Do they ever really go away?
Do they ever really go away?
I read an old post that I can't find now. It was about an N-Ex interfering in a marriage. The writer was questioning if she could really love her husband, if she could really love anyone who was normal. The post brought me to tears. I've thought about it all morning. That same circumstance is why I'm here trying to free myself once and for all.
My Ex, who I have had to see and talk to because of my son, has been hovering and mind-gaming me for years - 14 years - about not really loving my husband with the same passion that I loved him. Here I am trying to talk about braces and summer camp and he's winking, trying to touch my hand and convince me that he's the better man, and his rhetoric really screws with my head. YES, I have already gone NC and blocked everything that I can block.
I know the intensity of the two relationships are not the same - not even close. There were long(hours and hours)of intimate conversations with my EX that don't exist in my marriage (he called it "contemplating the universe"). There was connectedness, someone who finishes my sentences kind of thing - does not exist in my marriage. And sex pales in comparison (well... because the N had so freaking much practice).
I thought I LOVED my Ex. I thought that man knew everything and walked on water. I know that isn't love, I do, but I don't think I know how to be happy with normal.
I have started wondering in recent years if I actually love my husband.
It's like the narc is still ruining my life and he's not even my mate anymore.
FW
Finnegan
Finnegan, after reading your
Journey on...
Finnegan, I give you
spinning
Journey/ Spinning
Thank you, Everyone
Be prepared for contact
He'll contact you
Please don't say that!!!!!
They don't all come back,
LOL
How about some kindness to yourself for a change?
;-)
I'm not convinced you do
Thanks, Goldie
Lights on
Finnegan, please join