he is marrying other woman

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#1 Dec 22 - 8PM
Nomoredrama
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he is marrying other woman

its been awhile since I have posted on here...but I was with my narc for 19 years..i have 2 children with him..I had to move 1200 miles away from him to get his hooks out of me...its been 2 years..we are now divorced( a month ago) and he is marrying her..the OW. They are moving to SC where we were supposed to go and today it hurt me when I found out. Maybe i just wanted him to lead the poor miserable life he continued to lead after I left countless women, including OW, drinking, no job, and pitiful. Maybe I wanted him to suffer and be in anguish like I was. However after I found out about this one, I felt punched in the stomach. That was my dream with him to live in the country she is a city girl, not a country girl.So i took this day and cried and was mad because I know its hi last effort to hurt me.
When i left him I weighed 100lbs, smoked a pack of cigarettes a day, and was a hot mental mess, like we all were. However I educated myself when I moved far away on Narcs and read all books including Lisa's and was my biggest advocate in healing. I started going to gym and lifting weights( we all need something to take away our pain) and now am a certified personal trainer and am competing in body building contests( which my ex narc loathes this because he was a body-builder who used to tell me I could never do it). I did not do it for him though I did it for me!!! for healing and a hobby. I brought myself back up piece by piece. tear by tear, even after he discarded me and threw me away. No i have not dated and to be honest I really do not think I am ready if I can still cry about him, but i am sorry it hurt today, and I have not hurt in a long time.
Does that mean I am gonna call him or text him ...nope he is still blocked, and beside thats what he wants me to do. I bought my children a minute phone to communicate with him about 6 months ago. I put 250 minutes on it and there is 242 still on it, IN 6 MONTHS he has called them a total of 8 minutes..pitiful.
I am not even sure if I have forgiven him or if I can, today when I found this out i felt like something was ripped out of me, after all this time. Someone just tell me that is normal!!! we just divorced and he is remarrying already and moving and building a house with her on what was once our property, that was my idea...today I hate him all over again.
Thanks for listening needed to vent, now carry on. I will be ok.

Jan 8 - 5PM
WantThePain2End (not verified)
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I'm sorry for your pain.

Dec 26 - 8AM
Hunter
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Why wouldn't you feel hurt.?

Dec 25 - 10PM
aurora
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Im with you

Dec 23 - 8AM
boomer14
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I can relate...

Dec 27 - 11AM (Reply to #5)
HappyToForget
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Time will help

Dec 23 - 5AM
SECM1968
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I would struggle too.....

Dec 23 - 4AM
Payitforward
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Nomoredrama

Dec 26 - 7AM (Reply to #2)
Janie53
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Payitforward