Help with closure

1 post / 0 new
#1 January 8, 2017 - 5:48pm

Help with closure

I'm new here and am just discovering the what and why of what just happened to me. I'm a professional in the mental health field (licensed) and was having a long distance relationship for three years with an attorney who I now have discovered is a Narc. / suspected borderline. The relationship was a whirlwind romance with promises and plans for a future together. While it was a long distance relationship, we saw each other several times each month for extended periods and had significant communication every day. Then somewhat gradually, over about a three month period, I was devalued, discarded, and dropped on my head about three weeks ago. I learned that my Narc, who I thought was my "life partner", had reconciled with his wife and moved in with her, without telling me. I learned about it by doing a quick google search on the internet. When I confronted him, he was cruel and dismissive and I haven't heard from him much since - he just disappeared. I have written him an email to request some type of closure, but there is no response. I have been tormented, unable to work (I manage a large office of professional counselors, ironically), unable to eat, move, sleep, etc. I am shocked that I didn't recognize the dysfunction early on in him, and I am reeling with the fact that I gave 3 years of my life, and a future commitment, to someone who was a complete con artist. I have had many relationships and never was I "conned" like this, or treated most wonderfully, and with most cruelty. My fear is that I will be scarred / have PTSD, and not be able to recovery properly from this and not having any closure. Thank you for any advice.