When does the fantasy finally die?

I have been no contact since march and have read books got a great therapist. I also full understand the depth of his deception, and the magnitude of his pure evil. He isn't a narc, he is a full on psychopath scoring in the high 30th DVM test and High score in the Anti-Social as well.
I know it was his plan from the very beginning to harm, even kill. Steal and destroy. The months of no contact have shed enormous light on every manipulation, secret relationships, you name it.
I saw how he targeted and every set up, his plans executed to perfection. He destroyed me, my entire life wiped out. Job, friends, reputation, finances I am unrecognizable to most people now. He tried to killed, Felony assault with a deadly weapon inflicting serious bodily injury, felony assault on a female and 2nd degree trespass. That is but one of the charges his dream team of lawyers got him off on. Yes he walked and I got the $38,000 bill for the injuries and property damage. All he had to say about why he did it was, " I felt like it at the time" " it was pretty cool experience and I got away with it" direct quote. Thank you your honor! Pfff! Any who. Why am I still dealing with CD? Why am I still pining away waiting for things to be different someday. Why a am I waiting for him to say "I am so sorry" I am a psychopath it's what I do.
I need to find closure, I need to get that morsel of hope that he has even a drop of decency in him. He is the biblical definition of satan, pure, raw unfiltered evil. 8 charges of assault on a female 3 of them felonies and he always walks. Never spent a day in prison and he laughs! And I'm waiting for one day.... One day he will be sorry and feel remorse? An evil sadistic empty soulless Cain? Who roams about looking for people to destroy for his entertainment. A person who refers to the value of a human life to that of an ant?
WTF is wrong with me? Any thoughts? Any help? I am at a loss. And frustrated with myself!