My Story

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#1 Jul 15 - 8AM
Niels
Niels's picture

My Story

Hi,
I feel fortunate to have found this place to direct my feelings and experience on this matter ,since we all know , it can be sort of a ride to hell !
I just went NC about 1 and a half month ago. I was graduately getting the picture of a girl who was not normal !
At that time i had been i the rollercoaster for about 1 year.
I wrote her an email - saying that i wanted to end our relationship.
She then shows up in my garden and
persistently claimed she had offered me an appology in a situation where i Knew she never did.
And of course she said it was me who didnt offer her a proper apology.
She then collected her stuff around the house and left without goodbye.

And the stories goes on and on when you look back on it !
The thing is your brain is washed away so you dont really make any sense out of all the trouble.
A lot of times when i was fleeing the crimescene and needed to get away in a hurry , each and everytime i would forget my most important belongings.

But the thing that made me aware of it all was my own reaction to her behavior.
I felt like i had been run over by a mental bulldozer or something.
And the way it feels now is like someone has broken into my heart and home and just about ruined everything they possibly could get hold of.
And
I would say that the thing that i really have a hard time with is this.

She was a friend of mine. Not close but you know , i knew her from the past and alot of the same friends.
And we did have some romantic relation about 10 years ago.

And this makes it pretty hard to understand !
How can someone you think you know well and always have been ,seemingly a very loving and nice person.
She is now suddenly the demon of your love and light !
She would say I love you all the time and giving me things (presents) all the time
But suddenly and i noticed this was always so - when we were having the greatest moments- she would say something "weird " or inappropriate. Always kind of opposite of your opinion.

But you know
I really miss my friend
And the sex
But then again
I really dont miss the feeling of being in a room with someone who is needy all the time.
But i guess i havent relalized until now, how severe and damaging it is.
Thats why i am pretty glad i found something like this.
THANKS

Niels

Jul 15 - 11AM
Goldie
Goldie's picture

Hi Niels

Jul 15 - 12PM (Reply to #2)
Niels
Niels's picture

My story

Jul 15 - 12PM (Reply to #3)
Niels
Niels's picture

My story

Jul 15 - 12PM (Reply to #4)
Goldie
Goldie's picture

I know, I hear you

Jul 17 - 2AM (Reply to #5)
Niels
Niels's picture

Feelings