go out with my girlfriends he would text all night or call.If i didnt text or call while i was out,he would ask why and I dont love him like he loves me.Argue over petty small things,like why didnt I tell my friend i was watching tv with him,when she called.

If we went out together and my friends were going to the same place.He wanted me to be under him all night and I could go over towards my friends for awhile,but if he felt like i was giving them to much time..he would say,"u put others before me".His anger and temper was very scary,he would yell and scream.Spit would be flying and sweat would be dripping,over something petty.If I didnt say thank you when he expected me to say it,i should be apologizn to him and im wrong.If a guy friend calls me,he is asking why he's calling.If i stay on the phone longer than he thinks i should,when I off he would be upset.He's a serial cheater and liar,when I take him back he always would say its because I didnt appreciate or value him.

The women would call and tell me the same things about his behavior.Saying he's crazy and need help.He move in with women tell them he loves them and come running back to me.Like a fool I think he will change and except him back.

He's very irresponsible with insecure issues,but Im the one whos insecure and dont know how to love a GREAT man.I know you guys are saying why do I still love someone who dont love you right?!I guess its the other side that is nice to me that I still long for.Dont know if I'll ever see him again or talk with him.He has sent text msgs but I dont read them I just hit ignore or delete.I miss him this is true,but I know he's not the one for me.

How do I just get him out of my system?

Sep 26 - 10PM
NanC (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

He sounds just like

He sounds just like everybody elses N's. I know its not easy to stay away cause they are such good bull shitters but stay away! He's going to end up giving you a disease that he's picked up from one of these women & then you are really going to be sad! Make a list of all the ugly things he did & said & things that turned you off about him. When you miss him , pull out that list. Like everyone says here, they didn't change for u, they didn't change for the woman before you & they are sure as hell not going to change for the woman after you! What has helped me sooo much is remembering, they are sick! They are not even completely human, they are damaged goods, & most likely, even the devil's rejects!!!!!!! You are too good for him! He was lucky to have even had a shot with you, he blew it, so he can go screw himself.! Freakin loser! Let him go blow smoke somebody elses ass!
Sep 26 - 7PM
dolce (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

All of it sounds

All of it sounds familiar! Keep no contact. Thats the only way out. ~Free to Be~
Sep 26 - 11PM (Reply to #2)
Barbara (not verified)
Anonymous's picture

sick00

Welcome... - Get Lisa's book - go through ALL the pages on 'Message Board' as I have loaded it with articles and your questions have probably already been asked and answered many times. Click through the pages and read what interests you. - read our blog: http://allabouthim.com - chock full of articles about Ns and healing - listen to our free radio show: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/allabout him Get into counseling ASAP. And stay here so the wonderful members of this board can help you understand on your healing journey ~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Pathologicals only discard the best, most precious of gems of people... not the worst. They despise the strong, principled, decent & honest. Their discarding of you is then their highest commendation of your worth!" - A.V.
Oct 14 - 6PM (Reply to #3)
Chloe
Chloe's picture

Love

Love is not controlling. It is appreciating and giving and trusting and sharing. Love is happy. Love is a gift. Love is beautiful. "I love you," is easy to say. Love is not giving, giving, and giving without receiving back. Love is not giving a back rub or foot rub without such an appreciation, and giving back. This man does not know what love is because he can't love, he's incapable. It's hard to imagine that someone is incapable of loving someone else, whether it be a parent, sibling, spouse, or one's child, but it's true. I have spoken to people who have been diagnosed with this disorder and who have sought for help. Those very people admit the same thing: While they care/like their family, if they died tomorrow, they would not be broken up and broken hearted for very long. One thing they all have said is that before they die, they want to really know what love feels like.