Floundering

I am going on 3 months of no contact - face to face!!! But I have looked at facebook and have interaction with his family so of course I hear things. Like he is miserable with OW. I have to admit, my heart flutters when I think of the possibility of him coming back. I miss him, but I know that I should not be thinking this way. What the heck is wrong with me. Also, there was another man that wanted to get involved right after my N left. He said how he had noticed me years ago but didn't approach because of N. I totally steered clear because I kept reading about love bombing and did not want to get trapped again. Well now his love life is going well and I am feeling alone. I don't want to make any more mistakes. I am making excuses for N's behavior, rationalizing why it would be ok if we got back together, etc. etc. I can't stop this crazy thinking...Any suggestions on how to convince myself that walking away is the right thing. I always believed when we were just the two of us living in the house, things were fine. I understood him and he understood me. We had some fun times. Now I am missing him and the thought that he might be thinking about me stirs up all kinds of emotions in me. Help!!!!