The notion of expecting a Narcissist to tell you the entire truth is frankly, ridiculous.

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#1 Mar 12 - 8AM
Goldie
Goldie's picture

The notion of expecting a Narcissist to tell you the entire truth is frankly, ridiculous.

I frequently hear:

"He said he was not lying.

He won't tell me the truth no matter how many times we go over it.

I talked with him again because I want the truth.

I know he is lying, but I want him to tell me the truth.

I hired a private detective to find out the truth.

I need the truth.

The truth, the truth, the truth............"

Kinda drives you nuts when you are still looking for or expecting the truth at some point.

Even when you have a sit down and they promise to tell you the truth, they will only tell you the version of the truth which they want you to hear.

They may throw you a bone and tell you a piece of the truth to satisfy you or keep you quiet, yet trust me when I tell you, they are still lying and holding back the from the entire truth.

Many go back time and time again looking for the truth, only to find out, they are never going to find it.

Many go back after thinking they have at long last been told the truth, only to find out, they are STILL lying consistently.

If there is one thing I have learned about Narcissists is that they LIE. They all lie, and the people who think their Narcissist is not lying to them are simply deluding themselves.

The notion of expecting a Narcissist to tell you the entire truth is frankly, ridiculous.

Once you become fully up to speed with this fact, you are on your way to a full recovery.

Towards the end with my Narcissist, I was so tired and disgusted with his lie's, that I told him to STOP talking to me. Yes, he was still living in my house until I got the r/o to GET HIM OUT (he would not leave) and I said, STOP talking to me, when your lips are moving, you are lying and I don't want to hear another word.

This IS the point you need to get to.

The point where you understand and get, on every level, that this jack ass is lying to you and YOU do NOT want to listen to another word, ever again.

Narcissists enjoy dupers delight, they actually get a high over watching you squirm and blame yourself and believe their lies and question them. People who understand that someone is lying to them, do not question them.

So, if you are still questioning a narcissist, then on some level, you are still thinking that you are going to be hearing the truth sometime soon.

You are not going to ever ever ever, get to the full complete truth with a narcissist. They will continue to tell you what they want you to know or what you want to hear until the end of time.

They play people for fools and get off on it.

They think they are great/superior to you because they are clever and smarter than you when you believe their lies. It's a game to them.

You will stop listening to him, when YOU decide you no longer want to play the fool.

It was liberating and freeing for me when I woke up one day and said: Shut the F up and get out of my room and STOP TALKING TO ME.

I said to myself, I refuse to have my head in a spin day in and day out, trying to get to the bottom of what is the truth. Sifting through all of the details, frankly, was driving myself nuts.

The truth is, narcissists lie. So, seriously, what is the point in listening to them talk???

There is no point whatsoever.

My personal favorite is when people tell me that he doesn't lie about the cheating, he doesn't cheat on me, he only lie's about other things. If my narcissist cheated on me that would be a deal breaker.

Seriously???

Cherry picking, what you think a liar lies about and what you think they are truthful about, does not work with a liar.

Lying is not like a buffet table where you can choose what to select and what to leave on the table.

A liar lie's, period.

If you think, you know what is true and what is a lie....

Guess again.

Sure, some of it may be true, absolutely, however, what is true and what is not, is not something you are ever going to know.

A liar generally gives you a part of the truth, so that is sounds somewhat plausible. What part of that is true is anyone's guess.

Generally, the part that is the lie is not something you discover when you are still in the thick of it.

Many I work with do not find out the extent of their lie's until they are completely out of it.

Why??

Because when you are still in the game, your denial system and head spin is generally so intense that you remain in a semi conscious state which does not allow full clarity.

Full clarity comes when you are no longer under their control and you are able to get your rational thinking and rational mind back on straight.

Their continuous influence makes it difficult to see the forest through the tree's.

But he said.....but he said.

Well, I know this is true because he told me such and such.

I hear this everyday, but he said, but he said. So therefore, I know that it is true.

I say, he's a liar, right?

Yes.

So, HOW do you know that is true??

Well he wouldn't lie about that.

REALLY???

How do you know??

If you think you know what your narcissist is lying about and what is true......

Guess again.

Together and Healing,
Goldie

Have you had enough? Are you tired of playing the fool to Narcissist? It really is that simple. We tend to complicate things. A relationship with a liar will never work.

Relationships are built on trust.There is no trust or loyalty factor with a Narcissist. A narcissist simply cannot be trusted to tell you the truth. Plain and simple..

More on a Narcissists lying.

http://www.lisaescott.com/forum/2015/02/24/narcissists-lie-you-have-just...

Mar 19 - 11AM
Cybyl
Cybyl's picture

I can't stop thinking about this post, it's haunting me

Mar 15 - 3PM
Viola22
Viola22's picture

Yup

Mar 17 - 12PM (Reply to #5)
Goldie
Goldie's picture

Exactly Viola

Mar 13 - 9PM
LiarLawyer
LiarLawyer's picture

Spot on Goldie

Mar 12 - 9AM
Hunter
Hunter's picture

Liar, liar pants on fire.

Mar 12 - 8AM
ItsFinallytime
ItsFinallytime's picture

Thank you, Goldie. I love